🧠 Fibromuscular Dysplasia (FMD) and Stroke: What You Need to Know
Fibromuscular dysplasia (FMD) is a rare condition that can silently impact arteries and, in some cases, lead to life-changing events like stroke. While not commonly discussed in stroke recovery circles, it’s a diagnosis that stroke survivors and their caregivers should be aware of, especially when the stroke occurs in a younger individual or without traditional risk factors.
🩺 What Is Fibromuscular Dysplasia?
Fibromuscular dysplasia is a condition that causes abnormal cell growth in the walls of medium-sized arteries, most commonly affecting the carotid artery (in the neck) and renal artery (leading to the kidneys). This abnormal growth can lead to areas of narrowing (stenosis), aneurysm, or artery dissection—all of which may disrupt blood flow and increase stroke risk.
When FMD impacts the carotid artery, it can cause weakness or tearing in the arterial wall, leading to ischemic strokes or transient ischemic attacks (TIAs).
🧬 Stroke and Fibromuscular Dysplasia: Understanding the Link
Although strokes are more often associated with high blood pressure or heart disease, FMD presents a unique stroke risk, especially in younger, otherwise healthy individuals. Many stroke survivors who are ultimately diagnosed with FMD were unaware they even had the condition.
Common symptoms and warning signs can include:
- Frequent, unexplained headaches
- Dizziness or visual disturbances
- Pulsatile tinnitus (whooshing sounds in the ear)
- Sudden numbness or weakness (often a sign of a TIA or stroke)
- Right-side paralysis if the left carotid artery is involved
🔍 How Is Fibromuscular Dysplasia Diagnosed?
FMD is often discovered after a stroke or TIA, through imaging like:
- CT angiography
- MR angiography
- Duplex ultrasound
These tests can detect arterial abnormalities, helping clinicians make a definitive fibromuscular dysplasia diagnosis.
In some cases, FMD may be coded in medical records using ICD-10 codes such as I77.3 (fibromuscular dysplasia).
📊 FMD and Stroke Recovery: What to Expect
After a stroke caused by FMD, recovery may involve:
- Neurological rehabilitation
- Speech therapy for aphasia
- Occupational therapy to address cognitive and sensory deficits
- Ongoing vascular monitoring with FMD imaging
Because FMD is chronic, regular imaging of the carotid and renal arteries is essential to monitor for new arterial changes or dissections.
🥦 Is There a Fibromuscular Dysplasia Diet?
While there’s no official fibromuscular dysplasia diet, stroke survivors are typically encouraged to follow a heart-healthy, anti-inflammatory diet. This may include:
- Whole grains
- Leafy greens
- Healthy fats (like olive oil and avocado)
- Limited processed sugar and salt
These dietary choices support vascular health and reduce stroke recurrence risk.
📈 What Is the Life Expectancy With FMD?
Many people with FMD live long, full lives. However, outcomes depend on early detection and whether complications like stroke, arterial dissection, or aneurysm rupture occur. With proper monitoring, lifestyle adjustments, and care from a neurologist or vascular specialist, stroke survivors with FMD can continue progressing in their recovery.
🧩 Final Thoughts: FMD, Stroke, and What Survivors Should Know
A stroke caused by fibromuscular dysplasia can feel like it comes out of nowhere. That’s why education, awareness, and self-advocacy matter. If you’ve had a stroke and don’t know why, or if your medical team suspects arterial dissection, ask about FMD and request thorough vascular imaging.
Whether you’re adjusting to new deficits, navigating medical scans, or simply trying to understand what happened to your body, know that you’re not alone. FMD may be rare, but with knowledge and support, you can regain your strength, protect your health, and continue moving forward.
Fibromuscular Dysplasia (FMD) and Stroke: Tara’s Journey of Recovery and Renewal
Fibromuscular dysplasia (FMD) led to Tara’s stroke. Her story of loss, recovery, and rediscovery offers hope to stroke survivors everywhere.
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Highlights
00:00 Tara Miller’s Introduction and Initial Stroke Experience
05:46 In a Blink of an Eye: Tara’s Sudden Stroke After Mysterious Illness
19:39 Fibromuscular Dysplasia (FMD)
30:33 Stroke Follow-Up: Monitoring, Not Intervention
41:06 The Clock Test: A Stroke Survivor’s Recurring Challenge
44:12 Invisible Deficits and the Power of Peer Support
51:09 Healing in the Saddle: Tara’s Journey with Sierra
1:02:45 Quieting the Mind: Tara on Naps and Brain Fatigue
1:08:39 Parenting Through Stroke: Missed Moments and Long-Term Understanding
1:12:15 Small Wins, Big Heart: Tara’s Stroke Recovery Journey
Transcript:
Tara Miller’s Introduction and Initial Stroke Experience
Bill Gasiamis 0:00
Before we begin today, I want to say thank you to everyone who’s left a comment, written a review, supported the show on Patreon, clicked the YouTube super thanks button, bought a copy of my book, or even just chose not to skip the ads. You’re the reason the podcast reaches someone in the middle of their darkest moment. You’re helping them feel seen. You’re helping me keep this going. Today’s conversation is one of those revelations, the kind that stays with you.
Bill Gasiamis 0:29
Tara Miller was 46 when she had a stroke, seemingly out of nowhere, she wasn’t sick, she wasn’t at risk, and yet, a tear in her artery caused by a rare condition called fibromuscular dysplasia, changed everything from a busy career and parenting two daughters to losing her ability to drive, to cope with numbers or to handle the spreadsheet, Tara’s life didn’t just pause it reset.
Bill Gasiamis 0:58
What followed was a slow and deeply personal process of rediscovery through invisible deficits, tias and even a collapsed lung, Tara found new strength in volunteering, horseback riding and learning to show herself the patience she never had before. If you’re in the middle of rebuilding yourself after stroke, this episode is for you. Let’s dive in. Tara Miller, welcome to the podcast.
Tara Miller 1:27
Thank you, Bill. Thanks for having me.
Bill Gasiamis 1:30
Thank you for joining me. I look forward to our conversation. Tell me a little bit about what it was like for you before stroke.
Tara Miller 1:42
Before stroke seems so long ago to me, only three and a half years ago, but a lifetime ago, to be honest with you, before stroke, busy, Busy, busy, I had a career, and he mean, we human resources of payroll. I, I am a mom of two daughters and a wife, but we were busy with life at the time of my stroke in 2021 it was COVID, so I was working at home, but generally I wasn’t at a person that would work at home.
Tara Miller 2:35
So that was kind of, I mean, the world that was an odd time for I believe all of us, but at the time on my stroke, I was working at home, and I just, I don’t, I don’t really think about pre stroke anymore. I don’t have pre stroke is, is a lifetime ago. To me, it’s a lifetime ago.
Bill Gasiamis 3:03
Do you recall what you were focused on back then? What were your goals? What were you hoping to achieve?
Tara Miller 3:12
That’s changed dramatically. I was looking to move up in my career, to be honest with you, and that has that that’s at a standstill, that’s I’m I’m not even back at work. There’s not even like a return to work in place. My company, we have said our goodbyes. Just given the length of time, I have been off, understandably, but at that time, three and a half years ago, I was looking to move up in my career.
Tara Miller 4:01
My youngest daughter was entering her teen years, so you can imagine that was going to be fun and challenging and very demanding of me as a mother, with driving her around, which also came to a dead stop with losing my license for medical reasons, and just everything just came to a stop.
Bill Gasiamis 4:29
How did you view your health? Did you have a sense of whether you were healthy or not, or were you out of shape? Or was there anything that you look back on now and go, or, you know, then I didn’t take care of that or this.
Tara Miller 4:45
No, I would say I wasn’t unhealthy. I wasn’t the healthiest person, like, I’m not a fit guru or anything like that, but I wasn’t unfit. No. Well, I it came out of the blue. It was shocking. I just, I mean, I remember the day like, like it was yesterday.
Bill Gasiamis 5:13
Tell me.
Tara Miller 5:15
Yeah, just it’s even sitting here in this desk, remembering back, because I was actually working down in this room the day it happened. It didn’t happen in this room. It did happen upstairs in my own bedroom, but I had been ill that week, probably related to the stroke, but I had no idea what was going to happen the night I had my stroke, just no idea.
In a Blink of an Eye: Tara’s Sudden Stroke After Mysterious Illness
Bill Gasiamis 5:46
Did you when you say you were ill? What kind of illness did you have? What? What the issue?
Tara Miller 5:53
Earlier that week, I was I had some headaches. I have had headaches, foot stroke, and I have a lot of headaches post stroke that I’m still dealing with, as I think a lot of stroke survivors do. I’ve tried everything, but that couldn’t be another, another topic. So earlier in that week, I had had a headache, one of my money, and I was just feeling unwell, kind of like sick to my stomach. So I had been vomiting, aggressively, vomiting like bruised myself vomiting just because it was so aggressive it was so I was home, I actually, I mean, I was home, but I was home sick.
Tara Miller 6:54
So I called in to sick, even though I was working from home, so I had missed a couple days of work, and then I went back on the Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, and worked my full shift on Friday, or my worked a full hours on Friday, and still wasn’t feeling good. I still had like this stomach.
Tara Miller 7:19
I didn’t know if I had a virus or just my stomach was unwell, and I never wanted to be sick again the way I was, because it was aggressively aggressive, and I went to bed early. And then my world changed. Our world changed. My family’s world changed in a blink of an eye.
Bill Gasiamis 7:44
You went to bed early to get some rest, to hopefully feel better, and then what happened? What did you notice that wasn’t the same? How? How did it go down?
Tara Miller 8:00
It’s just, it’s, it’s surreal to me. It’s surreal because I’ve taken first aid, and while I was in, like, having a stroke, I did not realize I was having a stroke, but while I was in it, I did not know what like, I was fully aware something was different, but I did not know what was different. I i went to the washroom, and then I came back and I had this sensation of, like, this overwhelming sensation of dizziness and like, like a vision loss. So I crawled into bed, and I have one of those beds that can go up and down. And I was watching, and it’s kind of ironic.
Tara Miller 8:58
I was watching shits Creek, like, I love it. I love that show. And I was, I felt this overwhelming sensation that I wanted to go to bed like, I just felt like I’m so tired, and then I was lying there, and I don’t know what episode it was, I don’t remember now, and I don’t know what had happened, but, like, my right side was went numb, so I just thought, Oh, my arm’s asleep. Like, that’s so weird, because I felt something under me, and I was like, what is that? And then it was my arm. I’m like, That’s so weird, like, what’s what’s going on?
Tara Miller 9:42
So I lifted it and it would fall like, That is so weird. And I kept like that is, like, why is it so asleep? Like, it should wake up now, because I’m holding it, and I’d pick it up, and it would fall again, and it would just fall, like, fall back. And I’m like. This is so weird. I don’t know what is going on, but I had this overwhelming sensation. I just wanted to close my eyes, so I was looking for my converter that would put my bed down. And then I kind of this is, this is so weird, but I kind of slid off my bed because I was paralysis on one side, but I did not know that.
Tara Miller 10:25
Because in my head, I didn’t know I was, I guess, stroking out ultimately. So now I’m on the ground, and half of my like my right side, is fully paralysis. So now I’m on the ground with one of my cats, not the one that you’re watching now, and I’m looking at him, and I’m like, What is going on? This is so bizarre to me, like, this is weird. So I finally my husband yells up to me, and he’s like, hon, are you okay?
Tara Miller 11:02
And I kind of, I thought I yelled down to him, like, no, like, something’s weird, but what I feel comes out is what’s, you know, Snoopy, and the like, blah, blah, blah, yeah, that’s what I feel was coming out. So I literally crawl back on my bed, and I’m sitting there, and my husband happens to come up because he he doesn’t hear a response from me, and I show him, I say to him.
Bill Gasiamis 11:43
Let’s pause here for a moment. At this point in the story, you’ve heard what it was like for Tara to lose her career, her license and the ability to do something as routine as math, all while looking fine from the outside. If you’re listening to this and thinking, That’s me too, I want you to know you’re not alone. Invisible. Deficits are real. The exhaustion is real, and making it through the day can feel like a full time job.
Bill Gasiamis 12:09
If this part of the story resonated with you, drop a comment on YouTube and let me know what’s been the hardest part of your recovery that others don’t see. Also, a huge thanks to everyone helping this show grow your YouTube super thanks your support of the book, and those of you on Patreon, you’re keeping this conversation going. All right, let’s get back to Tara as she begins to talk about rebuilding life with fatigue, horseback riding and a new kind of resilience.
Tara Miller 12:41
Look at my arm, so I lift up my arm, and he looks at me, and his face drops about 10 shades. And I’m like, Oh my God, what’s wrong? And he’s like, I’m going to call 911, and I’m like, why? But I guess I didn’t realize I wasn’t really speaking like so it’s gibberish, and to me, I’m speaking perfectly fine, but to him, I’m not making any sense. So he calls 911, and then paramedics came and they call over to a hospital that has a stroke unit and well, I guess the rest is history.
Tara Miller 13:29
But the fun thing about the paramedics coming is, when they come to get me, I don’t have a droopy face, so I only have two of the three symptoms, yeah, the fast. And we do fast. We don’t do be fast. We’re starting to do be fast here, but it’s just fast. So as we’re as we’re like, in my driveway, I’m like, I have to be home by Sunday, I have payroll to do, and the paramedics are like, Yeah, I don’t think so.
Tara Miller 14:08
But you you talk to the doctor. I’m like, Well, no, like, I gotta be home. Like, I don’t think so. Yeah, yeah, okay, so then we went to the hospital. I don’t know where I was, like, I don’t know if I was like, in my body or not, because I was, I was, I was all coherent, but I wasn’t really an I don’t think I knew the severity of what was going on, because then, when we got to the hospital and they opened up the doors.
Tara Miller 14:50
There was, like, all these doctors and nurses at the at the like the doors, and I’m like, Are they there for me? And the paramedics are. Yes, it’s like an episode of Grey’s Anatomy for me. And I’m like, Oh my goodness. They’re like, this is very serious. I’m like, Well, it’s, it’s, it’s odd to me, because I feel I’m perfectly fine, wow, like in my head, but I don’t, I don’t realize the severity of it.
Bill Gasiamis 15:22
There’s a disconnect between your brain, which is stroking out the seriousness of the situation your body, and that whole test that you were doing where your arm wasn’t working. That’s just it’s very common. People often tell me how they observe their body during the stroke. They’re not alarmed or concerned or anything, and they just find the fascinatingly bizarre that their arm or their leg is not working. It’s not uncommon at all. So you get to the hospital, they treat you like royalty. They bring you in, and then what? What happens then?
Tara Miller 16:10
So I did ask if I could go to the washroom, and the doctor’s like, No, we’re going to do some tests on you. Can you wait? And I remember saying, I guess so, but, and she said, this is very serious. And I’m like, okay, whatever, so I just went with the flow, keep in mind I had on my pajamas, because it was bedtime, and I asked the paramedics if I could change, and they’re like, no. So I looked at my husband, so I left the house with a T shirt on, shorts and my cell phone.
Tara Miller 16:58
So when I get there, I have my T shirt, shorts, my cell phone, and they put a pair of yellow socks on me because I was bit cold, like after they do all these tests. I did a CT scan, I believe I was still stroking, so the doctor at that hospital, did not administer the TPA. She did not it was, I have learned it could have gone either way, but she took the more conservative approach, I would say, and did not do it, because she didn’t see the stroke at the time on the on the CAT scan. So they admitted me to the stroke ward.
Tara Miller 17:56
I was there for a week. We did the MRI, which that was my first MRI ever, and that is absolutely scary. I’m used to them now, because you get used to them after having a brain injury, but I had the MRI. So the stroke was a Friday night. I had the MRI, I believe, on the Monday, and then it came back. Yeah, indeed, it was a stroke. And when the doctor told me, I just started to cry.
Bill Gasiamis 18:37
Was that the realized something was actually seriously wrong.
Tara Miller 18:44
I was like a stroke, like I’m 46 years old. It seems weird, and I just, I can still remember him telling me, because I was just coming back from walking around with my walker, and I mean, not even that far, because I couldn’t walk that far. And him saying, Yeah, you’ve had like a left side stroke.
Bill Gasiamis 19:15
So were you walking within seven days? Were you back on your feet? Did that initial paralysis settled down.
Tara Miller 19:24
It did. I was walking with a walker.
Bill Gasiamis 19:27
Yeah. So it started to settle down quite, quite quickly while they were treating you. So it was an ischemic stroke. Do they know what was the underlying cause?
Fibromuscular Dysplasia (FMD)
Tara Miller 19:39
So the medical term is fibromuscular dysplasia. So artery dissection, which means I have weak arteries, and we would never have found that out unless I had a stroke. So it stemmed from the neck and then went to my brain. Now with, with, it’s common that. So that was a major stroke, probably the week before I did have a mini stroke that was on the right side. And it’s quite common that you have a little stroke before a big stroke, but I might have had just a headache, which I did.
Tara Miller 20:37
I’ve had headaches commonly, so with the type of stroke I had which and I’m thankful that I do know why I had a stroke, because there are lots of people who don’t I did. So I’m in year three, three and a half years now. I did go every six months for scans of my neck and my head and my my stomach, because they want to make sure all the major arteries they’re staying.
Bill Gasiamis 21:14
In good working order.
Tara Miller 21:16
They’re in good working order. So I do have a vascular specialist that I do see regularly on top of the neurologist, yeah, and I’ve had, you know, in my recovery, I was, you know, hopping along, doing okay, cuz recovery is the first year for me, is, I think just I don’t even know what to say about the first year. To be honest with you, I think I was in denial.
Bill Gasiamis 21:51
You couldn’t accept that.
Tara Miller 21:53
No, I joined a lot of peer support groups through March of Dimes. That’s where I’ve met a lot of my stroke survivor friends. That’s how I found out about you, obviously, through my my friends. But I thought I was going back to work in January. I thought I was getting my license back. So many things, and it’s 3.5 years and I’m not back to work because of my cognitive deficit. I just got my license back last week. Congratulations. Thank you. It’s quite a milestone. Mm, but the the brain fatigue is a new level, a new level with driving.
Bill Gasiamis 22:42
So much to concentrate on. And, oh, your brain gets overwhelmed.
Tara Miller 22:47
It does. It does get overwhelmed. But I’m very thankful I have my license back.
Bill Gasiamis 22:52
It’s short trips now.
Tara Miller 22:56
Yeah, I just.
Bill Gasiamis 22:59
And it’ll come back, it’ll improve as you start to build up the muscle again of driving, and it should be less and less fatiguing, but it makes complete sense the sensory overload from driving so many things you gotta pay attention to, all at one time.
Tara Miller 23:18
It is my naps are much longer. My naps are much longer now with driving.
Bill Gasiamis 23:27
When do you find you need to do a nap, like, what time of the day?
Tara Miller 23:30
I nap about anywhere between like one and four. I used to be able to nap for just an hour, but since driving, I would probably do a two to three hour nap, and I will still go to sleep just fine tonight.
Bill Gasiamis 23:53
On the right time as well. Yeah, wow. That just goes to show how much you need that nap to just get you past that fatigue that driving has caused. I love that, though, because it’s the perfect way to continue the rehab. We’ll call it rehab, right? It’s driving, but we’ll call it rehab because you’re driving, you’re doing something really hard for your brain, you’re putting it in a difficult situation, you’re fatiguing it, you’re tiring it out.
Bill Gasiamis 24:20
And then you give it what it needs to rehabilitate, to rest, to recuperate, and then you’re back at it again, and you feel recharged, and it helps you get through the rest of the day.
Tara Miller 24:32
Absolutely, absolutely I if I don’t nap or rest, there my husband can tell, I can tell, it’s, it’s not good. It’s, I do. I’ve had many strokes since my my stroke, and I think one of them was because I was. Overdoing it, but one of them actually just came out of nowhere, and it was as a stroke survivor. I was on the road to recovery. I was in year two. I thought everything was going fine and dandy.
Tara Miller 25:17
I was kind of feeling really good understanding this new path, understanding you’ve met Doug, understanding 2.0 trying to get to know her, and then, boom, I was hit with a mini stroke, and I thought, wow.
Bill Gasiamis 25:35
Just hard to accept.
Tara Miller 25:40
It was at first because I was just like, Why? Why? I don’t understand. I’m doing everything that I’m told to do. I’m following everything like I I’m just, I just don’t understand, why? Why? Me like I’ve already, I’ve already been through this. Why is this happening again, and why a mini stroke? So luckily for the support groups and the peers, it’s normal. And I was like, Okay, I guess it’s normal to have these little tias when you least expect them.
Bill Gasiamis 26:25
So, it’s just common. It’s common. It does happen normally. I don’t know about normal, but common. Yeah, and it’s a lot of people describe. There’s often a number of events afterwards. Sometimes there people have events that are kind of false alarms, but then also sometimes there are actual events. I was in a similar situation. My first two happened within six weeks of each other, the bleeds that happened in my head.
Bill Gasiamis 26:54
And then the next one happened, you know, a year and a half later, and it was the biggest setback, because that one there required brain surgery and then learning how to walk again and everything so that you do, you go through those ups, downs, then you go through, like, big ups, and then you go through downs. That’s kind of my journey was very jagged. It was not a straight line, that’s for sure.
Tara Miller 27:21
Yes, that’s you’ve explained that well. But I think because I was so up, it just it. It did bring me so down. And I think with the TIA, I felt my my speech did step back a lot. My aphasia comes out when I’m tired, or my speech is delayed when I get tired, and still to this day, but a lot of people don’t notice it because, well, they they do notice because I will start talking like slower or more delayed. But I found after the first Tia, or maybe the second one my speech did step back.
Tara Miller 28:25
So it was like I went to two feet forward, or two steps forward, and then 10 steps back. So like you said, that was a big adjustment for me, but now, because it’s been that was in 2003 that I had, Tia is and now it’s 2025, I’ve learned to just go with the flow. And I, I was a high, tense person pre stroke. I’m a calm person. Now, I wouldn’t say I’m like a hippie calm person, but I’m calmer, like there’s an improvement, there’s a huge improvement. So I can’t, I can’t let the little things bother me.
Bill Gasiamis 29:23
So you know this Tia that you experienced. Did you know that was happening, at least? Was there a warning sign? Did you do something about it?
Tara Miller 29:32
The first TIA, I did call 911 and I know I’m supposed to call all the time, so I’ll leave it at I do call 911, now, yes, I do. I’m supposed to check my blood pressure frequently because I have low blood pressure. So if I’m having a stroke, it will go very high, mm. Mm, so that day that I had, when I have my tias, they mirror the exact symptoms I had when I had a stroke. I have right side paralysis, I get dizzy, my vision gets blurred, and I have high blood pressure, and in both, in, in all the instances, like I can’t stand, like, because my whole right side is paralysis.
Fibromuscular Dysplasia And Stroke Follow-Up: Monitoring, Not Intervention
Bill Gasiamis 30:33
Okay, so, so what did they do to support the blood vessel that had dissected. Did they put a stent in there? What did they do with it?
Tara Miller 30:47
They just watch it okay, and you’re on. There’s been, there’s been no change in three years. So the big stroke was from my neck, and they won’t do anything like they’re just watching it, but there hasn’t been any change. The mini stroke was an artery between my brain and my skull. I can’t do anything.
Bill Gasiamis 31:23
Okay, so it was a new location.
Tara Miller 31:26
A new location. So they will, so I do go for scans yearly to make sure that one’s not doing anything. And then they also check my stomach. But, yeah, new location.
Bill Gasiamis 31:42
I see, okay, so you’re on a kind of like a regular scan, a regular, hospital visit, so that you guys can just keep everything monitored.
Tara Miller 31:57
Yes.
Bill Gasiamis 31:58
Okay.
Tara Miller 31:59
I’m very I feel very fortunate. I have a vascular specialist, and I have two neurologists, one that I see regular and then one that I asked to keep because he was the one that I saw at the hospital that I stayed in. The other neurologist. I was the one neurologist suggested me to. So he’s a top neurologist in in Ontario, like in Canada, so he’s a little farther away, but, like, I go to him every six months.
Bill Gasiamis 32:42
Yeah, so you know that idea of needing help and connecting with the stroke support groups, what was behind that? What were the issues that you needed to, I don’t know, get your head around and therefore you needed to connect with other stroke survivors.
Tara Miller 33:07
Actually, I didn’t even know there was programs available. I was at rehab after my stroke, and I found a poster that said Young stroke survivors. So I called or emailed.
Bill Gasiamis 33:25
Did you think you were young at 46 Yes, yes, some people think they’re old. Good. You at least thought you were young, cool.
Tara Miller 33:34
Well, young stroke survivor. I thought I’m a young stroke survivor, yeah, when I think of his when I and hopefully noone takes offense to this, because now that I’ve been open to the stroke worlds, I mean, stroke, strokes do not discriminate, they hit any age. But when free stroke, when I think of strokes, I thought of the movie. Oh, what movie is it? You know, with Brad Pitt when he’s in, his name’s Tristan, and his dad has a stroke.
Bill Gasiamis 34:15
Maybe someone can tell us in the comments. I don’t know, but you think of old people I know do 20 year olds Think of us as old people?
Tara Miller 34:24
Definitely. Well, I would think so. I think my daughter thinks I’m old and she’s 26.
Bill Gasiamis 34:32
Yeah. So when you get to 46 or 50 like I am, we’re still young, and we feel young and we are young, because the average age of an adult human being somewhere around 80 or something, or more, or the expected living age, I beg your pardon. So, yeah, I agree with you. I think we’re young.
Tara Miller 34:57
We’re I think we’re young to have strokes.
Bill Gasiamis 35:00
That’s it even more specific there, yep, okay.
Tara Miller 35:05
And I think, I think this poster said working age, young stroke survivors, working age. So I think that’s what caught my attention. Because I think a lot of people, and again, now that I’ve I’m a stroke survivor. It helped me. I wanted to to reach out to other survivors in and around my age to understand. Well, how are you coping? Mm, How are you coping with no license? How are you coping not going back to work? How are you coping with a teenage daughter or a young a young daughter, a young adult daughter, and now and now you’ve had a stroke?
Tara Miller 35:53
Because there’s some, there’s some peers that are retired. So some of the stroke stories are, well, I was retired when I had a stroke and I and I want to hear your story, but I don’t relate with you completely. I’m you’re at a different you’re at a different stage. I’m not retired yet, and I shouldn’t be retired yet. I’m like, I’m only 50 now. I had a stroke at 46 I still had 20 years of work, 20, and I’m not good with math, so let me do the math on that. And like math. Oh, I didn’t. I actually didn’t realize, and I laugh at it, how stroke could affect because I had a left side stroke.
Tara Miller 36:46
Math is gone. All gone. So when we talk numbers, I mean, I can add two plus two, but if you, if you, if you showed me like a spreadsheet, even a spreadsheet I did because, I mean, I did payroll, I would be amazed. I would be amazed by it.
Bill Gasiamis 37:11
So I know what you mean. I mean, I have a problem with maths, and it’s not the standard numerals and all that kind of stuff. You know, adding things, simple things. In my business, I can put quotes together, and I can develop a price for somebody. But if you give me something like a spreadsheet, I think it’s the again, I think it’s the sensory overload, like it actually triggers me. And I don’t normally get triggered by almost anything. I remember being in a meeting when I was when I wasn’t working in my business.
Bill Gasiamis 37:46
I had three years where I was working in an office, and the guy that I was working for was actually a friend of mine, and he was in charge of this particular department in this organization. And this guy is a numbers genius, like he’s a number savant. He can look at a spreadsheet and make it sing, and we’re sitting in a meeting, and he’s explaining to the team about this spreadsheet and how we’re going to use it, and all this kind of stuff. And I’m looking at it and it doesn’t I cannot gleam from that spreadsheet that it is going to.
Bill Gasiamis 38:20
I am going to be able to do what he said with that spreadsheet, just the amount of data, the numbers, was overwhelming, the lines, the brightness, the font, you know, like every single aspect of it, it was just completely overwhelming. I’d never felt overwhelmed to that extent before. I resigned on the spot that day. I said to him, this is the last day of work for you, because I cannot do the kind of work that you ask, because I cannot comprehend a spreadsheet with that much detail.
Bill Gasiamis 38:50
I physically cannot comprehend it my brain, and I know brains don’t have sensory neurons, but my brain hurts when you show me that spreadsheet, and you tell me to get information from it. It’s not possible.
Tara Miller 39:07
I know my mind is blown when I look at spreadsheets these days. And I used to build them, I used to do them, and I’m like, blown, and I can do simple math, but other math, I’m just like, oh, payroll, it’s and that’s why, obviously, I I’m not working at job I was doing before, because, like, I can’t.
Bill Gasiamis 39:33
If you give yourself some time to work out, say, a calculation of how much change you might get, you know, one of those basic calculations, how much change you might get from buying a loaf of bread, a carton of milk and all that type of thing. Are you able to do that?
Tara Miller 39:52
No, even you just saying that to me, like, I’m starting to get like, anxious.
Bill Gasiamis 40:00
Isn’t it interesting? Anxious? You said that. That’s what I felt, and that made me walk out of my job on that day.
Tara Miller 40:08
That made me anxious.
Bill Gasiamis 40:09
Wow, yeah. So, thank God for well, the supermarket machines that just work it all out for you, and you don’t have to think about it or worry about it.
Tara Miller 40:22
Well, exactly because I wouldn’t be able to make change there’s now when, when you were in the hospital, did you have to draw a clock?
Bill Gasiamis 40:35
I did once I did in my neuropsychological assessment, I definitely did, yes once, and I passed that one, I had no trouble during the clock. And I know where you’re going, so I’m going to ask you in a sec. But I think what they’re testing is to work out whether or not you have all of the left side and all of the right side of your brain’s functions. What was your test like? Sorry, to laugh. Because about an hour.
The Clock Test: A Stroke Survivor’s Recurring Challenge
Tara Miller 41:06
Definitely laugh because, like, the clock with the hands, like my, my kids would probably never be able to do it, because there’s not a lot of clock with hands anymore, but so in the hospital, I failed terribly. Well, that test came up again because I had to do the driver’s rehab assessment. I had to go through a rehab Assessment Center before I went to get my license. And it came up again. And I thought, What is this really coming up again? And I did get the big hands right, but I did not get the little hands right.
Tara Miller 41:45
And I thought to myself, this test is going to follow me around, and it’s and I cried in the hospital. I can remember well in the hospital. I mean, I didn’t do well on a lot of things, but that was like a few days after my stroke, but last two weeks ago, they were like, okay, draw a clock. And I looked at her and I said, What? Draw a clock with hands like this. That is my nightmare. So that’s why I have to pose a question, did you have to draw a clock? Because now I need to know, and I can’t remember if I drew a clock for my neural assessment, so I’m going to start practicing.
Bill Gasiamis 42:32
Yeah, maybe because if it keeps coming up.
Tara Miller 42:38
I did pass it, because I did get the main idea of where it all goes.
Bill Gasiamis 42:45
The numbers right. So you put the numbers. I didn’t get the numbers right and in order.
Tara Miller 42:49
I did get it right. I didn’t get the little number right.
Bill Gasiamis 42:54
So when they told you make eight o’clock, for example, you found the 12, but you couldn’t make the eight.
Tara Miller 43:01
Yeah, it was, No, I got the big numbers. So I got 3pm but I didn’t get like, 315 because then what happened? What happened is my payroll brain clicked on, and then I was like, I clicked into, like, look at it as a quarter. So I didn’t look at it as a clock. I looked at it as at a quarter. So yeah, it’s and she said, yeah, you passed anyways, like, I did get a point off for not getting the little hand.
Bill Gasiamis 43:32
But was not enough to restrict you from your license.
Tara Miller 43:39
That was just one part of the test that was just one question of the test. It’s a very in depth it’s a very in depth test, and it, I’m glad they do it, just because, I mean, I did have my license suspended for medical reasons. And, I mean, we did lots of brain brain tests, but I just can’t believe that one came up. Yeah, it was just like, oh, the hospital again.
Invisible Fibromuscular Dysplasia and Stroke Deficits and the Power of Peer Support
Bill Gasiamis 44:12
But sounds like you’ve had a bit of a turn from, you know, all the difficult times, the tough times and all that. Sounds like you’ve kind of shifted your mindset. Was there somebody that you met that encouraged you or that made a difference for you? How you know? When does that turn happen? How do you describe that?
Tara Miller 44:35
I think it’s a combination of all the people I’ve met and all the different groups. They’ve all their stories, all their milestones, the sadness and the happiness, just sharing our stories, sharing our updates, our happy stories, our sad stories. I think that helps me get through. I was explaining to my husband just the other day, actually, that there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about the stroke, and I don’t think he realizes that, like, there’s not a day that goes by.
Tara Miller 45:19
And he is an amazing caregiver. He’s been my number one supporter, my daughters, my family, everyone, my friends. I’ve been very fortunate, because I’ve actually heard like such sad stories, and I’ve been very fortunate and I’ve met amazing peers that have also had their ups and downs, but they’ve supported me and I’ve supported them, um, but I’m not saying it’s been an easy road. I I like my deficits are invisible. And it’s like that famous comment, oh, my God, you look so good. It’s almost in our groups, it’s we, kind of, we laugh at it now, because, thank you. I know.
Bill Gasiamis 46:12
It’s a cheap consolation prize. It’s not really anything. It’s not meaningful to hear that. I know it’s not intended in any way to be negative. I totally get it.
Tara Miller 46:26
No, it’s not. It’s actually supposed to be very thoughtful and an amazing compliment.
Bill Gasiamis 46:33
Yep, and uplift.
Tara Miller 46:34
But it’s in our groups, and that’s why we on in our groups. We’re always like, Oh, it’s the other Oh, you look so amazing. Yeah, my brain doesn’t though my brain is is like, so for me, I honestly, I can’t get sad about it. It is what it is and but I mean that in a positive way. I’m not looking at the stroke as being a positive thing, but I have to take the recovery positive. My life has changed, like I’m not the person I was. I can’t be that person is, is is kind of gone. I’m not fully, you know, as Doug says two point like, I’m not tear 2.0 yet, I’m still learning her.
Tara Miller 47:28
But I’m doing things now that I probably wouldn’t have done if I didn’t have a stroke, like, what? Well, I started horseback riding again, and I’m not, yeah, I know I do have medical clearance to do so I wouldn’t just jump on a horse. I mean, I haven’t ridden a horse since I was 19, and that 49 I’m like, let’s do this. Let’s do this, and I love it.
Bill Gasiamis 47:59
I bet.
Tara Miller 48:00
I’m not going to do anything silly, like, I’m not going to I’m not going back to the riding I did as a young like a child, early, early adult. But even just getting on the horse and walking and trotting. I mean, it’s, I love it, like my husband says, I’ve never seen you smile so much, and I don’t know if I would have taken that up again. If you’d asked me five years ago if I would pick up horseback riding, I would probably be like, No, I’m too old for that.
Tara Miller 48:33
And now I’m like, Yeah, I go horseback riding once a week. And I’m not like, I just, I love it. I I, and I’ve always wanted to learn how to knit. So I go to a knitting club or, yeah, I feel I want to knit.
Bill Gasiamis 48:57
Well, it’s so cool, it’s so useful and practical.
Tara Miller 49:01
Yeah, I want to knit blankets. I don’t know. I mean, I have enough blankets in the house, but I want to knit. And I think five years ago, I wouldn’t have taken the time to learn how to knit. I’ve asked my mom to show me, but it’s that’s a little different. Having someone you know, teach you, I think is very difficult, but I’ve learning to knit. I volunteer at the on the stroke ward at the hospital where I had a stroke. And I’m not saying I don’t know if I would have ever volunteered, but I enjoy it. I still haven’t found the word I want to use, but the way I explain it, it humbles me.
Bill Gasiamis 49:52
Yeah, it’s rewarding as well. Is it?
Tara Miller 49:55
Well, that’s it. It is really rewarding for me. It’s it. It’s like, I, I’m, I’m, it is, and that’s, I’m trying to find another word, because I don’t like how many strokes that are happening, yeah, like, it’s, it’s, it’s so sad. But I I say that we’ve all been invited to this. It’s an invite only club, even though we didn’t want the invite. Yeah, we’re here anyway, so we have to make the best of it.
Bill Gasiamis 50:34
Yeah, volunteering is really cool. I did that early on as well, quite a bit, yeah, probably the first three or four years and and then after the brain surgery, was a little bit harder to commit to volunteering. Just recovery took a bit longer than than I needed or wanted. And then not long after that, it was hard to get away from work, because I got back to work and then COVID. But volunteering was always supportive of me as well as that other person. That’s what I found. And my volunteering was for the Stroke Foundation.
Healing in the Saddle: Tara’s Journey with Sierra
Bill Gasiamis 51:09
And we were raising awareness, and we were meeting other stroke survivors, creating a community people I still catch up with and see. You know, 10 years later, because of that, and it’s really, it’s really rewarding. And like you, I don’t think I would have done any volunteering before stroke. I just wasn’t in that frame of mind. It wasn’t something that I thought was necessary for me to do. I understood the value of it, but I just didn’t think it was something for me.
Bill Gasiamis 51:40
So I like that you’ve taken up these, what old passions that you let go of because you got busy with work, being a mom and all that type of stuff, and now you’re thinking, Well, what have I got to lose or go horseback riding? Is it easy to access to get to a horse riding club from your place.
Tara Miller 52:03
Oh yes, I live in the country. Oh yeah, yeah, I live in the country.
Bill Gasiamis 52:07
And you get to ride the same horse every week, or is it a different horse?
Tara Miller 52:13
It’s funny. I met my instructor actually had a brain injury, so we’re perfect for each other, as far as I’m concerned. And her horse, Sierra was like, literally, my my soulmate horse, and she was the perfect horse for me to ride. She’s just she, she’s just an angel. And it was like meant to be for for me to be her, her rider, and she had other other students, but it was the perfect horse for me to learn how to ride on again. And we were doing well.
Tara Miller 53:00
And we were, we were actually getting ready to practice for a possible horse show, just walk, trot, horse show this May and in January, unrelated to stroke, I had just real weird stuff happens to me. I had a cleft lung Just out of nowhere. Yeah, clefts a partial collapse lung, and then pneumonia. So, yeah, it’s very bizarre, very bizarre. Out of nowhere, and I had to take, obviously, several weeks off. And so my horse, Kiera, then we found out that so she has some leg problems, and I don’t really, I don’t know the medical term, but she has retired.
Tara Miller 54:00
She had to go into early retirement because of her legs are not getting better, and it’s just like I was broken and then she was broken. So that’s my story about Sierra, who literally was my sole horse. And I’ve ridden a million horses. I’ve loved a million horses. I’ve had horses, but Sierra and I, we were meant to be together for that short little stint. Yeah, from and she’s going to be as her her mom says, pasture potato now, yep, and she deserves to be beautiful horse.
Tara Miller 54:40
So now I’m going to be riding Scarlet, because I don’t, I’m, I’m of the age in the and I’m delicate where I can’t just get on any horse, yeah. Um, so that was a great question, but Sierra and I, we jived like she knew it was me on her. Yeah, and it’s very heartbreaking, but we, I mean, I’m, I’m heartbroken, so you can imagine what her mom is going through after having her for 13 years. But I’m now riding in scarlet. Is an Arabian horse. Beautiful, beautiful face. So I’ve only ridden her once because I had to take some time off. Do you do my collapse?
Bill Gasiamis 55:28
Yeah, tell me about that. What’s also, what about, how does that even happen? And how do you collapse lung?
Tara Miller 55:34
Well, I was horseback riding, and that’s not I already had it. The collapsed lung had already been there, and I was just out of breath. And I said to my instructor, I feel like I am out of breath a lot more. And she said, yeah, you seem barely out of breath this time. And then I just went to an urgent care and I thought I had pneumonia, and they said, No, your your your chest is clear, but go get an x ray like something’s going on.
Tara Miller 56:09
And then they called me, and they said, Yeah, you have a partial collapsed lung. Go to the hospital. So I went to the hospital and waited and waited and waited and waited, and the doctor said, yeah, you have a partial collapsed lung. We need to do chest tube.
Bill Gasiamis 56:33
To reinflate it.
Tara Miller 56:35
Yeah.
Bill Gasiamis 56:36
Wow.
Tara Miller 56:37
It was horrible.
Bill Gasiamis 56:38
Did you have like, a rock bottom moment. Did you get to the stage where you’re thinking, oh my god, what is going on? This is really. Was there a moment like that? No, no, that’s all right. That’s good.
Tara Miller 56:50
I was just like, really, really, like, I’ve gone through one major throat, stroke, three tias, one hospital stay like, or like, two hospital stays. Now collapsed lung, it’s partial collapse lung. And then a week after that, then I had pneumonia, which I got from the collapsed lung, or partial collapsed lung, but they said they don’t know why or how I got it mostly come like that type of collapse, long comes from very tall, lanky men that are runners and I’m like, I’m Five two, I’m not lanky, I’m not a man, so help me out here, like we got nothing.
Bill Gasiamis 57:48
That’s an interesting explanation to give to somebody that’s the exact opposite of all those things.
Tara Miller 57:53
But the exact opposite. So I was like, Okay, I’m gonna go on my way then. So luckily, I didn’t have to my my lung did reinforce, and I did not have to leave the hospital with the test tube, chest tube, test tube. So I’m happy for that. I do not encourage anyone to get a chest tube. I did not know what it was going to feel like. It’s not something I recommend. It’s horrible. But I just, I went with the flow.
Bill Gasiamis 58:32
What do they do? Put a hole through the front of your chest, into your lung.
Tara Miller 58:36
In this side.
Bill Gasiamis 58:38
My gosh. I actually have never seen through the ribs type of thing.
Tara Miller 58:42
Correct. I’ve never seen a chest tube be inserted, prior to this, this little incident, and since then, I’ve seen it done maybe five times on on medical shows. And I’m like, oh, and it’s, it’s not it’s it does hurt. There’s nothing they can really give to you that really stops all the pain.
Bill Gasiamis 59:09
It’s always feel it right. Okay, so you’ve had quite the journey. How have you changed, not just physically, but also emotionally and mentally. How do you see yourself these days?
Tara Miller 59:28
I think I’m happier.
Bill Gasiamis 59:32
I do. That’s not what I was expecting you to say. That’s cool.
Tara Miller 59:38
I but I have my moments.
Bill Gasiamis 59:41
Everyone does, right, but you’re happier, generally, happier and calmer. I am. That’s a great I am happy to arrive to what are you happy about?
Tara Miller 59:53
I just I don’t take life for granted. I don’t take anything for granted anymore. Mm, I, you know the sayings top smell the flowers like I literally do. I stop and look at birds on my walk. Mm, I never thought I’d stop and look at birds, but I do, because they’re pretty, and that’s something in my previous life. I don’t think I ever would because I didn’t have the time, because I was Go, go, go. And the stroke, just it.
Tara Miller 1:00:29
It stopped everything. It put me in my like, it just it, well, it scared me, scared everyone. It’s scary. It’s but it, I didn’t die. I could have died, but I didn’t. I was given, I look, I was given another chance.
Bill Gasiamis 1:00:51
Sounds like it’s changed you in a very meaningful way, this experience that you’ve had with your health the last few years.
Tara Miller 1:00:59
I think it has. I wish little things would stop happening. Like, I don’t need a partial collapse long again. No one needs that. Yeah, we’ll just like, I don’t need those. Like, I do have to work. I do have to work at when I go out. I mean, I do rest up for functions. There are behind the scenes stuff, as you probably know, to get ready for big functions or just to go out. I do prepare. I do prepare when it’s time to go horseback riding, like I will sleep the day before, little longer, or I’ll rest the day before I don’t, I try not to do back to back stuff because I can’t.
Bill Gasiamis 1:01:45
Yeah, can relate to that.
Tara Miller 1:01:48
So there’s a lot of behind the scenes to make something happen.
Bill Gasiamis 1:01:55
And then usually the next day after horseback riding, is that a rest day as well?
Tara Miller 1:02:00
Yes. Actually, even after horseback riding out like my naps are closer to four hours.
Bill Gasiamis 1:02:07
Yeah.
Tara Miller 1:02:08
It’s, but it’s exhilarating while it’s happening, and then it’s nap time.
Bill Gasiamis 1:02:17
Have you noticed that improving that nap times are changing that they’re are they sometimes not even needed naps, or are they always needed?
Tara Miller 1:02:27
Still, they were improving, definitely improving, where I could probably just go have a quiet, you know, lie in the bed and just have quiet time until I got my license, and now I’m back to I need them.
Quieting the Mind: Tara on Naps and Brain Fatigue
Bill Gasiamis 1:02:45
Okay, so you’re starting to put your brain in a little bit of discomfort by going for a drive, and it’s going, alright, I need a rest. Now, you know, there this whole discussion around naps reminds me of the kids when they were little, you know, and then suddenly they don’t need to nap anymore. And what do you mean? You don’t need to nap. You do need to nap. You’re going to be grumpy at the end of the day and them insisting that I need to nap, and then me insisting, and my wife insisting that you have to nap because now you’re ruining our plans for the day.
Bill Gasiamis 1:03:18
Or we we were used to your napping routine, we would get some quiet time. You know, it reminds me of those conversations when I was talking about friends with friends and family, about kids nap time and how it’s changed, and how they eventually stopped needing it. But this kind of reminds me of a similar thing, where you have a lot of need now, but as the years and time progresses and the healing continues, that it should get less and less, but it doesn’t seem like you mind napping. You seem to quite enjoy the opportunity to go and have a rest and a nap.
Tara Miller 1:03:55
I do, especially if I’ve had a big day out or something and naps were getting better and not needed, as much like you said, until I started driving and I noticed a huge I do need to at least go lie down or a quiet time, listen to relaxing music, spa music, just to quiet my head.
Bill Gasiamis 1:04:21
I know now for me, sometimes it’s probably a nap is probably not necessary, but that just lying down and listening to chill music or something like that dark room is enough to recharge the brain battery. And I really do look forward to it as well. And I love having nothing to do after something eventful, whatever it is, whether it’s going to the football or going to a concert or going out on the town, just enough to have nothing to do afterwards, just to chill out and it’s kind of like my time to decompress and appreciate.
Bill Gasiamis 1:05:00
At what I’ve just seen and done and reflect on it, instead of getting onto the next busy thing and going and going and going, is there something that you so the stroke survivors watching and listening, they’re probably not at this stage of your journey, or they might be Before this stage. What would you like to say to them about the journey and about stroke recovery?
Tara Miller 1:05:30
The journey is, well, I’ve I’ve said this to the survivors in the hospital, that it’s a slow process, and I like to say, and sloth is one of my favorite animals, along with horses, cats and dogs and dolphins, like just sitting with you, but and all of them, and all the animals, oh yeah, birds, birds are my favorite too. But it’s, it’s, it’s a sloth, sloth space, it really is and you can’t make it go faster, and you have to go with the flow. And every and every journey is different. Every stroke is different, every journey is different, and to have patience. I never had patience.
Tara Miller 1:06:24
I think I have more patience now than I’ve ever had before. My older daughter has said, You’re not the mom, you’re not the mom you were to Abby than you that you were to me like you’re different mom, and I’m like, I’m a different person, though, and it’s of no fault to my own. Like, I’m sorry that I’m different. It’s different times. And she’s like, Abby gets away with everything. And I’m like, Well, I have to pick my battles. I don’t right. Like, I was more uptight then I can’t. I don’t care that Abby’s room is dirty like I don’t I did when Alex was young.
Tara Miller 1:07:08
So that’s just an example. I picked my bottles now, when you’re raising kids, because I can’t let the little things bother me like I did the stroke recovery is, is kind of my first priority. I know it’s hard to say, Yeah, but I do. I do put myself first. Yep, the recovery is first, and it’s slow, but it can be, it is rewarding. The milestones are rewarding. And there’s good days, bad days, happy days, sad days. But you just, it’s an invite only club. Even though you didn’t want the invite, you just, you have to accept it and go with the flow.
Bill Gasiamis 1:08:02
So it sounds like your child is noticing the different in your behavior and then is comparing, as all kids do, comparing themselves to how you treated one sibling as opposed to the other one, and is going, you should be stricter on the other sibling of mine correct to even out the playing field so I can feel like I got a little bit of revenge back, or some equality in treatment or something. I totally get that from a kid’s perspective.
Tara Miller 1:08:35
Well, they’re 10 years apart.
Parenting Through Fibromuscular Dysplasia and Stroke: Missed Moments and Long-Term Understanding
Bill Gasiamis 1:08:39
It’s completely different times, yeah, but they don’t understand that.
Tara Miller 1:08:43
No, and I mean, I’m, I’m a little easier on I just, I feel when I had my stroke, was it a very imperative time for my younger one. She just turned like she was starting grade eight, crucial time for a young girl like needed her mom to drive her here, there and everywhere, and then, boom, her mom’s in. I felt like I was in bed for one year. I literally felt like all I did was lie in bed and order Uber Eats.
Bill Gasiamis 1:09:21
Yeah, yeah. I remember missing out on stuff that we should have done, quote, unquote, should have done with my youngest as well, camping, fishing, that kind of stuff that we just couldn’t make it happen. And now that they haven’t happened, he’s 24 trying to get him into the zone, to come to an event with me so I can relive something I should have done with him 10 years ago, like it just doesn’t happen. But I totally get where you’re coming from, number one has to be you, because if you’re not well, then you can’t be.
Bill Gasiamis 1:09:59
But you can’t participate in your child’s life in any way, and maybe not at all. You might not be around. So what’s the point of that? You have to make a sacrifice. But when they’re little, they don’t understand the sacrifices that adults make. I remember my oldest son, who’s 28 now it would have been about three or four years ago, come to me and say he kind of had a deep realization as to what I went through and how bad it really was.
Bill Gasiamis 1:10:30
And it took him eight or nine years to get to that stage, to actually, you know, where he grew up, he became mature, and he had a different view on life. And he really kind of came to me one day and he goes, I think I just really understood now what happened and what you went through. So it’s kind of good that they don’t know that they’re a little bit ignorant the kids sometimes, and that they think you’re just being a mean mum, or you don’t treat me the same as the other one.
Bill Gasiamis 1:11:02
The usual kids stuff. That’s like, if it’s that, if we’re still at that stage in life where they still assume that they’re just being unfairly treated because they’re the most important what they want is the most important thing in the world. I think that’s a good space to be, but Oh, absolutely, it comes with a bit of a cost. That’s what I felt. And it sounds like you’ve experienced similar conversations where.
Tara Miller 1:11:29
Abby was home when I had the stroke, so she was a part of it. She was here. She was saw me. Her face looked just as scared as my husband’s, and I was kind of like, what is going on? Alex at school. Yes, so two different and Abby lives here. Abby deals with me, um, daily. She deals with mom recovering from a stroke. Alex does it so it’s Abby’s gonna get to have a messy room if she wants.
Small Wins, Big Heart: Tara’s Stroke Recovery Journey
Bill Gasiamis 1:12:15
And so Alex is dealing with the but you look fine version. Yep, didn’t see the ill part, the serious part at that time I hear, yeah, it makes complete sense. Hey, Tara, thank you so much for reaching out. I really appreciate you coming on the show and sharing the story, and I wish you well in your recovery ongoing. And thank you. Have a lovely time with your animals.
Tara Miller 1:12:42
Thank you. Thanks for having me, Bill. It was very fun.
Bill Gasiamis 1:12:46
Well, that’s it for another episode of the Recovery After Stroke Podcast. Some stories don’t end with a miracle moment. They unfold slowly, like Tara’s, through setbacks, surprises and small wins that all add up. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this episode in the comments. What part of Tara’s story resonated most with you? Let’s keep this space where stroke survivors feel seen, and if you want to go deeper, and if you want to go deeper, check out my book. The Unexpected Way That A Stroke Became The Best Thing That Happened.
Bill Gasiamis 1:13:19
If you’ve ever struggled with meaning after stroke, this book was written for you. You’ll find stories, tools and circuit breakers to help you shift. Check it out at recoveryafterstroke.com/book, to support the show. Hit the super thanks button on YouTube or join the Patreon community. And if something in this episode moved you don’t keep it to yourself, share it with someone who might need it, and remember, slow progress is still progress. See you in the next episode.
Intro 1:13:49
Importantly, we present many podcasts designed to give you an insight and understanding into the experiences of other individuals. Opinions and treatment protocols discussed during any podcast are the individual’s own experience, and we do not necessarily share the same opinion, nor do we recommend any treatment protocol discussed all content on this website and any linked blog, podcast or video material controlled this website or content is created and produced for informational purposes only and is largely based on the personal experience of Bill Gasiamis.
Intro 1:14:19
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Intro 1:14:43
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