Stacy Quinn was Fit, healthy, and full of energy at age 41, and never associated the signs of stroke with someone of her age so she avoided getting the help she needed.
Socials:
www.facebook.com/stacyq1
www.instagram.com/mystrokeofhope/
www.mystrokeofhope.com
Highlights:
01:11 Introduction
04:11 Ignoring The Signs Of Stroke
08:08 Carotid Artery Dissection
14:40 Rushing Recovery After A Stroke
19:47 Possible Carotid Artery Dissection Causes
23:48 Why Me?
29:40 Road To Recovery And Finding Purpose
35:17 Stacy Quinn Taking Time To Heal
42:21 My Stroke Of Hope
50:58 Bill’s Upcoming Book
1:04:30 This Is Who I Am
Transcription:
Stacy 0:00
I remember there were days afterward where I’d have to lay under my desk and one of my colleagues that worked for me I said, can you please cover? I just need to close my eyes my head hurts.
Stacy 0:09
And I would actually lay under my desk for 15 minutes and close my eyes and then go back to work. I really should have taken time off and that’s something that I would advise anyone that goes through something like that, but I was in this mode where I needed my normal state and I needed to be next those doctors just in case.
Bill 0:25
You used to lay under your desk to sleep? That desperate you were that desperate to calm your brain to keep it chill and quiet for a little bit. And then you actually even got them to cover your desk with what?
Stacy 0:43
Oh, someone would cover for me while I was under my desk like if something came up. I didn’t have a tent or anything. But yeah, someone would, cover for me.
Intro 0:58
This is the recovery after stroke podcast, with Bill Gasiamis. Helping you navigate recovery after stroke.
Introduction
Bill 1:11
Hello and welcome to recovery after stroke. A podcast full of answers, advice, and practical tools for stroke survivors to help you take back your life after a stroke and build a stronger future. I’m your host three-time stroke survivor, Bill Gasiamis.
Bill 1:25
After my own life was turned upside down and I went from being an active father to being stuck in hospital. I knew if I wanted to get back to the life I loved before, my recovery was up to me.
Bill 1:37
After years of trial and error, I learned how to heal my brain and rebuild a healthier and happier life than I ever dreamed possible. And now I’ve made it my mission to empower other stroke survivors like you to recover faster, achieve your goals and take back the freedom you deserve.
Bill 1:54
This is Episode 144 and my guest today is Stacy Quinn who experienced a stroke at age 41 due to a carotid artery dissection. Recently, Stacy became aware that she is more grateful for life and has implemented some changes that have enhanced life and supported recovery.
Bill 2:12
Now if you have enjoyed the recovery after stroke podcast interviews, please share your favorite episode on social media give the show a five-star review on iTunes. And if you’re watching on YouTube, please give this episode of thumbs up and subscribe to be notified of new interviews.
Bill 2:27
Your support with this will make it easier for other stroke survivors to find the show, and perhaps feel better about the situation that they find themselves in. Thanks so much for listening. And now it’s on with the show.
Stacy 2:38
I have to say I’m so excited to meet you. I have like followed you and your work and you do amazing work. And I wish I would have known you after I had my stroke because I struggled to find someone who could help me. So I found you a little late in the process. But, yeah, I wish I would have known.
Bill 2:55
Look lots of people said that when you had your stroke in 2015, I wouldn’t have been in any state to help anybody. I could barely help myself, I was probably just coming on to 12 months after surgery, brain surgery so I was a bit of a mess.
Bill 3:12
I did have the podcast, but it didn’t really hit the mark, because it was being done infrequently. I didn’t know who my audience was, and the stories I was sharing, you know, I wasn’t really good at understanding why I was sharing their stories. And now that I know. It has made a big difference to a whole bunch of people.
Bill 3:33
And that’s the strange part. I didn’t start it for you guys have started it for me. And the cool thing about it is, is that lots of other people now are now saying that it really makes a difference. It gets downloaded three and a half 1000 times a month I mean, it’s been insane.
Bill 3:52
And I remember the first few episodes, I was getting, you know, maybe three or four people listening and they weren’t really listening. They were just checking it out to say that they did. So they can make me feel better. But anyhow, tell me a little bit about you and what happened to you?
Ignoring The Signs Of Stroke
Stacy 4:11
Sure. So what happened to me was, I was in like one of the best shape of my life. I was working out with a trainer I had recently lost a little weight. I wouldn’t have thought Bill that anything more could happen to me than maybe getting the cold or the flu.
Stacy 4:28
But that changed in the blink of an eye. I was working in New York City at the time and I was on the train to my job. I live in New Jersey. So I take a train and I was like I just got this headache. It was the worst I would describe it as the worst headache of my life and I thought wow, you know what, it’s around the holidays, I was going to holiday parties, I was shopping I had a lot going on and it was the end of the year at work.
Stacy 4:51
So things were really hectic. So I thought okay, it’s just stress right. So I went into the coffee shop, got a shot of espresso and I said I’m going to go about my day, this is going to go away.
Stacy 5:02
So it get to my desk, do some work. And then it was time to meet with my new boss and I like my head is throbbing. But I said, I got to get through this. She’s my new boss, I’ve got to make a good impression.
Stacy 5:12
So we’re having a meeting. And suddenly, for the first time since I was a little girl, I couldn’t string together a sentence. It was garble. And then I stopped for a second because you know, it kind of scared me.
Stacy 5:24
And then as soon as it happened, Bill, it went away. So blah, blah, blah. She’s like, are you okay? I’m like, I’m great. go about it. The same thing happens again. But as soon as it happens, is as fast as it goes away?
Stacy 5:37
So she asked me if I was okay. And I said, Yes. And then I went back to my desk. And I consulted Dr. Google, because that’s what we do, right? I’m like severe headache. I get migraine, you know, and then I like, emailed my mom and I said, listen, I had this weird experience, and she goes, go to the hospital, you’re having a stroke.
Stacy 5:55
I said, no, I’m not having a stroke. I’m a young woman, I’m healthy. So she’s like, begging me. And I said, no, but I said, I’m going to go to Urgent Care after I’ll go to Urgent Care after work. So I honored that commitment. And the doctor looked at me, he’s like, you’re fine.
Stacy 6:11
You just have a migraine and you’re stressed out, gives me a prescription sends me home, I take the medicine a couple days later, it’s not getting any better Bill, it’s like headaches getting worse, I went back to urgent care, because it was around New Year’s Eve, and went to the same Center, the woman looks at my record, she’s like you have an ear infection now.
Stacy 6:31
Gee, okay, I did ear drops. Take those. And I’m like rubbing on my neck, my neck is starting to hurt now taking the ear drops. And then now we’re like, 10 days since the slurred speech, the onset of the sudden, severe headache. And I said, I can’t take this, I’d almost rather die than have this headache.
Stacy 6:51
So I googled online and neurologists near the office, and I begged the receptionist to get me in that day. And she did. And I went into him. And he looks at me, and he’s like, Ah, you know, I think you’re okay, but we’ll just send you for an MRI of your neck and your brain just to be sure.
Stacy 7:09
And I said, Doctor, I’m really busy. I don’t really have time to make the appointment and go, I have personal training tonight. So can I go the next day, or later in the week, and he’s like, you can delay the day, but that’s all.
Stacy 7:22
So I’m at the gym, lifting, the head’s pounding. And I go and get the MRI of my brain the next day. And then within hours, my cell phone rings, and it’s the doctor, you know, and I thought Bill, this isn’t good. I have an appointment with him later in the week, they found something and I originally thought they probably had a brain aneurysm or something.
Stacy 7:45
And he’s like, where are you? I was like, why? He’s like, you need to get to the hospital as soon as possible. And I said, I don’t understand. He’s like, you’re going to have a catastrophic stroke. Get to the hospital.
Stacy 7:57
Yeah, I start packing a bag. I don’t know what I’m thinking. I’m thinking I might be there. While I call my dad like, Listen, I got to go to the hospital. And he said there was a team of people waiting for me.
Carotid Artery Dissection
Stacy 8:08
And there were they shuffled me back as soon as possible. And that’s where I learned I had a carotid artery dissection. My blockage at the time was at 90%. And I was probably hours away from what would have been a stroke that left me extremely disabled or would have taken my life.
Bill 8:28
You are one crazy girl. Oh, my God, you sound like me. I did exactly what you did kind of like I argued with the chiropractor, he told me to go to the hospital, because he said, Whatever I am experiencing on my left side, he said, it’s not your back. It’s not anything like that go to the hospital.
Bill 8:52
I argued with my wife, she told me I looked funny. It was seven days before I went to the hospital and finally saw somebody about it. And then they found a bleed on the brain. But what’s interesting about you is you wanted to go to the hospital, you wanted to get a diagnosis. And then when you got the opportunity to go, you didn’t want to be there because it was inconvenient. What the hell’s going on in your mind?
Stacy 9:16
I don’t know, Bill. I mean, I learned so much from this experience, right? Like I always say you need to be the CEO of your own health. if something isn’t right, you need to act on it. But I honestly just think that we don’t believe something like that can happen to us and our mind goes a different way.
Stacy 9:34
And I really don’t know why I was being so I was stupid. And I think after my after this at my episode and my stroke and everything I was very angry with myself for not recognizing the symptoms of stroke, but no one really taught them to me and when I googled images of stroke were old guys.
Stacy 9:55
They were old guys. There was no sign that there was some young woman that this happens to and then I learned through all of this that more women have strokes than men. And we’re commonly misdiagnosed. But that wasn’t anything I learned until it was almost too late, unfortunately.
Bill 10:10
A female is at greater risk of dying from stroke than she is of breast cancer. And breast cancer is one of the worst is one of the best-known issues that women face. And we talk about it and we raise awareness.
Bill 10:24
And there’s in Australia, there’s events every second minute. And you know, it looks like they’re getting all the money from everybody for everything. But yeah, strokes like that. It’s one of the reasons why I became a stroke safe ambassador in 2013, after the first and second bleeds.
Bill 10:41
And it was to just raise awareness because again, I was 37 I had no idea what stroke was, and I only ever considered, I only ever again pictured old people like my granddad type people who had a stroke, you know, and we were all caught by surprise, the whole family was shocked that this was happening.
Bill 11:06
What was it like for your family? Because there’s seven days or 10 days that you’ve done nothing about it? And then all of a sudden you’re in hospital? What’s the conversation you’re having? What happens?
Stacy 11:18
You know, I think everybody was just shocked like this happened to Stacy? Stacy that goes to the gym five weeks, Stacy, that’s a vegetarian. I mean, and I was adamant about my wellness checks going to the doctor, I just think there was a lot of shock that it that it happened to me.
Stacy 11:37
And honestly, I don’t know how some people knew how to react. I found after this experience that people that you thought would be there for you suddenly weren’t. And I felt like some people avoided me like I was a ticking time bomb in some ways. And then people that I hadn’t talked to in years, some people came out of the woodwork.
Stacy 11:58
So that to me was really interesting. And what I found afterwards was because I left the hospital. And because I looked like the same Stacy before, and granted, all of my scars were invisible. And a lot of my symptoms were, you wouldn’t know that I was exhausted my head hurt for months after the fact, I was told I was likely that I could have another stroke within the first 90 days.
Stacy 11:58
So every time I went to bed, I thought am I gonna wake up? So I think that while I was having that I think a lot of people in my life were like, oh, we’re a little afraid of her right now. I mean, my family was great. They were supportive. But there were people that were like, Oh, no, is this contagious, or it was just some reactions really surprised me.
Bill 12:49
It’s common. And the thing I had the same experience, the people that came out of the woodwork that saved me. And I’m not talking about the doctors and those guys, their next level of heroes, but the people who saved me emotionally were not people who I expected.
Bill 13:09
They came from nowhere, people that I knew, just every once in a while. And as a result, we became really, really close, the people who kind of moved away, I feel because they don’t know how to act around somebody that is unwell and that they know how to make it about them, about the person who’s unwell instead of themselves.
Bill 13:30
So you know, when those I had people turn up to the hospital, they do the whole Oh, my God, you had a stroke. But you know, I stubbed my toe the other day, oh, my God, it was so bad, you know, my toe this, and my toe that, and it’s like, hang on a second. It’s not about you, this time it’s about me, shut up and don’t talk.
Bill 13:48
And those people were better off just turning up and giving me a hug and saying, Here I am, and not feeling anxious or nervous or worried about what to say. Just tell me they love me and hug me, and that’s it.
Bill 14:02
So I was kind of glad that they kind of went away, because I didn’t want them around anyway, they were just negative energy or they were bad energy. And they didn’t know they were being that way. They just were that way.
Bill 14:16
So I kind of figured that. What I’m feeling from them not being here is they’re doing me a favor, actually. They’re giving me the best gift they can give me by not not being around. Because intuitively somehow they know them being there is no good for me. So I went with it. Can you relate to that?
Rushing Recovery After A Stroke
Stacy 14:40
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And then, you know, some of the people came back after you know, I was a bit better and you know, that was fine, too. I just think that people I think also when having a stroke and a lot of your scars are invisible. I mean, I remember going I went back to work way too quick.
Stacy 15:00
But I needed a sense of normalcy. And then I had these panic attacks that I needed to be near my doctors, which were in another state in New York. So if I was in the office and something happened, I can get there really fast.
Stacy 15:13
And I remember there were days afterward where I’d have to lay under my desk, go, one of my colleagues that worked for me, I said, can you please cover? I just need to close my eyes, my head hurts.
Stacy 15:23
And I would actually lay under my desk for 15 minutes, and close my eyes, and then go back to work, I really should have taken time off. And that’s something that I would advise anyone that goes through something like that, but I was in this mode where I needed my normalcy and I needed to be next, those doctors just in case.
Bill 15:40
That’s for the highlight reel, what you just said, You used to lay under your desk to sleep that desperate you that desperate to calm your brain to keep it chill and quiet for a little bit. And then you actually even got them to cover your desk? With what?
Intro 16:00
If you’ve had a stroke, and you’re recovery, you’ll know what a scary and confusing time it can be, you’re likely to have a lot of questions going through your mind. Like, how long will it take to recover? Will I actually recover? What things should I avoid In case I make matters worse?
Intro 16:18
Doctors will explain things. But obviously, because you’ve never had a stroke before, you probably don’t know what questions to ask. If this is you, you may be missing out on doing things that could help speed up your recovery. If you find yourself in that situation, stop worrying, and head to recoveryafterstroke.com where you can download a guide that will help you.
Intro 16:39
It’s called seven questions to ask your doctor about your stroke. These seven questions are the ones Bill wished he’d asked when he was recovering from the stroke. They’ll not only help you better understand your condition, they’ll help you take a more active role in your recovery. Head to the website now, recoveryafterstroke.com and download the guide. It’s free.
Stacy 17:13
Oh, someone would cover for me while I was under my desk if something came up. I didn’t have a tent or anything. But yeah, someone would, would cover for me like I just say I need 15 minutes if anyone’s looking for me, because it was just crazy.
Bill 17:31
But this is common, right? This is exactly what people don’t understand the fatigue, the overwhelming the brain, even the bright lights from the fluorescent globes above your head. Tell me about it.
Stacy 17:42
Thank you for saying that, I afterwards would go in certain stores. And I’d have to walk out because of the lighting, I would start to get my headache. And then I get nauseous and I thought I was going to throw up.
Stacy 17:43
And I think people thought I was crazy. I would walk out of stores because of that exact reason. And it’s all these little things that I don’t think people realize that you’re going through afterwards like having, I mean, I went back to work sleeping under my desk, I can’t go into certain stores because of the light.
Stacy 17:43
You know, having to manage stress, because stress isn’t good. not sleeping at night because like, Am I gonna wake up? Is this gonna happen again? I don’t know. And I’m six years later, and I’ll have to stay. I still have those nights where I lay down and I’ll think, am I gonna wake up? Because I’m lucky. This all happened to me while I was awake. Had I not had I not had that moment when I might not have known.
Bill 18:38
Yeah, yeah. What was the underlying cause of the dissection? Do you know?
Stacy 18:45
No. So there are two ways that you can have a dissection. One is it’s traumatic. You have a car accident, you fall, something happens and mine was deemed spontaneous because we can’t connect it to a moment.
Stacy 19:00
But then in my head, I rewind, did I lift a weight wrong? I remember being in the parking lot of the supermarket and having a cart, and they had these things that stopped the cart, so you can’t go far with it. And I remember it stopped and my neck went back.
Stacy 19:14
Was that the moment? It’s just something that I’ll never know. And that was something that was tough afterwards, too, because if we can pinpoint something I did, I’ll never do it again.
Stacy 19:24
But I really I will never know what why it happened. I’ll never know if it was partially caused by stress. I was under a lot of stress. I wasn’t sleeping. I go through my mind. It could be 100 things that cause that I’ll just never know. And maybe it was the wake-up call. I needed to slow down because I was probably on a bad path.
Possible Carotid Artery Dissection Causes
Bill 19:47
So many people say that, look, the dissection it’s most likely a trauma-related dissection because the trauma doesn’t have to be dramatic like it can be a minor trauma. Some people that I’ve spoken to, will tell me it was the most minute thing that they did that cause that other people will say it was a car accident, and it was whiplash.
Bill 20:08
And there’s a whole bunch of different reasons. So I reckon it was a trauma, you just might not have noticed that. And a trauma could be just stretching in the wrong direction, it could be anything.
Bill 20:17
And unfortunately, the artery decides that it can hold or bind together. And, and that’s what loosens is some people have a blood vessel disorder where they have, you know, atherosclerosis very early on for another unknown reason, I’m not sure what the reasons are.
Bill 20:35
So there’s a ton of reasons. But I think, all in all, if you’re somebody who is healthy, “healthy” we don’t really know what that really means. But if you’ve been a vegetarian, and if you’re have exercised, and if you’ve paid attention to what you drink, and whether you smoke and all that kind of stuff.
Bill 20:58
You are unwittingly supporting your body and helping yourself to get to that point where if in the event that you have a life threatening situation arise, you’re in a better position to recover from it and recover from it well and maybe minimize the trouble.
Bill 21:16
And even people who are say, not vegetarian, but eat some protein, but go about life, the way that you go about life, which is you do everything else, and you eat a little bit of protein, but you refrain from, you know, the McDonald’s burgers every second day and all that kind of stuff, you’re very likely to be very well balanced, and in a really good shape to recover from that.
Bill 21:40
So I think you’re doing all the right things, you’re exercising for all the right reasons, probably to look good, feel good, you know, be healthy. And here you go, it paid off. This is a classic example why exercise is really important. And the rest of it is just randomness.
Bill 22:00
That’s kind of where I’m at my blood vessel in my head burst. It was an arteriovenous malformation. It’s kind of a malformed blood vessel. So it didn’t need trauma to burst. It just needed time. And because it’s a lot thinner and not fully formed, it just kind of wears out a little bit quicker, and it pop.
Bill 22:08
So I did the same thing that you did, I thought about all the stuff that I had done. And I did end up saying I overworked. I used to smoke. I used to drink, not heavily drink, but I used to drink. But I used to smoke, I would still work too many hours. I never knew what it was like to go in wood and meditate and calm myself down.
Bill 22:47
I never had the signs from my GP that I had high blood pressure or cholesterol or any of that stuff. There was none of that. But there was this underlying cycle of me just burning candle at both ends and just not being right.
Bill 23:04
And that’s kind of one of the things I was able to do was go, Okay, all right, time to reset. If I get through this drama, then I’ve got to make some serious changes in my life. And I went about doing those and putting that in place. Right. So it sounds like you’re on a similar path.
Stacy 23:22
Yeah, you know, I think though, after everything happened to me, I was angry Bill because I did everything right, when I look back, I didn’t all right for myself. And then this like happens to me. And you know, I went from being able to plank for 30 minutes, I could do all this to being told you can go back to the gym, but you can go on the treadmill starting back at five minutes.
Why Me?
Stacy 23:49
Like I went from like being at perfect health to starting all over again when I had done everything right. So I will say that was something I battled afterwards, like I was pissed off about that. Like, why me? I did it all right.
Bill 24:04
So how did it work out for you? Why me?
Stacy 24:08
You know, I am very grateful I had I’ve had a good outcome. I have some residual side effects. I’ve some things I can’t do. But I am grateful that I had the outcome I have. I’m still here. Part of me thinks that it happened to me One, is the sign is like girl you got to slow down and Two, I’ve been able to take my story and educate people and I didn’t want to do it at first Bill.
Stacy 24:33
One I was embarrassed a little bit and I don’t know why I didn’t want to admit that this happened to me. And I was also afraid could it affect me getting a job down the road that I’m like I have a blemish on me. So I really didn’t want to share my story or get into the stroke awareness area.
Stacy 24:48
But I went to an event that a friend dragged me to because I think she saw I was struggling where there were other women stroke survivors heart attack survivors. And I stood in the corner and didn’t want to talk to any of them stood there. And then one by one, they started sharing their story and talking to me.
Stacy 25:07
And then it was kind of like my eye opening moment I shared my story, the tears are flowing. It’s like, it was like the moment I started to heal. And I thought, you know what, I can do some good with this. And this is what I’m going to do.
Stacy 25:20
So I don’t know if in some way, if it was, Hey, this is going you can help other people and do something with this, which I certainly hope through the work I’ve done over the past several years that I have been able to help people.
Bill 25:33
Yeah, I think you have. So Curiously, though, I want to try and take you back in in that time. Do you know when you’re doing that, why me? And you’re pissed off and you’re angry? At that time? When you’re doing the Why me? Is that making it any better? Or is it making your feelings worse? How is it impacting you when you’re doing the self, what’s the word?
Bill 26:00
Like, when you’re feeling sorry for yourself? Is that helping you? Or not? Does that make it worse? Is it harder to break out of that? What’s going on in your head? Because I never really did the Why me? So I don’t get why people do it. And I’m not saying they should or shouldn’t I’m just don’t get it? How does it play out?
Stacy 26:20
I think it was part of my. Because no matter what I changed as a person, the moment that happened, I think was part of my grieving process. I think I needed to go through the Why me blah, blah, blah.
Stacy 26:33
And to get to where I was today, I really think that was part of my because kind of grieving the old me because I am much different than the person I was before that. And I like I’m much happier with the person I am today.
Stacy 26:47
But I think that was part of my my grieving process. And maybe a way, I don’t know, some weird way of dealing with the stress. I mean, I was I was a mess. I tried a therapist, and the guy just kept going back to my childhood. I’m like, dude, I almost died. That’s what I need to deal with right now.
Stacy 27:04
Past whatever I need to deal with. The fact is, I almost died and why am I here. And I struggled with that just trying to find the right person to talk to and help me and actually ended up finding a personal coach, who I don’t know, he just ended up connecting with me and really helped me kind of process everything that had happened to me, coaches are different.
Bill 27:23
So counselors are really important. I went to see a counselor as well. But I’ve had coaches, I’m a coach, as well. So coaches are different, because they deal with helping you solve that little problem that you have right now the one How do I get over this? How do I get better or whatever.
Bill 27:39
And it’s supposedly focusing, you want that task. And that sometimes is the trigger for people to then go back and deal with the emotional trauma that psychologists want you to deal with, which is really important as well.
Bill 27:53
It’s why I call stroke has three pillars to recovery, it has the physical, which gets the most work, and then it gets mental gets some of the work. And then the emotional hardly ever gets any work done to it right?
Bill 28:08
So they’re the three pillars of stroke recovery. And if you neglect one of them, well, your recovery is not going to be the fullest. Son I think if you get the order, right, you try it out one way, and the order was wrong.
Bill 28:21
But for you it needed to start with right here right now. I nearly died, how do I deal with the anger and get over that you’ve done that. And then your your counselor say you go back to your counselor can deal with some of that emotional stuff from the past, which is what I dealt with.
Bill 28:38
And that made me create better relationships with the people that I wanted to heal my relationships with mom and dad, not that I had bad relationships with them. I just felt like if I craved it, they maybe I didn’t say I love you enough.
Bill 28:53
Or maybe I didn’t get over their shortfalls or, you know, and my brother and my kids and all that kind of stuff. So dealt with the coaching, dealt with psychology, and also then did the physical work just as part and parcel of the recovery from hospital. So that’s why I think a lot of people get a lot of results with coaches because coaches don’t give a shit about your past much.
Bill 29:17
They just care about what you want to achieve right now. It’s like a tennis coach, you know, he wants to make sure you get the ball into the net. Not into the net above the net on the other side of the court. That’s all.
Stacy 29:32
Exactly.
Bill 29:33
So how long did it take you to get over yourself?
Road To Recovery And Finding Purpose
Stacy 29:40
You know, gosh, I mean, I still have moments right? But um, I would say it was a good two years, a good two years and I think when I started the volunteering and sharing my story and using it to make a difference was when things got a lot better for me.
Stacy 30:00
Although there is a flip side to that, because reliving the worst moment of your life and retelling your story, it’s not an easy thing to do if I learned that first starting out, but it got a little easier over time, but I still choke up, I would still It depends, like, I could tell my story, and I could cry. It just depends where I am emotionally.
Stacy 30:20
But I’ll say it, you know, it really was a good two years, and I still to this day have like, I like had my moments. And I think I’m always fearing. So I miss symptoms of something before. And now I felt like afterwards, I was a little overly too much. It was like, Oh, my gosh, I got a headache.
Stacy 30:38
Like, I started panicking with everything. I’m much better about that. But I’m also I’m more aware of my body. And with these doctors, I asked the questions, I do my research, and I advocate for myself, which I probably should have done with those two other doctors, but I didn’t know any better.
Bill 30:54
Yeah, you don’t know how to you know, you’ve never been in that situation before. You’re not a stroke expert. If you’re a person who just had something happened to them. I mean, how do you supposed to kmow? I had, I had episodes on stage where I’ve fully broken out in tears, and had to take moments, you know, plenty of time to compose myself and get back to the story. But you know what that does, that just makes the audience gets sucked in for you even more, they just love you even more after that.
Stacy 31:24
It It keeps it real. It’s my real emotions. It’s It’s my story. And it’s, you know, it’s something that’s very close to my heart that I share with people.
Bill 31:34
Yeah. And I’m the same I’ve been, you know, nine years down this path. And I was at a party. I think I mentioned this on a previous podcast episode as well. I was at a party. A friend of mine, one of my most amazing friends is a female. And she has a group of friends that she hangs out with, she calls the soul sisters.
Bill 31:56
And it was her birthday, and she decided to have this birthday party. But her other friend, one of her soul sisters decided to organize the party on her behalf. And it wasn’t a surprise party, but she did all the organization or the planning for it. And Robin asked Louise, how many you know, who would you like to invite?
Bill 32:18
And Louise said, my soul sisters and Bill, right? So I went to this party is 11 other females, my wife included in me, right? And it was a real strange place for me to find myself in Normally, you know, there’s men and there’s talk about football and all this rubbish. But this is a really emotionally heavy party.
Bill 32:41
And just from a loving, kind, girly kind of space. Right was really cool. So I found myself in conversations with women, who I’ve done plenty of times before. But this one particular lady came to sit next to me she started asking me questions. I was crying for about an hour solid. I couldn’t get a bloody word out.
Bill 33:01
I was just in tears. I was whatever. But of course, I was in the perfect group of people because they don’t care. Girls love it, you know, and they were supportive. And they were hugging and they were telling me all these things and it was a really lovely way to just find without knowing it was the perfect time to express myself and get another layer of trauma or something off my chest. Is that how you feel it? Do you kind of feel that as these layers coming off?
Stacy 33:32
Yeah, it’s somewhat therapeutic. I mean, I feel like I mean, I can get through my story now pretty good without, but it just depends where I am or if there are other people speaking about their stories and their survival. But yeah, there is something about that. And I was really lucky that I found this group of women who all have one thing in common they survived these health crisis’s.
Stacy 33:59
And when I was talking with them, and they were so brave and sharing, I’m like, what’s my problem? Like they and they had I mean, I’ll say a lot of them had much worse stories. I mean, being you know, being revived, actually dying and being brought back to life. And I’m like, what’s my problem? I mean, it wasn’t that bad compared to this. So yeah, definitely.
Bill 34:20
Yeah. Sometimes comparisons healthy, isn’t it? How old were you? I was 41. Yeah.
Stacy 34:29
41
Bill 34:31
It’s too young. I hear you know, there’s so many people and then you hear children had strokes and all this stuff. And it’s like, everybody’s too young. There’s no such thing as if you’re about the right age to have a stroke or the right age to nearly die. There’s no such thing is there? It doesn’t matter how old you are.
Bill 34:50
So when you’re at your worst, like what’s working for you and what’s not working for you sometimes people We’ll go through this cycle of being into a little bit of a low spot. What did you find? Or reflecting back now? What do you notice wasn’t working for you, with regards to the way that you were trying to move forward?
Taking Time To Heal After A Carotid Artery Dissection
Stacy 35:17
What wasn’t working for me, I don’t? Well, I think the one advice I’d give is, you know, give yourself the time to heal. Jumping back to work was a big mistake, I had a stressful job. And adding to that was just not that much better. So I think that that was something I really learned. Um, and I think you can’t over expect too much from people, like we discussed, people are going to react to you differently.
Stacy 35:43
And that’s just their way, it doesn’t mean that they don’t care. But a lot of people just don’t know what to do with that when something like that happens to you. So I think that that’s something really important. And I think, you know, I just, I think I put too much stress on myself to get back to where I was not knowing that I never really will be back to where I was like, is different.
Stacy 36:08
But I just think I kept putting pressure on, I can still do all this I’m going to do, I just don’t think I just wanted normalcy. And it was never going to be the way normal was before. And I wish I would have known that and giving myself more time to heal more time to recover rather than rushing back into the life that I used to have.
Bill 36:27
Isn’t it interesting? A lot of people do say to me, I just want to get back to life before the stroke. And it’s like, dude, the life you had before the stroke, led to a stroke? That’s the last thing you want to get back to you want to understand how you got there and tweak it so that you don’t go back there again.
Bill 36:49
That’s what I would encourage you to do. And it’s really strange when you hear that, but it is the first instinct. It’s like, Oh, actually, you know, I even me it was like, if I just go back there, everything would have been because I hadn’t had a stroke yet. I’ll still at work are still making money. You’re still doing this. I was still doing that. But really, it was just that moment before everything turned bad.
Stacy 37:15
Oh, absolutely. I mean, I was working. I think the who recently came out with a study that people that work more than was 55 hours a week have a 35% chance of having a stroke. I mean, I was like one of those people, it was like, Oh, I’m gonna commute three hours, I’m gonna work 12 hours a day.
Stacy 37:31
And, you know, I look back. And what good did that do me, like, at the end of the day Bill, if I would have dropped dead, they would have replaced me and other person would have taken the job. Like, that’s a hard thing to start to get through your head. But I think there’s a way to do a good job and work really hard. Without going to that extreme.
Bill 37:52
Yeah. A friend of mine said that to me many, many years before my stroke, but he described it a little bit differently. He said, You’re on a bridge, and the traffic is backed up for many miles. And there’s cars everywhere, you can’t move, and just some how a crane comes over and picks up your car and just gets rid of it and puts it away.
Bill 38:16
Anyone going to notice the difference? Is it going to change anything? And I was like no. And it was his way of trying to make me understand that I’m not as important as I think I am like, pull your head in and just settle down and just take it easy and enjoy what’s happening right now.
Bill 38:32
Because no one’s gonna notice you’re gone in a global scale. No, it’s not gonna really make a difference. So that’s a really hard lesson it is it’s a hard thing to comprehend and then to then take action. Okay, so what does that now mean? What am I supposed to do with that information?
Bill 38:51
Well, here we are, unfortunately, both of us down the track, we had to have this dramatic thing happened. And now with that information, we’re going okay, now’s the time to reflect and change some things and do something different now. What are the some of the things that you changed?
Stacy 39:08
So I definitely I think, well, one, I’m extremely I’m more grateful person, like, I don’t think I appreciated half the stuff that I did before this happened to me. And that’s unfortunate that it took almost dying to realize, well, you know, these things are really important. With work, I work extremely hard, but I’m not going to throw myself into the tailspin of like it’s constant constant. I won’t do it because I somehow think that had something to do with my situation.
Stacy 39:44
So I have to kind of set boundaries which is really hard for someone like me, I’m a type A personality, I want to do everything but I just can’t and I have to realize that I think I take more time for myself to rest before all of this I I wasn’t sleeping that much, maybe five hours a night or so I really take the time to rest.
Stacy 40:06
And I have to because my body now tells me when I’m not, because that my headaches will come back. And that’s kind of my body saying, Stacy, you overdid it, you need to take to scale it back. And I will make sure that I take that time to scale back because my body is definitely telling me that, what else? I mean, the volunteers have changed for me.
Stacy 40:29
You know, I’m embarrassed to say I didn’t get back to my community. Before all of this. I never thought about that. Like that wasn’t you know, I’m working. I’m doing this. And I’ll have to say, the volunteer work that I’ve done. And the people that I’ve met have been one of my greatest gifts in life. And it took this for me to get it. But I am so grateful for that. And that’s been one of the bright spots of all of this.
Bill 40:53
Yeah. And what about physically and moving around, exercise that kind of thing. Have you gone back to the gym?
Stacy 41:01
I have gone back to the gym, I love the gym. But I have restrictions. So like I can’t lift heavy weight over my head, I have certain weight limitations. I can’t do yoga, I can’t play at plank. Basically, I can’t do anything that’s going to put pressure on my neck because I still live with the 40% blockage and the bad artery.
Stacy 41:20
I have a small pseudoaneurysm that we have been stable and we don’t want it to do anything because that would not be good. So and you know, I can’t skydive, I can’t go on a rollercoaster. But honestly, that stuff that I didn’t really care about before. So I’m a little mad about some of the restrictions at the gym, because I really like to go at it hardcore. But you know, my doctors gave me the instructions. And I followed them.
Bill 41:47
Doctors giving instructions to type A personalities, and then just seeing their brain, just go.
Stacy 41:55
Oh, I’ve been lucky. My doctor has been an amazing partner and all of this and reviews my presentations from medical perspective. And I have to say, you know, I’ve had some scares in the past five years. And he has gotten back to me right away. And we’ve done what we needed to do, just to kind of check on things. So I’m grateful that I’ve really had such I’ve had such great care. Once I got past the people that might have misdiagnosed me I got to the right people.
My Stroke Of Hope
Bill 42:21
Yeah. On Insta, your Insta page is My Stroke of Hope? What’s all that about? What Why do you do that for?
Stacy 42:34
You know, I feel like my stroke of hope was something that that gave me hope in terms that I can help survivors and I can help caregivers. So I kind of say it is it is my stroke of hope. It’s something that gave me hope. And I hope it’s something that can give others
Bill 42:52
Well, why do you do it?
Stacy 42:54
Why do I do it? Um, because I want to help people, I don’t want people to go through what I went through, I want them to recognize stroke symptoms right away. I mean, Bill had I known my blockage probably wouldn’t have gotten the 90% if I gotten help right away, my artery probably would have healed I wouldn’t have gotten the pseudo aneurysm.
Stacy 43:15
And, you know, I was moments away from what could have been either a life changing or life ending situation. So I don’t want anyone to go through what I went through. And I’ve always said, If I could help one person, it would all be worth it. And recently, I was speaking in an event and someone heard me go over stroke symptoms.
Stacy 43:34
And a couple days later, they got a phone call. And they said so and so sounds like they’re drunk on the phone. And he’s like, Well, that doesn’t kind of seem like that person. You know, call them back and ask him these questions, call them back. He, didn’t really have any of those symptoms, but he had a bit of slurred speech, and they called an ambulance and got it to the guy’s house and he was having a stroke.
Stacy 43:56
So hey, that guy knew that because I gave those symptoms. So I’ve helped my one person. That’s all I wanted, but I’m not done. I’m not done by any means I have more work to do. But that’s why I did this. So I at least know of one person that I’ve helped and that makes it all worth it.
Bill 44:13
Stacy Quinn. I love you. Oh my god. That’s why we do it. That’s it. That’s why we do it. Right. It’s exactly why you do it. You didn’t know that that was going to happen. you hoped for it. And now every other person after that’s going to be a bonus. What an amazing bonus.
Stacy 44:30
Yeah, I was like when I heard the person tell me that I started to cry. And I was like, you know, I’m gonna get emotional now. But that’s why I’ve done all of this and like I’ve spent my free time I just wanted to know that I could help one person from going through something and thankfully the guy’s okay and is recovering. And that is that’s made it all worth it.
Bill 44:51
That’s beautiful. That’s, that’s it. I love it. I am so glad to hear that. I mean, I hear that every day but it just doesn’t stop making me feel amazing and I start getting, you know, the hair on my neck standing up and I started to feel off warm and fuzzy inside. And that’s it.
Bill 45:07
That’s exactly why you do it and you have made a difference. And that is part of the recovery, isn’t it? Isn’t that part of the recovery, such an important part? Who would have thought that Stacey Quinn type A personality worked 24 hours a day, seven days a week, one day was gonna make it about somebody else. Really?
Stacy 45:29
Yeah. So yeah, that’s, I think that’s why I do it. I mean, I also raise money for research, I think that’s really important. Because without research, I don’t think those doctors would have known what to do with me, because carotid artery dissection is like, every major hospital from my doctor says they only see about five a year, although I think it’s a lot higher, and people are misdiagnosed. But um, without that I wouldn’t have gotten the treatment I had. So the research part is also something I’m passionate about helping with.
Bill 45:57
Well. So how do you raise money? What are specific ways that people can help out? Or is it just through the events that you do?
Stacy 46:07
So, in the US, the American Heart Association, American Stroke Association, I’m on the local board here. So I recently did a campaign for cycle nations. So it’s about riding your bike raising stroke awareness and raising funds. So I did that, you know, we every year we have something it’s called Go Red For Women.
Stacy 46:29
And it raises awareness about stroke and heart disease and women. So I chaired the launching a few years ago to raise money for that. So it’s, it’s primarily through the events that I do through the organization that I support.
Bill 46:41
Yeah, awesome. So I know there’s Go Red For Women. What about the men?
Stacy 46:45
Well, we don’t have there isn’t a specific organization for the men part that falls with I guess, within the American Stroke Association.
Bill 46:56
Yeah. Isn’t it interesting, and I didn’t say that to make you feel bad that, you’re not helping you’re obviously are, I say that, because most of the people that I interview are women, most of the people who have causes like this are women. There’s some amazing men that are involved in my community that are online, and all that kind of stuff that are doing great work.
Bill 47:17
But there’s not a lot of proactive men out there supporting themselves. In this way, maybe they’re doing it in other ways that I’m not aware of. But I find, and even the presentations that I did in the times I spoke publicly, there’s hardly ever any men in the room, it’s always women. And I don’t understand that, like, it’s really strange and bizarre. I know that men go through just as much stuff that women do, but they’re not there.
Stacy 47:46
Yeah, and we’ve, you know, we’ve done a lot to try to get men involved as well, because, you know, women have strokes, heart, attack. And it’s also important for them to recognize the sign so they could help their mother, sister daughter, as well. So we’ve tried some initiatives, also to get more and more men involved in that, because it is really important.
Bill 48:08
You have to get a baseball player or football player at that event and tell them they’re coming there to see a baseball guy.
Stacy 48:15
That didn’t work.
Bill 48:21
I know, it’s a very interesting theme that’s being that I’ve seen for many, many years now. And I always sort of say that, and I even do a presentation at a university here locally. And I share my story. And it’s a third-year occupational therapy students. So they’re going into occupational therapy, practical lessons the following year.
Bill 48:42
Where they’ll be working with patients, I imagine. And even in those rooms, the majority of the people are women, and the men are few and far between. So I always joke with them. And I always tell the two guys in a room of 20 women that they chose, well, you know that they’re very, very smart for being there.
Bill 49:04
So that’s kind of what you get. It’s an interesting thing, for me is when I find a really caring, supportive guy, it’s a very next level, amazing feeling for me, I can’t relate to enough men that do that. And when I get somebody like that, it really impacts me, personally, more deeply, because I don’t know that’s just something about men helping men is just very different.
Bill 49:33
And I think we miss it. And I really think we miss it because we’re not brave enough to put ourselves out there because you know, we have to not cry. We have to be tough. We have to overcome everything. So yeah, it’s really interesting part of recovery that I’ve been missing on being missing like connecting with men.
Bill 49:55
So when I get it online, I get really excited.
Stacy 50:00
We have a pretty big following.
Bill 50:01
So yeah, it’s getting there. And a lot of guys that do interact but far outnumbered by the women. And I don’t know, there are a lot of men’s organizations doing good work, and they are breaking down some of those barriers, it’s just really hard for me to understand what would make a man want to interact.
Bill 50:27
Whereas with me, I just had to, I didn’t think about it, I didn’t worry about all the stuff, I’ve got to pretend I’m not. I just, I had to do this. Like, I just couldn’t not I was missing, and I needed it to help the healing. So what I’m saying this maybe because there is are some men listening who haven’t stepped up and haven’t gone out of their way to seek help or to be part of a community. And maybe they’re listening, and they’re going, alright, maybe Bill’s giving me permission to maybe I can do this now.
Bill’s Upcoming Book
Stacy 50:58
Absolutely. Maybe, I know. You have a book you’re working on maybe that I don’t know if that’s part of it.
Bill 51:04
Yeah, it’s all part of it. The book that I’m thinking of is, yeah, I won’t reveal the name of it at all. But yeah, it is about that. It’s about actually breaking the barriers of all these supposedly things that not only men, but that we’re not supposed to do, because society said we shouldn’t do or whatever.
Bill 51:27
And I think we get diverted away from the real way, we need to go about our own lives by all the noise that happens around US media, advertising, you know, all the marketing things that are diverting us and telling us to go to work for 36 hours a day, and all that type of thing.
Bill 51:47
So I just want to bring it back to the basics. And that’s what the books gonna be about. It’s guys, all you got to do is the basic stuff. And if you can get out of your head, really. And stop overthinking things, and just go back to basics, you’ll have a much more fulfilled life much more amazing life. I complicated my life by doing this podcast.
Bill 52:10
But for me, this was a back-to-basics step because I needed a community that I didn’t have an ear. The only way to get it was to learn all these million things about how to get a podcast live. And once I got it live, I found the community because in my neighborhood, there’s just there isn’t an abundance of stroke survivors, they want to go hang out at the local cafe with the local pub and around the world. Apparently they do. So that’s why.
Stacy 52:38
It is amazing the people that I have a great person I connected with what a carotid artery dissection in Israel, a woman in Ireland like, it’s amazing the community that you develop through through social media and the people that you connect with and how much you have in common with them and their miles and miles away. And I’ve met some really great people.
Bill 53:00
Yeah. Have you met Clodah Dunlop?
Stacy 53:05
I don’t think so.
Bill 53:06
So Clodah was on my podcast as well. I’ll tell you the episode number while we’re chatting. I’ll scroll through and find it and Clodah was a police officer, she was involved in a very minor collision. And in that collision, she experienced some whiplash, and then a headache.
Bill 53:26
And then all the things that you’ve described. And what that collision created a dissection. And eventually she ended up in hospital and got treated, she woke up in locked-in syndrome. So she’s able to basically just blink us our eyes and blink. And that was the only way she could communicate.
Bill 53:56
So I interviewed her for Episode 38 way back at the beginning. And she’s a really cool person because she talked about how she used to go into potential sites where maybe, you know, the local terrorist group had set up bombs and that kind of stuff. She was working at that level.
Bill 54:17
And then she says, and a little minor collision in a vehicle caused her to be wiped out. So she’s an amazing lady. She’s great online. I’ll share the link of her Instagram feed as well and the link to the episode. It’ll be in the show notes. But I’ll send it to you personally.
Bill 54:35
You’re going to really connect with her. She’s amazing.
Stacy 54:38
Thank you. I look forward to that.
Bill 54:40
Yeah. And after being locked in and not being able to move or walk or any of that stuff. She eventually went back to work and now she’s back as a police officer. And I’m pretty sure she’s a detective now and she’s going around, doing amazing things.
Stacy 54:58
That’s inspirational.
Bill 55:00
That’s That’s it. That’s why we do this right. That’s why we share our story to inspire others who are listening that maybe as time passes and plenty of healing happens, you can get to the other side, right, which is back to life some way, shape or form.
Stacy 55:14
Absolutely. You just don’t think it when you’re in it at the time, but that’s exactly.
Bill 55:18
It’s hard, isn’t it? You’ve been going through this now for what, six or seven years? So I imagine there was a real lot of low moments as well. Were there times when you had really difficult days, you thinking all the worst things you could possibly think?
Stacy 55:37
Yeah, I think so. Especially in like the first I’d say six months, we’re just like, I just, I had so many sick, I just didn’t, I had so many symptoms that people like you wouldn’t even like realize. And I’m like, do I want to live like this? Like I did have moments where I thought if this is life, I I’m grateful to be here, but I’m not 100% sure that it can live with an ongoing headache.
Stacy 56:03
I can live with my neck pain. I’m dizzy, I’m nauseous, like, Is it ever going to go away? And it does, it gets better. But at first you’re thinking, if this is the new norm, I don’t want to be. I don’t want to I don’t want to do this. So I did have some moments like that where I was like, I’m not sure I want this.
Bill 56:19
Yeah. What are you living with has left you with some deficits and things I know, sometimes you get tired and your body tells you when you need to rest. But is there other things that it’s left you with?
Stacy 56:31
I think you know, really, like the tiredness and I still I still get the headaches. I cannot I’ve had trouble connecting. Like if you say right, I got to really think about it. You say laughs I got it. And I usually go the opposite.
Stacy 56:46
But I’ve been working out with my with through my personal trainer and doing the stuff I’ve gotten a lot better. And I had a breakthrough actually two Saturdays ago where he told me to do it. I didn’t even think about it. It just happened. And I was like, Oh my gosh, I usually I’ve got to pause and I really have to think hard about it.
Stacy 57:02
And I avoided taking group fitness classes because of that, because I was embarrassed, I couldn’t do it. But during the pandemic, when we locked down, the only option to work out I had at the gym was they were doing outside classes, and I thought I couldn’t do it. I don’t know.
Stacy 57:17
And then I said, you know what I got to get out of the house, I’m gonna go do it. And that was one of my, one of my happy moments in the pandemic was it forced me to go out do something uncomfortable? And I was like, Oh, no, these people it’s fine. If I mess it up. And then it’s really helped my brain get that back. So I still have my moments, but it’s definitely I had my breakthrough. And it’s definitely better.
Bill 57:39
Yeah, interesting that thing, where, where and where you tell me to write that down one of those words in the correct context, I have to think about it. And on another piece of paper, I have to write all the different ways and try and understand which were to apply to the way to the appropriate way. I mean, it’s ridiculous. But it happens all the time. I can’t. I’ve never been able to just write the correct way. And now it’s the right one. I’ve just, I struggle with it.
Stacy 58:07
It’s crazy, because like my left and right, used to be quick with it. And then I’m like, wait, and then by the time I figured it out, the instructors gone on extra size. So but it’s definitely gotten better. And it was interesting. My eyesight afterwards was messed up because I had I guess a bunch of blood vessels were messed up.
Stacy 58:29
And I had to go to a neuro-ophthalmologist and you know, my blood vessels grew back and my eyesight got better. The human body is amazing, though. I was like, because when I went back for the test, he’s like, yeah, your eyes are pretty much repaired themselves. So again, being in good shape when something like that happens does benefit because my body did repair a lot of the issues I had.
Bill 58:51
What sort of work were you doing beforehand? And what are you doing now?
Stacy 58:55
So I worked in financial services for a global asset manager in Communications Group, I, I decided I really like that job. But when I let myself recover, and then I took a step back and I said, I can’t keep up this pace. This isn’t going to be healthy for me in the long term.
Stacy 59:17
So I ended up going back to where I didn’t have to commute an hour a day to finding a job a bit closer to home. in health care, and that’s that’s where I’ve been so I love that job. But I knew for my own well being it probably wasn’t something I could keep up with for the long term. So that was also a hard part of something that I had to determine was like, I have to leave this job. I can’t do an hour and 15 minute commute each way. Work these hours and sustain my life.
Bill 59:47
Yeah. Not enough downtime.
Stacy 59:50
No, not at all.
Bill 59:52
So what do you love to do now for downtime? What do you do?
Stacy 59:55
Well, it’s been a little hard in the past 14 months because of the pandemic. But you know, I really love I love working out. going to the gym is one of my favorite things to do. And I love shoes, a shoe shop. I’ve been very nice collection that I have not been able to wear in 14 months. Actually. I have red heels that I put on to do this just because I was like I gotta wear them somewhere. Oh I took them off actually they’re in the back.
Stacy 59:58
The girls the ladies watching me to see them show us show us the red shoes. Wow, they are impressive.
Stacy 1:00:42
Yeah, and I can still I’m amazed 14 months in a pandemic. I can still wear these I can still rock them. So I was I was a little nervous like am I gonna be able to wear them so I can so I love my shoes and now that things are opening back up. I look forward to to wearing them again. And then we talked about I spend a lot of my free time doing volunteer work.
Bill 1:01:02
Yeah. So are you addicted to shoes? Is that what it is that addiction?
Stacy 1:01:07
Well, I have 250 pairs. So yeah. I was like when they gave me the restrictions after my dissection I was like as long as you don’t say I can’t if you say I can’t you shop it’s over. But you know, I can I can get away with not going on a roller coaster.
Bill 1:01:24
Wow I am sure there’s gonna be some people here going. I can relate to this woman. Oh my gosh. Which are your favorite? Is there a favorite? Can you have favorite shoes?
Stacy 1:01:37
You know, I love all of them and all designers but I love it. I love a good stiletto like this. I like some height. So yeah, and I love like red is one of my favorite color.
Bill 1:01:50
Do you ever throw shoes out? Is there a pair of shoes that you’ve worn down completely that eventually had to get thrown out?
Stacy 1:01:58
Well, during lockdown when I cleaned out I got rid of about 10 pair that I was like and you know, and honestly, I didn’t even know I had them. It’s been so long. They were kind of dated. So yeah, I did I do clean out.
Bill 1:02:10
Clean out to make space for the next period.
Stacy 1:02:13
Yeah, things are opening. The shoe stores are open again. I got to get out there, Bill.
Bill 1:02:19
Well, that’s if that’s your only advice. It sounds like it’s your own advice. Wow, that’s not too bad.
Stacy 1:02:26
Now, it’s fun. I enjoy I I missed that. Because I’ve been working for home for the past 14 months, I miss getting dressed up and going to work and seeing people so hopefully we’ll return to that soon.
Bill 1:02:37
That’s a really interesting part of recovery, I think that you said is that being out of the house dressed up feet, you know, feeling the air on your face, you know, the sun, and all that kind of stuff? Are you just as comfortable in your sweats or whatever comfy items of clothing that you wear as you are when you go out and about like was that something that you needed to do that really helped you?
Bill 1:03:06
Because I found that the more I spent time out, the more I put a bit of effort into shower and shave and put a nice, clean shirt on instead of T shirt and sweat pants, you know, I felt better. And I know I looked in the mirror and kind of thought, okay, you know, you’re right. We’re doing all right. You know, I did these things. Was that something that was important for you?
Stacy 1:03:31
Oh, absolutely. I mean, I’m someone that’s known for like my dresses and my shoes and like I coordinate everything. So yeah, it just made me feel so much better to be I mean, that’s, that’s a bit of my personality. That’s who I am. And I you know, I think getting dressed up and like that also gives you just so much. I don’t know, I feel more confident when I know I feel comfortable. And I look good.
Bill 1:03:54
Yeah. Did you ever worry about your work? Potentially saying, we haven’t got a position for you? There’s no room for you here anymore. Now that you’ve had this thing happen to you?
Stacy 1:04:09
That’s so the job that I had at the time. They were extremely supportive. I will say like they were very good to me. So there No, but I was afraid about when I left getting another job knowing that my social media talks about my stroke like I post up on LinkedIn about what I do.
This Is Who I Am
Stacy 1:04:30
That’s where I really hesitated when I got involved with volunteerism, but then I said, You know what, this is who I am. And if you don’t want me to work for you, then that’s fine because you know what I feel like I’ve done pretty well-considering everything that I’ve been through. And I would hope that someone would look at that as a benefit to me and working for them. So I eventually said you know what, this is who I am and if you don’t like it, then don’t hire me.
Bill 1:04:54
Yeah, this is not my coaching, strokes survivors and the podcast is not my full-time gig yet, it’s hopefully going to be one day. But I definitely have had people tell me that they’ve Google searched me, because I have a property maintenance business as well. So that’s been happening since 2005.
Bill 1:05:18
So it’s the way that I’ve made a living for all these years, and it’s the job I was doing when I became really unwell. And my clients will search for me on Google to confirm, you know, who is this guy? Is there any warrants out for his arrest? You know, why am I bringing this guy into my house? You know, so people have the power to do that now, right?
Bill 1:05:40
And they find these things, so some people, for some people, it’s been the reason to have me at the house. And for some people who, when I’ve applied for jobs, in the past, were all started to get back on my feet, they definitely used it against me, they definitely used it as a way to convince themselves that maybe we need to go with somebody else. Now, they didn’t say that to me. And I kind of understand, but now that I’m so public, and there’s so much of me online, there’s no way that I can take it down, like it’s there forever.
Stacy 1:06:19
You know, what, and that’s who you are. So they don’t like it like, then you wouldn’t want to be part of a group like an organization like that. That’s how I feel.
Bill 1:06:28
Yeah, so that’s where it is at. So I’ve do find that a few people that I’ve spoken to have struggled to get convinced their bosses to allow them to come back to work in a different capacity and ease their way in and one lady in particular, she was working in a hospital.
Bill 1:06:48
And of all places where you would have thought that they would support somebody being unwell to get back to work, you would have thought a hospital would be the place but apparently not.
Stacy 1:07:00
That’s crazy.
Bill 1:07:02
Yeah. So then she found another job in a similar role in another organization, I think it was another hospital. But the stigma, the challenges that we all face, still are there. And the person who rejected this young lady to go back to her own job, her old job is going to be sick one day in the future, unfortunately.
Bill 1:07:26
And she’s gonna want somebody to step up for her and for somebody to help her out in her hour of need. And it’s not her fault, but we’re all so narrow minded, that we can’t see beyond their own challenges and issues. And some of us just don’t understand that this person needs our help, we need to help them and then we might also need help in the future. And then what are we going to do when no one steps up for us?
Stacy 1:08:00
And that it’s, yeah, and I’m sure I mean, I would have no way of knowing if that really happened to me, right? If someone looked and said, Oh, I Google’s or you know, we’re not going to bring her in for an interview. Like, I have no idea of knowing if that even happens, but I’m okay with that. I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished. And the work that I’ve done so far, and I have a lot more to do. And if you don’t want me, that’s fine.
Bill 1:08:20
Yeah. hey, where can people find out more about you? I know we briefly spoke about your Insta, where else can they find out about you?
Stacy 1:08:31
Sure I have a website, wwwmystrokeofhope.com. I’m also on Instagram @mystrokeofhope. And I’m also on Twitter at my stroke of hope. So if you google mystrokeofhope hopefully you’ll find me.
Bill 1:08:46
I really appreciate you reaching out and connecting with me on Instagram. And I love the work that you’re doing. Thank you for everything that you do for the people in your community, and for making a difference. It’s really been fun to get to know you. I hope your recovery continues to go well, and I hope you continue to inspire lots of people.
Stacy 1:09:09
Oh, well, thank you so much. And Bill, thank you for everything that you do. You’re amazing and I will be first in line to get the book when it’s published.
Bill 1:09:17
Okay I better get on to it then.
Stacy 1:09:21
All right. Thank you Bill.
Intro 1:09:24
Discover how to heal your brain after stroke go to recoveryafterstroke.com. Importantly, we present many podcasts designed to give you an insight and understanding into the experiences of other individuals. The opinions and treatment protocols discussed during any podcast are the individual’s own experience and we do not necessarily share the same opinion nor do we recommend any treatment protocol discussed.
Intro 1:09:51
All content on this website at any linked blog, podcast or video material controlled this website or content is created and produced for informational purposes only and is largely based on the personal experience of Bill Gasiamis, the content is intended to complement your medical treatment and support healing. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice and should not be relied on as health advice.
Intro 1:10:14
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Intro 1:10:28
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Intro 1:10:53
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