David Willick on Life with Invisible Fatigue After Stroke

Post-Stroke Fatigue: Living With Exhaustion That Family Doesn’t Understand

When you meet someone who has had a stroke, you expect to see something.
A limp. A drooped smile. A visible clue.

What you often can’t see is the one thing that shapes their entire recovery: post-stroke fatigue.

For survivors like David Willick, fatigue wasn’t just tiredness — it was a complete rewiring of how his brain operated. And because nothing looked “wrong” from the outside, the exhaustion was misunderstood, dismissed, or invisible to everyone around him.

This is the part of stroke recovery that many people never talk about.
But for countless survivors, it becomes the most life-altering part of the journey.

What Post-Stroke Fatigue Really Feels Like

In the first weeks after his ischemic stroke, David slept for 44 out of 48 hours. Twice.

Not because he wanted to.
Not because he was lazy.
But because his brain was fighting to rewire itself at a level no one else could feel.

Post-stroke fatigue isn’t physical tiredness.
It’s neuro-fatigue — the deep brain exhaustion that follows even the simplest task.

For David, driving for ten minutes meant sleeping for hours.
A restaurant meal became overwhelming within 30 minutes.
Noise, light, background conversations — all of it flooded his brain faster than it could process.

Survivors often say:

“I look normal, but I’m exhausted inside.”

And that’s exactly what makes post-stroke fatigue so frustrating.
People don’t see it, so they don’t understand it.

Why Post-Stroke Fatigue Happens

After a stroke, the brain becomes like a construction site.
Damaged pathways collapse.
New ones must be built.
Old ones must be rerouted.
Simple tasks suddenly require manual mode instead of the automatic brain patterns that existed before.

David described driving after stroke like this:

• “I had to consciously think about braking.”
• “If I brake too softly, I’ll hit the truck ahead.”
• “If I brake too hard, I’ll get hit from behind.”
• “Where’s the noise coming from?”
• “Why is the windshield so bright?”

That’s one minute of mental processing… for something he had done automatically for decades.

This is what drains survivors.
Not weakness — but the intense cognitive load of rebuilding pathways.

The Part Survivors Struggle to Explain

One of the hardest parts of David’s recovery was convincing others he wasn’t alright.

“I looked normal,” he said, “but I was struggling more than ever.”

Post-stroke fatigue is invisible.
You can’t X-ray it.
You can’t bandage it.
You can’t show someone what light sensitivity feels like or what it’s like to suddenly forget where you parked your car.

When fatigue shows up, it looks like:

• turning down invitations
• leaving a restaurant early
• needing another nap
• feeling overwhelmed in a shopping centre
• struggling to keep up with conversations
• cancelling plans last minute

To friends and family, it can look like disinterest.
To survivors, it feels like survival.

One of the best things you can say to a survivor is:

“Whatever you’re feeling is valid… and I believe you.”

The Non-Linear Reality of Recovery

Every stroke survivor eventually discovers this:
Recovery is not a straight line.

David described it as a long-term stock market chart — trending upward, but filled with unpredictable rises and drops.

Two good days in a row don’t guarantee a third.
A setback doesn’t erase progress.
Your brain is always working, always rewiring, always adapting.

And fatigue can flare for reasons no one can pinpoint:

• overstimulation
• weather
• stress
• sleep changes
• doing too much the day before
• mental load
• emotional overwhelm

You can be “fine” one moment and overwhelmed the next.

This is the reality survivors live with.
And it doesn’t mean they’re failing.
It means their brain is healing.

How David Rebuilt His Energy and Identity

David didn’t just rebuild strength.
He rebuilt himself.

Here are the strategies that helped him navigate post-stroke fatigue and regain stability in his life:

1. Journaling the Little Wins

David tracked his improvements daily.
Not because he felt optimistic — but because depression and mental spirals made progress hard to see.

Reviewing weekly entries became proof that he was improving, even when he couldn’t see it in the moment.

“When I felt discouraged, I looked back at the journal and saw how much better I was than the week before.” — David

2. Respecting the Brain’s Need for Rest

He learned to respond to fatigue, not fight it.

Early on, if his brain said sleep, he slept.
If fatigue hit while walking, his wife spotted it instantly.
If his voice changed — softer, heavier — it became a signal that the day needed to slow down.

Rest wasn’t weakness.
Rest was medicine.

3. Gradual Return to Work

David went from:

• 6 hours per week
• to 12
• to 20
• to 30
• slowly back to full-time

At 20 hours per week, he almost quit — the fatigue was brutal.
But pushing in measured doses expanded his “ceiling” a little at a time.

This part of his recovery became one of the biggest catalysts for growth.

4. Redefining Success

Before the stroke, success for David was high performance, global work, and climbing the corporate ladder.

After the stroke?

Success became:

• peace
• health
• family
• meaningful work
• mentoring the next generation
• living with purpose

That shift transformed everything.

Advice for Survivors Facing Post-Stroke Fatigue

David’s message is simple and powerful:

“It’s going to be okay.”

You may not return to the person you were before — but you can grow into someone wiser, more self-aware, and more grounded.

Here’s what he wants every survivor to know:

• Recovery is possible.
• Fatigue doesn’t mean failure.
• You can improve for years.
• Rest is part of rehabilitation, not the opposite of it.
• Don’t compare your recovery to anyone else’s.
• Track your progress — your future self will thank you.
• Your mindset shapes every part of your healing.

And perhaps most importantly:

“You’re allowed to say no. You’re allowed to protect your energy.”

If You Love Someone Who’s Recovering From Stroke…

Understand that:

• They’re not faking the exhaustion.
• They’re not being dramatic.
• They’re not “overreacting.”
• They’re not trying to avoid you.

They’re trying to survive a neurological crash you can’t see.

Ask them gently:

“What do you need right now?”
“How can I make today easier for you?”
“Do you need rest?”

Support doesn’t fix fatigue, but it makes the journey human.

Next Steps for Your Own Recovery

If you’re dealing with fatigue, overwhelm, sensory overload or hidden deficits, I want you to know something:

You’re not alone — and recovery doesn’t end after rehab.

Here are two resources that can help:

• My book: The Unexpected Way That a Stroke Became the Best Thing That Happened — a practical guide to post-traumatic growth after stroke
  recoveryafterstroke.com/book
• Patreon:
  patreon.com/recoveryafterstroke

There’s a path forward.
There’s hope.
And your energy will rebuild — one small step at a time.

David Willick on Life with Invisible Fatigue After Stroke

Post-stroke fatigue can feel impossible to explain. David’s story reveals the hidden exhaustion behind recovery and how hope slowly returns.

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Highlights:

00:00 Introduction and Acknowledgments
06:37 The Discovery of PFO and Its Implications
09:20 The Day of the Stroke
11:16 Emergency Response and Delays
17:00 Initial Reactions and Miscommunication
25:23 Post-Stroke Fatigue and Recovery Challenges
27:28 Sensory Overload and Sensitivity
31:35 Emotional and Physical Challenges
37:01 The Journey of Recovery
41:13 The Impact of Memory Loss
48:10 Shifting Perspectives on Life
51:50 The Importance of Mentorship
01:00:14 Encouragement for New Survivors
01:11:46 Conclusion and Reflections

Transcript:

Introduction and Acknowledgments

Bill Gasiamis (00:00)
Before we get into today’s interview, I want to say thank you to everyone on Patreon who supports this show. You’re the reason I can keep creating this content after more than 10 years of doing it on my own. Your support helps cover hosting costs and keeps these conversations alive for the survivors out there who desperately need hope, clarity and community. I also want to take a moment to give a shout out to everyone who comments on YouTube, leaves reviews on Spotify or Apple, has bought the book

or simply tunes in without skipping the ads. You are helping stroke survivors feel less alone and that matters. Now today’s episode is a powerful one. I’m speaking with David Willick who experienced an ischemic stroke caused by a PFO, a hidden heart condition he never knew he had. What makes David’s story so important is that you can’t see the sensory overload, the extreme fatigue and the invisible deficits that shape his recovery.

If you’ve ever felt misunderstood because you look fine on the outside, but your brain tells a different story, this episode will resonate deeply. Let’s get into it. David Willick, welcome to the podcast.

David Willick (01:11)
I’m glad to be here. Thank you, Bill.

Bill Gasiamis (01:13)
David, what did a normal day look like for you before stroke?

David Willick (01:17)
Well, I had a global role in an internationally ⁓ recognized company. And I actually reported ⁓ into Australia from Canada. So I used to call some of my days bookend days because they would begin at 4.30, 5 o’clock in the morning and go for a few hours and then calm down a little bit.

and I would do my day job with my local people in my own time zone. And then right about 4.30, five o’clock in the evening, Australia would wake up and it would get super busy again well into the evening. And that was my day.

Bill Gasiamis (02:02)
Wow.

David Willick (02:02)
managing a large department and with lots of direct reports. So it was good, it was fun, but I thought it was Superman, I could do it all.

Bill Gasiamis (02:20)
And you probably did do it all for a little while.

David Willick (02:23)
for a little while.

Bill Gasiamis (02:25)
What industry was in?

David Willick (02:29)
It was in the electronics industry.

Bill Gasiamis (02:34)
So then the 4.30 start, was that just to get you going for the day? What was the 4.30 in the morning start all about?

David Willick (02:47)
Yeah, so what that was is working within the convenient time zones of the people that were in Australia. And so it wasn’t every day. It was ⁓ maybe once a week or twice a week, ⁓ but nevertheless. ⁓ And it was just over the years, it just became normal. And that’s just what you had to do. And you just rolled with it. So that was pre-stroke.

Bill Gasiamis (03:17)
What does the family life look like at that time?

David Willick (03:22)
You know, ⁓ we’re empty nesters, my wife and I, so, you know, and very ⁓ open and we did what we had to do. So when the kids were younger, the role wasn’t as demanding. And so I was able to have a fairly decent work-life balance ⁓ before that. But it was only really intense ⁓ for a couple of years before the stroke.

⁓ Prior to that, was less intense and therefore there was a fairly decent work-life balance ⁓ raising the kids to the point where they eventually left the nest.

Bill Gasiamis (04:01)
What were your goals, responsibilities or passions back then?

David Willick (04:07)
goals were, you know, family oriented, ⁓ you know, success oriented, ⁓ both success, you know, with, with home, but success with, ⁓ with, work as well and building a career and moving up the corporate ladder. and, ⁓ and my hobbies, you know, included, ⁓ doing stuff, sports, ⁓ woodworking, ⁓ you know, that type of thing.

Bill Gasiamis (04:37)
end of the interview, hopefully remind me if I’ve forgotten to ask you what success looks like now. I don’t want an answer now. I want an at the end because I imagine it will have changed just a little bit, but it’d be interesting to hear ⁓ what that is. So did you have a sense of your health back then? Did you have an idea of whether you ⁓ consider yourself healthy? Was there any signs of any ill health or potential challenges coming?

up.

The Discovery of PFO and Its Implications

David Willick (05:08)
No, there wasn’t. As a matter of fact, I would have annual executive physicals, ⁓ ate a great diet, I thought, you know, ⁓ fantastic, avoided, ⁓ you know, all of the taboo foods. ⁓ I had stopped drinking alcohol a few months before the stroke, because I just felt that it was the right thing to do. ⁓

new food guides introduced and not that I had a problem before, but it was just the new daily recommendations essentially were avoided if you can. And then, you know, as far as I had low blood pressure and borderline low, I had essentially low to normal cholesterol.

⁓ never smoked a day in my life, ⁓ anything. ⁓ and so, you know what I was, you know, after the stroke, when I was in the hospital, they said, you won the negative lottery. was like a one in a million chance you would have this. And cause you had no risk factors, ⁓ for that. And I’m not overweight. ⁓ you know, I’m in the same size pant that I was, ⁓ you know, finishing secondary school way back when.

And so, you know, it was just one of those things. And ⁓ in my case, it was, it ended up to be a PFO or a significant hole in my heart.

Bill Gasiamis (06:49)
Well, that will do it. Yeah. And one of those things can be there forever for some people and cause no challenges. then for some people, it then at some point does cause a problem. Did you have the PFO closed up?

David Willick (07:07)
I did. Unfortunately, it was after the stroke. ⁓ And so I had a catheter surgery, which is pretty amazing. You know, it was day surgery, right? And they, yeah, so you, I checked into the hospital at two o’clock in the afternoon, ⁓ did pre-op at 2.30. And essentially they, they put a camera up your vein in your arm.

And then the catheter with the device goes through the artery in your leg, in your groin area. And you’re completely awake during the whole thing. They’re asking you questions. And in my case, it was a pretty significant hole. So they said that the device that they used to cover the hole was 25 millimeters. ⁓ So pretty significant. And ⁓ they close it.

So it was interesting and I describe it to my friends that it was essentially like, you know, those fruity drink umbrellas that you get when you’re on vacation. It was essentially two of those going up through your groin. And the first one gets pushed through the hole, then gets inflated. And then the second one gets up to the other side of the hole.

and gets inflated and then they torque them down together and that plugs the hole.

Bill Gasiamis (08:35)
Wow, that is stunning.

David Willick (08:38)
And you know what? And then it is stunning. And so two o’clock check-in, pre-op to 30, procedure at about four or five o’clock, ⁓ post-op at about 6 p.m. They get you up walking around the ward of the hospital. If you can do one lap without bleeding, you’re good to go. And I was resting comfortably in my own bed by ⁓ 9 p.m. the same day it was done.

Bill Gasiamis (09:09)
That’s sensational. you know, years ago, maybe not that many years ago, that would have been an open chest procedure.

David Willick (09:18)
Exactly, it really was.

The Day of the Stroke

Bill Gasiamis (09:20)
That’s phenomenal. love how far technology science has come. It’s just brilliant that it can be like that. And to hear that, hopefully now the potential for another stroke has decreased even further.

David Willick (09:36)
Exactly. And so now that the PFO has been closed. So now that it’s been closed, they said my risk is decreased significantly.

Bill Gasiamis (09:47)
So on the day, what was the first sign that something wasn’t right?

David Willick (09:51)
You know, it happened in the evening ⁓ as I was sleeping. so first thing in the morning, we had a small dog at the time that required medication, that didn’t like the pill. And so I would open the capsule of his pill and put it in his food. And so normal day, I pick up the capsule because I’m right-handed with my right hand.

I went to take off the other side of the capsule with my left hand and I made three or four attempts at it. And I couldn’t line up my left hand to grab the other side of the capsule. So then I thought, well, that’s really, really odd. Eventually I got it, but it was multiple attempts. And then I decided, you know, let’s make a pot of coffee. And so I reached over for a plastic pitcher that we fill up with ⁓

with ⁓ water to fill the coffee pot and I dropped it. And I had no ⁓ sensation. I couldn’t detect how hard or how lightly I was squeezing the handle of the pitcher. So I dropped it. And after these two things happened, my wife was still sleeping at the time. I woke her up and I said, you know, something is not right. You know, get me to the hospital.

Emergency Response and Delays

Bill Gasiamis (11:16)
We’ll be back with more of David’s story in just a moment, but first I wanna take a moment to acknowledge something important. If what you’ve heard so far resonates, the fatigue, the sensory overload, the frustration of looking normal when you’re anything but, I want you to know that you’re not alone. David’s experience mirrors what so many stroke survivors go through every day. And the second half of this episode gets into how he rebuilds his energy.

reshaped his mindset and found stability again. But before we continue, I also want to take a moment to thank Banksia Tech for supporting this episode. They’re proud distributors of the Hanson Rehab Glove by Syrebo a soft robotic glove designed to help stroke survivors improve hand function at home, whether you’re early in recovery or years into it. You’ll hear more about the glove later on. Also go to banksiatech.com.au

to find out more. So what went through your mind as it began to escalate? Can you get me to the doctor? A few minutes ago I could do these things with my hands, now I can’t. Was there anything going through your mind?

David Willick (12:27)
Yeah, at first what went through my mind was, know, did I pinch my neck as I was sleeping? Like, was it because it I felt fine, I was able to walk, I was able to move around, I had no paralysis at that time. In my face, I had no issues. And, you know, looking at it, you know, in 2020 hindsight, it was the beginning of the stroke, it wasn’t an actual stroke yet.

So it was a blood flow restriction. And so I was able to still move. ⁓ But it was, some blood was still getting through. It hadn’t fully ⁓ blocked yet.

Bill Gasiamis (13:13)
Okay, ambulance turns up. ⁓

David Willick (13:16)
No, we actually, we were living in a very remote area. And so we didn’t call the ambulance. And this is where the story takes another turn for the worst. And so we didn’t call the ambulance because I still at this point thought it was just a pinched nerve or something like that. so anyway, so we, my wife drove me to the nearby hospital, which was about maybe a 35 minute drive.

But keep in mind, this is very remote, very almost primitive type of hospital. They were understaffed at this particular hospital. And they had substituted ⁓ the triage nurse with a ⁓ PSW, so just a personal support worker not trained in nursing or whatever.

And after this all happened, I had filed a formal complaint with the hospital and then I was able to get the report. And ⁓ what I learned from the report, didn’t know at the time, but she, the triage nurse, clicked the wrong button on her mouse. Instead of highest priority, she clicked lowest priority. And so I sat there for two and a half, three hours waiting

to be treated in the emergency room. And we kept going up to the nurse every 15, 20 minutes to the PSW. You know, some, this isn’t right. Something’s not right. Other people are coming in and out, other people. Anyway, so when I finally got to see the doctor, the doctor recognized the signs right away and ⁓ he ordered what they call a hot ambulance. So lights and sirens.

all the way to a larger center where they could confirm what type of stroke it was, ⁓ what was happening. So they didn’t have a CT scanner at the small remote hospital that we went to, but he needed the CT scan. I said, just give me the, the, the clock buster drug, ⁓ TPA. And he says, listen, if you’re having a hemorrhagic stroke, this is going to kill you. So I can’t just give it to

And so, but we’ll try to get you there as fast as possible. So guess what happened? I actually, ⁓ through the rural roads and bumping and grinding through in the ambulance on the way to the hospital, I had the stroke in the ambulance. So this is when the blood flow was completely ⁓ stopped to that portion of my brain. So it was the frontal lobe, right side.

⁓ And so by the time when my wife dropped me off at the small hospital and they told her not even, don’t even try to follow the ambulance because we’re going to be going full speed. So when she got and saw me at the larger center, she said, it was unbelievable. It was night and day. My face on the left side was completely drooped. ⁓ I had mobility issues on my left side.

You know, I was significantly worse because the stroke had occurred in the ambulance on the way. I had no sensation whatsoever on my left side. ⁓ The ambulance attendant that was with me, ⁓ you know, had this device. It looked like a sharpened pencil and he was sticking it at various different parts of my left side and I had no feeling whatsoever.

Initial Reactions and Miscommunication

Bill Gasiamis (17:00)
Yeah. Wow, man. I’ve been through all of those tests and all of those scary moments waiting for somebody to take action, to do something. Both from my perspective, I’ve done that to myself by delaying going to the hospital and also then after having an incident while at a hospital, ⁓ sitting on the chair in

⁓ emergency and waiting for somebody to see you is a difficult time. It is such a difficult time. ⁓ Were you, did you have any thoughts, any kind of like this can’t be happening moment? you, were you cognitively there enough to be able to do that?

David Willick (17:55)
Sorry, you froze there for a minute, Bill. Just repeat the question.

Bill Gasiamis (17:58)
Okay.

Yeah. Did you have any, this can’t be happening ⁓ thoughts in your head?

David Willick (18:07)
Yeah, I was floored. just, this can’t be happening. What the heck is going on? And then I’m negotiating at the larger center of, know, give me, give me TPA, give me the clot buster. And they said no, because, and of course it’s a completely different set of doctors. They said no, because you had this in the night and it was more than four hour window. And I said, no, no, I didn’t.

I said there was a restriction. I wasn’t like this. This only happened a half an hour ago. ⁓ But they wouldn’t give it to me. And so there was a little bit of miscommunication between the smaller center and the bigger center. But yeah, so it was disbelief. was how could this be happening? I have a healthy lifestyle. The only risk factor I had for a stroke was stress. ⁓ And everything else was ⁓ I didn’t have.

Bill Gasiamis (19:05)
Yeah. What were you afraid of most at the beginning?

David Willick (19:09)
deficits, right? ⁓ My ability to losing the ability to walk or to use my my hands, you know, physical impairments, cognitive impairments. I didn’t think of cognitive impairments back then. And when it first happened, I was just more focused on I don’t want to be left with any any physical deficits.

Bill Gasiamis (19:38)
Yeah, that’s fair enough. That’s probably how you recognize somebody that’s had a stroke. If you say physical deficits, it makes it quite obvious that person like that has had some kind of a neurological situation. ⁓ but then there’s the invisible deficits as well, which, you know, plague people after a stroke. who was it that first helped you make sense of what had happened? Were, did that take a little bit of time or?

How did you wrap your head around the situation that you found yourself in now?

David Willick (20:14)
Yeah, so ⁓ I was in the hospital for six days and getting CT scans and MRIs and meeting with the neurologist and the doctors there. And I was in the stroke ward, so there was other peers. ⁓ And then there was the ⁓ physical therapy and occupational therapy. ⁓

sessions that I would have. And so I guess the, you know, everybody was pleasant and nice, but then, you know, working with the neurologist at the hospital, I guess he was more the realist. And they said, Listen, sir, like, you know, I was a little bit making light of this, you know, it was, you know, I’m just gonna bounce back and I’m gonna be fine because the the

The loss of feeling and the complete loss of feeling on my left side only lasted, I would say, for about 36 hours. And then the feeling came back. But my deficit was fine motor skills ⁓ with my left hand. and so

I thought, you know, just another day or so and I’m going to get all those back, right? And so that’s my philosophy at the time. And then it wasn’t until meeting with the neurologist at the hospital that put it in perspective. And they said, he said, listen, this was not a small stroke. You are going to have deficits. And he said that on a scale of one to 10, this was about a 5.5.

Bill Gasiamis (22:07)
Thanks

David Willick (22:09)
So

he said, you’re awfully lucky that this fine motor skill is your only physical deficit, but I guarantee you there’s gonna be deficits from this. And he was right. He was right. But I was incredibly determined, determined to, ⁓ had almost like a perfect life beforehand, right? Everything was going well.

you know, perfectly and all this and I was determined to get back to my near perfect life as fast as I possibly could. So the occupational therapist, they showed me where the self help table was. ⁓ And when I wasn’t in my room, I was ⁓ I was at the self help table going through all these things. So I would have the formal ⁓ occupational therapy for

with a therapist for an hour a day, but I would work at the self-help table for two to three hours before my session and two to three hours after the session. Like what else do you do? You’re in the hospital, you’re locked down, right? So I was always at that table and working through that, which really helped.

Post-Stroke Fatigue and Recovery Challenges

Bill Gasiamis (23:28)
That’s exactly my point, the theory as well. was in rehab. My left side was numb. I had to learn how to walk again, use my left side ⁓ motor skills were off. ⁓ The muscles in my leg were weaker or didn’t weren’t activating so they, my knee kept dropping. I couldn’t stand up and, but I was experiencing fatigue, a lot of fatigue and

I’d go to rehab, we’d do the hour in the rehab hospital for whatever day that was. Sometimes it was in the pool, sometimes it was in the gym, sometimes it was playing video games. And then I would come back and have a bit of a nap or a rest and kind of recuperate. But then there might be some time, quite a lot of time between the next session. So I would imagine, I would meditate and imagine myself walking again.

I would imagine my hand working again. And I imagined it doing those tasks perfectly, as if it was doing them before the deficit. But it wasn’t, in reality, it wasn’t doing it perfectly, but in my mind, I was running the program for perfection of the walk and using the arm, so that the neurons that are firing off in my head

⁓ then hopefully have something to remember and recognize when I’m going through the physical part of the recovery. And then I was watching YouTube videos of people ⁓ and neuroplasticity and about stroke recovery and about all this kind of stuff. And I was just trying to find as many different ⁓ resources to just complete the

recovery picture, even though it was only an hour or two a day, physically, it was maybe six or seven hours in total because the rest of it included all these other little bits and pieces. And I think it helped tremendously because instead of just sitting there being bored, it made me feel like I was contributing to the recovery more and more. And that was what I think got me through the one.

probably the five weeks that I spent in rehab.

David Willick (25:59)
And that’s awesome. And that’s along the lines of what I was doing as well, just really pushing the envelope to, to visualize yourself, you know, back. ⁓ There was a, I’m an engineer. so there was this, you know, rector set toy type of thing at the occupational therapy. And I was, I was just so focused on

you know, these small nuts and bolts and being able to do this again, because I like tinkering with machines and, know, on the side and, and it was so important to me to have that back to, to not lose that and what I used to do. And my, manager sent me this book and it was called my stroke of insight. And it’s a very, yeah, exactly. And, and I, I found that.

Bill Gasiamis (26:52)
You’re popular.

Post-Stroke Fatigue – Sensory Overload and Sensitivity

David Willick (26:59)
fascinating and it was very helpful for me to read through that and and you know it taught me a lot and it also taught me just you know when your body says rest ⁓ rest and and I had tremendous amount of fatigue and so when people would look at me they would say well you you look normal you know you don’t have that deficit but they didn’t realize how hard it was and how much I was struggling and and actually

And during the first, I would say two months after getting out of the hospital, had two periods of 48 hours where I slept for about 44 of the 48 hours. I would wake up and maybe have a little bit of food. And then I would look at my wife and I’d say, you know what?

Bill Gasiamis (27:47)
tomorrow.

David Willick (27:58)
I feel really tired again. And then I was asleep for like another 10 hours and get up for 10 minutes. then, and then, you know, we’ve, my wife phoned the hospital and she said, is this normal? And said, just let them get as much rest as, as, as he needs. it has, it was almost like my brain became like an infant again. And when you’re learning so much and you’re trying to rebuild so much,

you require a lot more sleep. And so the fatigue, yeah.

Bill Gasiamis (28:29)
It is,

I was going to say it’s a great analogy. Your brain is becoming an infant again and it needs to heal and recover. And sleep is one of the most critical things that you need for recovery. Without sleep, then those neuronal structures cannot, ⁓ they can’t become stable and they can’t stay attached and ⁓ they just disappear. So you need…

as one of the key ingredients to the physical recovery, you need to sleep. That’s the next stage of the physical recovery so that those neuronal patterns can stick.

David Willick (29:13)
Yeah, absolutely. And, and so I’ve respected that and I, and I never, I never tried to force myself to, ⁓ to stay awake when my body was telling me I needed to sleep. another thing that was really, you know, weird or, or interesting in my case, every stroke is different. But when my, when my sensation came back on my left side,

it came back in a hyper way. And so if I say before the stroke, was a hundred percent. And then, you know, at the first 36 hours or so it was zero. When it did come back, it came back like 125%. And so it took me six months to have a warm shower again, because even warm water felt scalding to my skin.

absolutely scalding. And so it was it was almost like a heightened sensitivity on the on surface of my skin. It was really

Bill Gasiamis (30:20)
What about cold?

I have the same issue on my left side, over sensitive. ⁓ The wind on catching the hair on my arm hurts. The hot water, I don’t know whether it’s warm enough or cold enough. I can never tell because half of my body’s feeling good. The other half’s not feeling the best. Sometimes I perspire on just half of my face or body.

Do you have similar kinds of things as well?

David Willick (30:53)
No, for some reason it wasn’t the cold so much and it was the heat. And so I would take ice showers only because anything warm was scalding on my left side. And so I got used to just taking ⁓ cold showers, but I never had that, ⁓ the extreme, like my right side just seemed to adapt.

you know, be okay with the cold. wasn’t like I was, I was shivering. It was more sensation. The heat was, it was a big deal.

Bill Gasiamis (31:30)
What was the hardest challenge to overcome physically or emotionally?

Emotional and Physical Challenges

David Willick (31:35)
⁓ It was the exhaustion ⁓ associated with complicated tasks. It took me a year to learn how to drive an automobile again.

And not to say that I couldn’t do it, I could do it. But driving for five minutes or 10 minutes would cause me to need to sleep for hours. All right? And the best way to describe it is when I was learning how to drive again, and

all I’ve driving for decades and all the normal ⁓ driving ⁓ that had become ⁓ automatic to me is almost like my automatic part of my brain was no longer there. That’s where the stroke was. And so everything became very manual.

And let me describe it with a bit of an analogy. So when I first started driving again, I lived in a small remote area with only one stoplight in the whole town. And so as I’m approaching the stoplight and the light is red, there’s a truck in front of me. And they say, OK, my brain’s telling me, OK, I must apply the brakes. But there’s a car behind me. But I can’t apply the brakes too quickly.

Otherwise I’m going to get rear ended. If I apply the brakes not hard enough, then I’m going to hit the end of that truck. So at what point in time and, that mechanical thought process was there on every observation. And so to this day, you know, three and a bit years later, driving in acclimate, ⁓ weather conditions still

makes me more exhausted than anything else, right? So if it’s raining, if it’s dark, if it’s snowing and I’m driving and the noise associated with the car, I had a real issue with noise. And ⁓ for the first six months, I had to wear noise canceling headphones and sunglasses even inside the house because any noise was just… ⁓

It was just mind boggling. And I remember going to a restaurant the first time after a stroke and I was starving. I was really hungry and I went out with my wife and our two closest friends. it was like my brain was trying to understand everything that was happening in the room. Every single conversation at every single table, I was trying to understand and I was trying to just

And I couldn’t shut out background noise. And I was just trying to understand it. And so after about 35, 40 minutes, I didn’t even touch my meal. I said, I can’t do it. I’m too tired. I need to leave. so I had to leave. That’s what it was, exactly.

From Post-Stroke Fatigue To The Journey of Recovery

Bill Gasiamis (35:05)
It’s very common and I still get sensory overload. Right now in front of me, there’s a bright light. You can see it reflecting on my hand. And it’s necessary because of, you know, what you hear about recording videos and all that. There’s certain things you have to do to make sure that the lighting is amazing and you look fantastic. And on this side, there’s another bright light. Exactly. There you go. There’s that bright light there. And the challenge with these lights is that they are the widest of the white.

lights and in that spectrum, even on a cloudy day where the sun is not appearing, but it kind of is causing that real bright sort of experience, I get headaches. So I have to record a podcast interview every time with two lights that are going to cause me mild discomfort while I’m discussing it and then a little bit of time to recover afterwards. I’ve got some

noise-cancelling headphones, I take them on the airplane, I take ⁓ them if I go to a concert or somewhere loud, and I just put them in just so that I can just get a little bit of chill time and I can enjoy the space because I used to avoid going to those events because it was too hard. So that helps. it’s one of the things that has sort of lasted the longest for me is that light.

sound sensitivity, but it is lesser than before. So it doesn’t happen as often, except if it’s a cloudy day. If it’s a cloudy day, it’s happening all day. And there have been moments where in the house as well, I’ll have my sunglasses on during the day. And at night, there’s no lights above my head. It’s all dark above my head and we just have night lights in the corner. So very common experience.

one of the ones that is the most manageable for me. It’s one of the ones that I can manage quite as a pair of sunglasses, thankfully for the noise canceling earphones and then ⁓ changing the lighting.

David Willick (37:20)
Right. Yeah, no, it’s, it’s, it’s hard to describe to anybody that hasn’t been through the experience. To this day, I still have difficulty listening, listening to some music, especially if it’s, it’s like music in the car. I can’t do it yet. And ⁓ it’s just because there’s too much going on. I remember my first Christmas, post stroke my first Christmas.

And my daughter had background music, Christmas music on in the background. And the chatter in the foreground and the music in the background was too much. So I had to ask her to shut that off. But I’m better now. I’m better, but it still adds an element of exhaustion.

Bill Gasiamis (38:10)
If I’m in the car early in the morning and the music is off, it’s way, way better and there’s no radio. It’s way, better than if it was on. And I’ve just become more recently aware that, the radio is not on and there’s no additional noise. And that’s a better experience while I’m driving and focusing on the road. So that happens quite often now. As the day progresses and

I think, you know, my brain comes online or I wake up more or I’m not sure what the word is. It gets a little better. But then if I’ve had a big day and then I’m tired at the end of the day, then it’s better to have it off. ⁓ That’s fascinating. Did you have a moment when things clicked for you and you kind of felt, my gosh, I’ve improved here. I’ve got better here. I found myself in a situation where I wasn’t the most aware of my…

improvements somebody else had to tell me and at one point in the communication recovery ⁓ speaking and that the my psychologist was the one who brought it to my attention did you have ⁓ a aha moment like that

David Willick (39:25)
I did actually. ⁓ what I did, again, being a scientific person, I kept a journal. And I kept a journal of what I was doing today and what worked, what didn’t work. ⁓ And then because I was dealing with a little bit of depression at the time as well. ⁓

And I found what was helpful for me was just to record and keep a daily journal on what I actually did do. And so then I would look over the list at the end of the week and I’d think, you know what? This stuff is, you know, I’ve definitely improved. And, you know, at the very beginning, just little things.

Like if something went wrong, it would send me down a downward spiral, sometimes for an hour, sometimes for two days. And, and I just, it was hard to get out of that. Say for example, I, I lost a key and I know I’m going to find this key and I know it’s somewhere in the house, but, I lost it. And so a downward spiral and, and that, I guess the aha moment.

was when I started reviewing things and realized like, you know, these little things that used to trip me up all the time, you know, they’re not tripping me up anymore and I’m able to do it. And I was able to be less bothered by this, which was helpful.

The Impact of Memory Loss

Bill Gasiamis (41:13)
Yeah, had moments where…

I went to the, when I first started driving again, I went to the local shopping mall, what we call the shopping center. And I parked the car and then went and picked up the things I needed to pick up for the dinner, the dinner that night. And then I went to find the car and I couldn’t find the car. I had no idea where the car was. And I was walking around the car park.

for ages and ages. And it rang my brother at one point. I said, I think he rang me. What are you doing? What are you up to? I said, I’ve just gone to the shops and I went and bought some things and I’m looking for my car. I have no idea where the car is. Just cannot find it. I was more, it was more a what the heck is going on moment. Like it was more me going, this is so strange. This is so bizarre.

I have no recollection of where I parked the car, which level it might be on, which wing of the shopping center it be on, I had idea and just kept walking around. And then eventually, I don’t know whether I fluked it or I just stumbled on it what happened, but I had the, oh, okay, there it is. And I got in the car and I could, it wasn’t an hour. I don’t think I was looking for an hour, but it was way longer than say 30 minutes. And it was just so.

interesting for it to be gone. And when my memory came back,

I couldn’t remember, for example, who came to visit me at some point. And even ⁓ about a year ago, I bumped into a friend of mine who said, I came to visit you when we had lunch, et cetera. And I saw that is not in my memory at all. Like, I believe you, but I just cannot recall it. And then that started to get better and I started to remember ⁓ things and I kind of felt much better about it.

and also speaking. So I would start a sentence and then forget in the middle of the sentence what I was talking about. And my wife would go, where’s the rest of the sentence? And I’m like, I don’t know, it’s gone. I’ve got nothing to say.

David Willick (43:35)
interesting. You know, I had I didn’t have those exact issues, but I had an issue with repeating myself. And I would, I would forget completely forget that I had just explained something to somebody. And then, you know, 30 minutes would go by and then I would, I would explain it all over again, or I would ask the question all over again is that what we just covered this, you know,

30 minutes ago as it changed and I said, we did, you know, I didn’t have any recollection of the prior conversation. So, you know, the repeating myself got better, you know, over time, but I didn’t recognize it.

Bill Gasiamis (44:21)
Mm-hmm. Yeah, that’s the thing. That’s the part of it. You don’t know what you don’t know because Yeah, so it’s not there anymore the same way that it was before a little bit earlier. You mentioned depression 33 % of people who have a stroke roughly will experience depression of some kind Was your depression kind of based around your

the changes that had occurred to you and how you were dealing with them. Was it a ⁓ mental health type issue that you, something that you couldn’t grapple with? Do you know what was at the bottom of that?

David Willick (45:02)
think it was just a kind of a temporary, a temporary.

event that or that I went through for a few months where, little tiny things like just any little, I would have little sparks or little, little events that would happen. mentioned the key that I lost and there was a couple of other things and I, and I think I would just get so down on myself for being injured. And that was essentially

the source of the depression. And so I was never clinically diagnosed as depressed. I never had to take medication for depression, ⁓ but it was just something I had to be aware of. And I’m so lucky to have a loving family and a loving wife that ⁓ was with me every step of the way and ⁓ really guiding me and helping me through this.

you know, highlighting the things that I could do now that I couldn’t do yesterday type of thing. And another thing that was really difficult for me was, you know, again, as a scientific person, I, if you break your arm or your break a ball, then you know that, you know, week, week one, you’re going to do this and week two, you’re going to do this and week three, you know, by end of week six, maybe week seven, you’re going to be all set, right? What

what I couldn’t understand and I had no, I couldn’t even fathom was the nonlinear recovery of this. You you’d have two or three days in a row where, my God, I’m better today than I was yesterday and I’m better, you know, I’m going to be better tomorrow. And then by next week, I’m going to be really, you know, pretty good. And that linear recovery was completely wrong. My recovery was completely nonlinear.

It was like looking at a 30 year chart of a stock market. Yeah, eventually, yes, you you’re going in the right direction. But boy, boy, there’s some rough days down. That’s for sure.

Bill Gasiamis (47:22)
Yeah, that is a great analogy. those, ⁓ that little, those moments of sort of feeling depressed and down, did you ever feel like giving up? Did they get to that? How ⁓ deep were

David Willick (47:36)
never

really got to that level. No, I never really got to that level, but there was a few times where it would get close and then I would just kind of talk to myself and just say, okay, just take a deep breath and one day at a time type of thing, one day at a time. But ⁓ it was a few dark days. But like I said, with a good support network around, was good. ⁓

Bill Gasiamis (48:02)
But,

⁓ so how have you changed as a person since the stroke?

Shifting Perspectives on Life

David Willick (48:10)
Well, I guess I’m, I’m a lot more appreciative of health. You know, there’s always that, you know, you, your focus is on, you know, career or your focus is on ⁓ building wealth and all of this stuff. And you know, building, you know, going higher and going faster, you know, doing this. Now I’m

I’m not so worried about those things. And ⁓ I’m very fortunate to ⁓ work for an awesome company. And ⁓ so I took six months of short-term disability, and then I did an additional one year of long-term disability.

And then I went back to work in a part-time basis and I had a gradual return to work plan. And so it started off at like six hours a week and worked my way back to full time over the course of I’d say eight weeks. And when I hit 20 hours per week, I didn’t think I was going to make it. I really didn’t.

because I needed morning and afternoon naps at that point. so, you know, and anyway, and I eventually pushed through it and I used the analogy of a ceiling. so when I was at that, you know, 20 hour week, I was banging up against the ceiling.

and then I was resting, listening to my body and resting. And then I would bang and it would hit the ceiling again and then resting and then bang, hit the ceiling again and then resting. And then over the course of multiple weeks, my wife and I looked at each other and said, my God, your ceiling is so much higher now than it used to be. So.

even though it was painful, even though it was slow, I think for me and in my case, like I said, every stroke is unique. In my case, going back to work was one of the best things that I could have done. And it really pushed my recovery from I would say 65 % all the way up to like 95%.

And then I guess this is long way to answer your question in that, do I aspire to be, you know, the CEO of the company? Absolutely not. Absolutely not. So, you know, I’m kind of in the last role of my career phase right now, and I have no aspirations for further career growth. My whole point now is knowledge transfer.

And how can I take 35 years of industry experience, 35 plus years of working with people? And how can I mentor younger people and transfer as much knowledge as I can for the relatively short time that I’m going to be still working?

The Importance of Mentorship

Bill Gasiamis (51:50)
I love it. That is sensational. And then long-term, you can write a book.

David Willick (51:57)
Perhaps, or maybe start a podcast.

Bill Gasiamis (52:00)
Wow. Even better because I am not an engineer and I could come on the engineering podcast and talk about stroke just because I know you and that would be fantastic.

David Willick (52:14)
It sounds like a great collaboration for sure.

Bill Gasiamis (52:17)
It would be. And that’s the beauty about podcasts is actually, ⁓ it’s a forever. It’s evergreen, right? So you record the episode, you put it on YouTube job done. You don’t have to worry about it anymore. And you don’t have to worry whether anyone watches it or not. You don’t have to worry what people think about it or not. And if you want to, you can interact with people and all that type of stuff. ⁓ it is one of the best ways to get a deep.

conversation occurring about a topic that you’re interested in and the other person is interested in. And now we have the means. We don’t need a studio. You can just do it from your bedroom. This is a little studio. It’s in my garden and it’s like a garden shed and it’s painted black and it has some sound proofing type of acoustical kind of treatment. And that’s about it. And a $400 microphone and a computer and you’re done.

And now if you edit it, well then you can learn about editing. Now you’re gonna have time on your hands and that’s gonna be perfect. So there’s this, ⁓ and even for me, I was a painting contract, I still am, still have a painting company. And the boys are working at the moment and things are getting managed and I’m recording an episode. But what this sort of shift in technology has enabled me to do.

is find new opportunities, new skills, ⁓ develop new skills and meet people from all around the world, create a community that was never there before, record 370 episodes. And then as a result of that, a book, speak publicly about the topic that I’ve become interested in. And it’s all doable simply because you no longer need to get into the news ⁓ studio. You no longer need to have ⁓

a radio ⁓ contract. You can just be you and you can get it out there and it’s very, very rewarding. It is just amazing how rewarding it can be. So I would encourage you to contemplate all of those opportunities. And now what’s great about ⁓ this is that

If you need help to do it, you can reach out to so many different people to find help as to what you’re lacking or what you’re missing or what need to do. And YouTube is just full of helpful videos about lighting, about recording equipment, about sound, about settings, everything you need to know. there’s…

David Willick (54:56)
YouTube is amazing. I use it in so many things. If I have to rip something apart that I haven’t done before, first thing I do is watch a couple of YouTube videos. It’s amazing.

Bill Gasiamis (55:06)
Yeah.

It was the beginning of my recovery YouTube and it’s and it’s continuing to be because now if I’m interested in philosophy, if I’m interested in any topic that kind of comes across my desk, then I can just dive, dive deeply into it. And from the comfort of my own home, I don’t have to be near somebody to

benefit from hearing them speak about a particular topic. It’s great. And I don’t do well reading, although I like reading. It’s a bit of a struggle. ⁓ So listening makes it way, better.

David Willick (55:47)
Right. Absolutely. So do you listen to eBooks as opposed to reading them? See, I’m still okay with, you know, reading and writing is not an issue. And for me, it’s ⁓ like yesterday, had an incredibly busy day. And, you know, I commuted an hour into the largest city and had multiple meetings with multiple different people.

There was a evening ⁓ social hour and all that stuff and ⁓ a late night and then you come home and it’s like, okay, I’m feeling it today. it’s a pushed it a little bit, but once again, it’s, you know, relatively speaking, it’s very minor and ⁓ it’s just ⁓ something to be aware of. It’s the new me, right?

It’s, you know, again, I’m thankful that, ⁓ you know, that’s, I’m able to do so much and I’m just ⁓ self-aware that when I do push it one day, I make sure that my next day is relatively light.

Bill Gasiamis (57:04)
I love that self aware. I’m the same in that if I have a big Saturday, then Sunday is there’s nothing booked. So still after all the time that I’ve been going through this, you know, since 2012, I cannot have two big days in a row because then the rest of the week becomes really terrible. and then work piles up, then I can’t get stuff done. Then I can’t catch up. And then it’s just a terrible cycle. So

⁓ It’s really important. So if somebody was ⁓ Just coming across this episode, they’ve just had a stroke, what would you like to say to them?

Encouragement for New Survivors

David Willick (57:50)
I would like to say that it’s going to be okay. You know, it’s, you can get better and will you ever be a hundred percent again? Maybe, maybe not, but don’t get discouraged. ⁓ Work at it every day and keep pushing and you’ll see over time.

that you get better and better. You have to know when to push and you have to know when to ⁓ relax and to allow your body to recover and sleep. And that was the hardest thing for me. And it was like, when do I push and when do I relax? And there’s no magic formula.

You have to do it the way you feel. And so for me, I like pushing and then seeing me hit the ceiling and then recover. And then the next day, the ceiling is higher. So for those people that had just had this, there’s hope. There’s ⁓ a future.

you know what, sometimes my outlook is better now than it was pre-stroke, you know, I, you know, I was focused on, you know, climbing higher in that social and in that corporate ladder. And, and now that’s not important to me anymore. And I’m perfectly comfortable, you know, trying to, guess, just mentor other people to, to, you know, take that knowledge. And so you can pivot.

and still get fulfillment and very good satisfaction out of life, ⁓ even though it’s slightly different than it used to be. Another thing for me is I use exercise and I used exercise through my recovery. And, you know, it’s easy to sit on a chair and just sit there for hour and hour. But if I do that for a couple of days in a row, what ends up happening is I start losing ⁓

a little bit of mobility in my left side. And ⁓ so too many days of ⁓ not walking or being, you know, know, stuck in a chair. And so I would say get up and move because then I start walking like I’m intoxicated and staggering a little bit. so I try to get out there and I try to walk, ⁓ you know, at

you know, a good portion every day and get a little exercise. When the weather is not cooperative with that, I have an elliptical in the basement where I could jump on the elliptical for a little while or a treadmill and, you know, just have a walk indoors. And I think that’s really important as well.

Bill Gasiamis (1:01:03)
Do you ever have the, do you ever walk next to somebody, your wife or somebody you know, and find yourself sort of running into them? I do it all the time with my wife when we’re walking, especially if she’s walking on my left.

David Willick (1:01:17)
Yes, I do that. And my wife is very aware of everything. And I also have a voice. And when I first had the stroke, and the best way to describe this is if you had a loose tooth and you’re afraid to swallow it, and you start talking like, you know,

And as soon as I start talking as if I’m trying not to swallow a loose tooth, my wife, 100%, she knows, okay, you’ve pushed it too far. That’s my first sign of being tired, right? And then if I push past that or if I’m not talking, if I start staggering while I’m walking, ⁓ she’ll know, okay, I know you’re pushing it, you’re tired. ⁓

And so see the signs, know your own signs and just respect those signs. And I guess, you know, going back as well, what really helped me was journaling. And if you’ve just had a stroke and you think it’s so, you you’re in despair and whatnot, you know, if you journal and keep a really good track of what you’re doing and you will see that over time.

⁓ You’re doing more and more and you’re having less and less issues. so, and when you’re having a bad day and you’re feeling, you know, you know, it’s, the despair is just too much. Just take a look at your journal and take a look at how far you’ve come and it’ll pick you up.

Bill Gasiamis (1:03:04)
Yeah, that’s a great, ⁓ that’s great advice. So what is there? What do you believe about healing or growth that you perhaps didn’t believe before?

David Willick (1:03:18)
I think that it’s multi-dimensional. so healing and growth, the definition of it today for me is quite a bit different than the definition that would have been three, four years ago before stroke. So I’m more appreciative of the little things. ⁓ And I think I would classify some positive growth

⁓ not just ⁓ in dollars and cents, but positive growth ⁓ is all about mindset now and it’s less about monetary things. And so I like to say that, you know, if you’re thrown a situation and the situation doesn’t change, that’s the situation, the mindset that you take at that situation could lead you way off there.

or way off the other direction. And even though the situation is exactly the same, the mindset that you have looking at that situation could make you really angry, really sad, really depressed, or it could make you maybe appreciative. It could make you pivot. It could make you, you know, perhaps happy, but…

nothing has changed in the situation is on your mindset. And I didn’t really fully understand that prior to stroke, but I guess I’ve had time to reflect and I’ve had time to, to really do some self awareness learning. And, and now I applied that mindset shift more now than I ever have before.

Bill Gasiamis (1:05:11)
One of the cool things that I was taught to ask was, is this serving me right now?

And if you’ve got one of those bad mindset moments that you aren’t aware of and you’re in the spiral, the negative one, the terrible one, and you have the self awareness just to say, is this serving me right now? That’s usually something that can support shifting the mindset in another direction. I’ve definitely done that and found myself being able to decrease the amount of time that I’m in that loop of negativity perhaps, and then change it so that.

⁓ that is less impactful and is it serving me kind of makes me.

David Willick (1:05:57)
wish.

Bill Gasiamis (1:05:58)
It’s a meta position. You have to kind of observe yourself in that situation as you’re looping in the negative way. And then from there, you can see that doesn’t look good. Like I’ve got to stop that. I’ve got to change and shift and get into a mindset that at least is neutral, if not serving me.

David Willick (1:06:21)
Exactly. And it’s just making you more injured or in my case, when I spiral, you know, it’s only harming me, you know, and so I chose to avoid that before it gets too, ⁓ too severe, right? And it’s not easy. It, it takes a lot of practice and it takes a lot of, ⁓ you know, internal coaching, but

you know, once you once you’re able to recognize that first step towards that negative side, and then you take a step back, it’s easier than trying to pull yourself back when you’ve been in it for minutes or hours, you know,

Bill Gasiamis (1:07:08)
Yeah. ⁓ what’s one lesson that stroke has taught you that most people might not understand.

David Willick (1:07:19)
Patience, perseverance, think is, know, buzzwords perhaps before, but nowadays, know, that perseverance, ⁓ you know, we can overcome, the human brain is just, is so amazing and it’s so resilient and just,

to keep going and to have that perseverance to go. And I think that’s one thing I did learn from this experience. And so I remember my nurses and the occupational therapists that I had in the hospital and they said they’d never met a more motivated patient than me. And it’s something about that motivation, that determination, that perseverance

that don’t accept. And I remember going to my family doctor after this and the family doctor, she said something that really infuriated me. She goes, just accept the fact that this is the way you are. This is your new reality. And I didn’t, I was nowhere near in my recovery. And if I had listened to that advice, you know, I would still be stuck at that 60, 65 % threshold.

and nowhere near the 95, 98 % threshold that I’m at now. So perseverance is one thing and determination. those are things that I always had, but I learned. I learned a lot more about myself and about those things that make it really important.

Bill Gasiamis (1:09:09)
Yeah, that new normal thing is really frustrating. I’ve heard it a few times as well. ⁓ And I also heard it during lockdown here in Melbourne, in Australia, during COVID, we had nearly two years of lockdown. saying new normal was such a triggering thing because it came from a, no, you shouldn’t expect anymore. And that’s kind of what I, when somebody said that to me in the past, you know, through stroke recovery,

in the future, anytime I’ve heard that, it’s always been, you shouldn’t expect anymore. And it’s like, rest on your laurels, do less, don’t make any effort. And so what are you talking about, new normal? As if we’re gonna just sit now, we’re gonna, this is gonna be the peak of our existence, we’re just gonna accept everything and then not try for better. And that was really frustrating. And why I don’t do things normally.

You know how there’s some people who do things to prove other people wrong? I’m not that guy. So those types of comments really upset me to hear them from other people because I’m on the journey to achieving, overcoming, recovering, all those things. And what I don’t need is somebody messing with my journey. I don’t want you messing with it. If you’re enhancing it, you’re welcome. You’re on board. Let’s do this together. If you’re not,

Keep quiet and stay in the corner. Don’t come near me.

David Willick (1:10:38)
Yeah, exactly. You know what exactly right life’s too short. And, you know, you can pick and choose who you want to be around you want to be dragged down by by people and or do you want to be lifted up and you know, so we we like to socialize with positive people. And, you know, we like to avoid those people that are always dragging you down, right. So it’s just

And you just, I guess it’s opened my eyes to, we have choices. You know, we have many choices in our life. We have choices about our careers. We have choices about our friends. We have choices about the social things that we can do. And it’s okay to say no, it really is. And, you know, I like to push myself a little bit outside my comfort zone. And, and I think that’s okay. ⁓ As long as it doesn’t go too far.

but sometimes if something’s not a fit or if you know it’s not gonna end well, then it’s okay to say no.

Conclusion and Reflections

Bill Gasiamis (1:11:46)
Yeah, I agree. And on that note, David, I really appreciate you reaching out and joining me on the podcast. enjoyed our conversation. Thank you so much.

David Willick (1:11:55)
Thank you for having me, Bill. It’s been my pleasure. Thank you.

Bill Gasiamis (1:11:59)
Well, thanks for tuning into my conversation with David Willick. I hope his honesty about invisible fatigue, sensory overload and redefining success gives you something to hold onto in your own recovery. Remember to subscribe on YouTube, leave a review on your favorite podcast platform and share this episode with someone who needs it. These simple actions help push this content out to survivors who are feeling lost, confused or misunderstood. And you never know.

who might hear exactly what they needed today. If you want to go deeper, remember to check out my book, The Unexpected Way That a Stroke Became the Best Thing That Happened. It’s my lived experience guide to post-traumatic growth after stroke. And if you are able to support the show and help me reach 1,000 episodes, visit Patreon at patreon.com/recoveryafterstroke Remember to take the next step in your recovery, no matter how small it feels today. As always, see you in the next episode.

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