Finding Your Voice After Stroke: A Musician’s Journey Through Aphasia and Recovery
Recovering speech after a stroke can be a long and frustrating journey. For many stroke survivors, Aphasia—a condition that affects speech and language abilities—becomes one of the biggest hurdles in rehabilitation. But is it possible to regain speech and rebuild confidence in communication?
Graham Hall, a professional musician, faced this exact challenge after his ischemic stroke left him struggling to form words and recognize his own voice. His story sheds light on the emotional, mental, and physical challenges of Aphasia while offering hope and actionable strategies for stroke survivors working to regain speech.
Understanding Stroke and Speech Challenges
When a stroke affects the left side of the brain, it can disrupt the areas responsible for speech and language. This can lead to Aphasia, causing:
- Difficulty forming words or sentences
- Trouble understanding speech
- Problems with reading and writing
- Inability to recognize familiar sounds or voices
Graham’s stroke affected his ability to speak fluently. He described feeling disconnected from his own voice as if what he said wasn’t quite right. Like many stroke survivors, he also faced mental fatigue, as every word required extra effort to process and express.
The Mental Fatigue of Regaining Speech
For Graham, every conversation felt like double the work—first thinking of the words, then questioning whether they were correct. This constant mental effort caused exhaustion.
“Even though my speech is much better than it was, it’s still mentally and physically draining.”
This is common for stroke survivors with speech deficits. The brain works hard to reroute neural pathways, using neuroplasticity to regain lost abilities. But this process is tiring and requires consistent practice to improve.
Tips to Reduce Speech Fatigue:
✅ Take breaks between conversations to allow your brain to rest.
✅ Speak slowly and focus on clear pronunciation.
✅ Use assistive tools like text-to-speech apps or visual cues.
✅ Engage in speech therapy exercises daily to strengthen language skills.
✅ Practice mindfulness and relaxation techniques to reduce stress.
Why Some Words Are Harder to Say After Stroke
A surprising challenge for Graham was spelling and recalling words without visual representation. For example, he found it easy to spell “ball” because he could visualize it, but he struggled with abstract words like “done” or “jury” because they didn’t have clear images in his mind.
This is because the brain processes visual and language information together. When speech is impaired, having a mental image of a word can help in recalling and pronouncing it.
How to Improve Word Recall:
🎤 Use association techniques – Link a difficult word to an image or memory.
📖 Write words repeatedly – Handwriting strengthens connections in the brain.
🗣️ Read aloud daily – This helps reinforce word formation and recognition.
🎼 Use rhythm and music – Singing words can be easier than speaking them.
Graham used musical techniques like rhyming and rhythm to retrain his speech patterns, tapping into his past skills as a musician to help his recovery.
The Emotional Toll of Speech Loss After Stroke
For many stroke survivors, speech challenges lead to frustration, isolation, and loss of confidence. Graham shared that some friends drifted away because conversations became difficult.
“Some people stopped talking to me. Maybe they didn’t know how to interact with me anymore.”
This is a common experience, but it doesn’t mean stroke survivors should give up on communication. Building a supportive environment is crucial for speech recovery.
How to Overcome Social Barriers in Speech Recovery:
💬 Be patient with yourself – Progress takes time, and small improvements matter.
🗣️ Educate others about Aphasia – Many people don’t understand it. Help them learn.
👥 Join a support group – Connecting with other stroke survivors can boost confidence.
🎙️ Practice speaking daily – Even small conversations help strengthen speech abilities.
🧠 Use alternative communication methods – Gestures, writing, or assistive apps can help.
The Role of Neuroplasticity in Speech Recovery
Neuroplasticity is the brain’s ability to rewire itself after injury. This is why stroke survivors can regain lost abilities with practice. Speech recovery doesn’t stop after a few months—it can continue for years.
Graham emphasized that consistency is key:
“If you don’t practice, your speech will get worse. You have to keep going, every day.”
Even 14 years after his stroke, he continues to practice and refine his speech.
Best Practices for Speech Recovery Using Neuroplasticity:
🔹 Daily speech therapy exercises – Apps like Tactus Therapy or Speech Assistant can help.
🔹 Reading and repeating words – Reinforces memory and pronunciation.
🔹 Conversational practice – Engage in slow, structured conversations.
🔹 Listening to familiar voices – Helps reconnect brain pathways.
🔹 Using music and rhythm – Singing helps retrain speech patterns.
Aphasia Recovery: What Graham Wants Other Stroke Survivors to Know
Graham’s story highlights an important truth: speech recovery is a journey, not a destination. It’s a process of constant learning, practice, and adaptation.
Here’s his advice for others struggling with speech after a stroke:
💡 Never stop practicing – Even if progress feels slow, keep going.
💡 Find what works for you – Whether it’s music, writing, or visual cues, use what helps.
💡 Be patient – Speech recovery is mentally exhausting, but improvement is possible.
💡 Stay connected – Don’t let communication barriers stop you from engaging with others.
Final Thoughts: You Are More Than Your Speech Challenges
Losing the ability to communicate after a stroke can feel devastating, but it doesn’t define you. As Graham’s story shows, with persistence and the right strategies, it is possible to rebuild speech, confidence, and connection.
If you or a loved one are on this journey, know that you are not alone. Stroke recovery is about progress, not perfection. Keep practicing, stay patient, and surround yourself with people who support you.
Finding Your Voice After Stroke: A Musician’s Journey Through Aphasia and Recovery
After his stroke, musician Graham Hall struggled with speech. In this inspiring story, he shares his journey through Aphasia and recovery.
Graham Hall’s Websites:
ghmusicprep.com
grahamhall.bandcamp.com
LinkedIn
Highlights:
00:00 Graham Hall’s Introduction and Background
04:13 Graham’s Stroke Experience
14:07 Challenges of Aphasia and Therapy
23:15 Impact of Stroke on Daily Life and Relationships
26:47 Adapting to New Roles and Passions
35:20 Precision, Passion, and the Orchestra’s Role
43:54 The Power of Music
52:52 Overcoming Spatial Challenges in Music After Stroke
1:05:01 The Role of Music in Recovery
1:24:38 Lessons Learned from Stroke
1:30:55 Advice for Other Stroke Survivors
1:35:21 Final Thoughts and Reflections
Transcript:
Graham Hall’s Introduction and Background
Bill Gasiamis 0:00
Hello everyone, and welcome to another episode of the Recovery After Stroke Podcast, whether you’re tuning in on YouTube, Apple Podcast, Spotify, or anywhere else, thank you for being here. Your support makes these conversations possible, and I truly appreciate it. Before we dive into today’s episode, I wanted to give a shout out to Kim, our latest Patreon supporter. Your contribution, Kim, helps keep this podcast running and reach more stroke survivors. Today, we have a fascinating conversation with Graham Hall.
Bill Gasiamis 0:33
A professional musician whose life changed when he experienced a stroke that left him with aphasia. He opens up about the mental fatigue of communication, how he adapted his speech recovery using music, and what it feels like when you can’t recognize your own voice anymore.
Bill Gasiamis 0:51
And for those of you watching on YouTube, our channel is growing fast. 320 new subscribers roughly every month, and we’re on track to hit 5000 subscribers in under a month. If you’re new, make sure to subscribe and be a part of the growing community. Now, let’s get into Graham’s incredible journey. Graham Hall, welcome to the podcast.
Graham Hall 1:18
Hi, Bill. It’s good to see you, actually, and to hear you, because your head, who has been my mind for the last, well, actually since 6 years, I think, when did you start this podcast.
Bill Gasiamis 1:34
You know what, I started, I think I made the most effort in the podcast, probably after 2015, 2016 something like that. And it really, yeah, it really took off, probably after 2017, 2018 somewhere there.
Graham Hall 1:54
I was a podcast. It was a Google podcast on or Google sounds, or that, as it was then, and I think I found your show by that, because you have a conversation with Mike Mezenich, and Peter Levine, so that sort of timeline.
Bill Gasiamis 2:25
Mike Mezenich was an amazing interview. I met Mike in Melbourne and asked him if he would be on my podcast. And he said, Yes. That was very early, and he was great. Peter Levine passed away a couple of years ago.
Graham Hall 2:45
Yeah, I heard that, yeah. I’ve got the second version of his book. Because the third version, I think it was, which I’ve got the hardback version of that really good book, actually an easy read, but it’s quite brilliant, but all the information was there for me to read and think about what’s happened.
Bill Gasiamis 3:17
Yeah, as somebody who was helping stroke survivors, his book was so well written, and he was so knowledgeable, he understood things that so many people who work with stroke survivors and haven’t had a stroke don’t understand. And I found his interview really fascinating.
Graham Hall 3:42
Yeah, and because, I think what was interesting is because he was a drummer, which is me, so and some of the things he said about how the brain works and the music and how now, particularly, our drummers can sort really great damage for me now, it was helpful, it’s great.
Graham’s Stroke Experience
Bill Gasiamis 4:13
Actually, tell me a little bit about what happened to you.
Graham Hall 4:18
Well, it’s 10 years ago, just over 10 years and I just woke up and I had a stroke. I don’t know whether it happened whilst I was sleeping, but I awoke and I can’t talk, and felt in the fall. But the ambulance was there quite quickly into the local hospital. And therefore, two weeks, three weeks, and it just a boot cut, my left clotted artery, and they think it’s because merely a slight high level of cholesterol, but nothing. I’d never smoke, never drunk. It’s just bad luck, I guess.
Bill Gasiamis 5:37
Yeah, to me, fair enough that could be the case also. So I can tell by the way that you speak that there is some kind of deficit there. When you left hospital, what were the deficits that you had to recover from and deal with?
Graham Hall 6:00
Well, it was obviously the problem. Everything was my right side, but it gets better and better actually, obviously physical therapy in the hospital and afterwards, but for aphasia and therapy. I did that for seven months, which is a I actually mean I say that it was only two or three days a week for five months, and it gladly goes less and stopped after 6, 7, 8 months. And actually, the guy, the woman, is languishing therapy, a woman was fantastic, actually, and I don’t think, from what I heard now, that will happen, that will not happen now in England.
Graham Hall 7:07
Now, with that sort of length of therapy, maybe two weeks, maybe a month, and then, because funding, it gives less and less and less. No, I was quite lucky, really at that time. But because, my free life, and still I get was a drummer. I used to work for a opera company in Leeds called North, and I was there. I started them in 93 actually, four time. And so quite helpful to help me get back to some playing. So it was off work for six months, and then gradually, sort of small concerts. Or rehearsals, but I decided to stop.
Graham Hall 7:07
Not because I didn’t enjoy being in the environments of Opera North as I didn’t get enjoyment by playing for music. And it was strange, because the first time I was back trying to find back, there was a kids concert, school concert, and there’s a rehearsal there. And of course, when you’re playing percussion, you got to move left to right and loud and soft. And that was quite hard, really, because I couldn’t find which side of the the stage will be the bass drum or the symbols.
Graham Hall 9:30
But everyone was liking the fact they were playing. But it takes, what? Why? Why do I not like now? Because before it was my like, from 14 of age, I like music. It. Is my life. And then suddenly there was, there was no enjoyment, no from the the music itself. I mean, I heard it quite clearly, and I know where it could be and stop until like that, and then it was a conductor and queuing, this is like that, but there’s no job by playing it.
Bill Gasiamis 10:36
I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you to all our podcast listeners, whether you’re on a morning walk in the car or relaxing at home, I appreciate you being a part of this journey. If you’re finding value in the conversation. Here are a few ways you can stay connected and support the show. Join the conversation in the YouTube comments, there are many stroke survivors and caregivers there sharing insights and asking great questions.
Bill Gasiamis 11:07
Check out Graham’s work at ghmusicprep.com and grahamhall.bandcamp.com, he has created some amazing music inspired by his experience with aphasia. You’ll find links later on in the show notes. Also, you can support the podcast on Patreon, just like Kim did. Your support will help keep the content coming and provides resources for the stroke community. All right, let’s get back to Graham’s story. So you lost your passion?
Graham Hall 11:45
Not the passion, because I’m still, obviously, I’m still working with music, and I’ve played since then, obviously, and actually, before lockdown stopped, started. There was a season where they did a opera called La Boheme by Bucha. So I played the part I was playing for 30 years this production use was played every two or three years.
Graham Hall 12:26
So I played in the pit, playing off stage and and marching into the stage, going back to the stage, doing some bells going back, and because I’ve done that, I knew exactly where everything should be, but when I played, there was no feedback for how that sound would be heard by anyone to do that, so I got to check that they could sing, “Is that correct?” “Yes, that’s fine.” But I can’t get that feedback to sensory feedback, I guess from the actual name.
Bill Gasiamis 13:21
I’m getting the feedback from the instrument when you’re playing, and therefore you can’t experience the feeling of whether you’re nailed it or not.
Graham Hall 13:34
Yeah. I mean, I think, and actually, when lockdown was just stopped, there’s some rehearsals. Rather, you’d be with everyone played about six feet away from each other, because of lockdown. You’ve got the screens looked like that because of COVID. And I think I was talking to them, and say,well, that you’ll say, well, that’s hard for them to play with people five feet away.
Stroke and Speech: Challenges of Aphasia and Therapy
Graham Hall 14:07
But I was saying “Well, that’s exactly what’s happened to me.” Even though you’re playing next to me, there’s something, there’s like a booth going in there. But, yeah, so it was a way of making sense of what’s happened to me, I guess.
Bill Gasiamis 14:32
Yeah. Do you feel like it’s a vision? Is it a physical disconnect? Is it an auditory disconnect?
Graham Hall 14:41
No, it’s all, it’s audit all the time. Yeah, I mean, because aphasia is just, that’s what it is. It’s the auditory problem, I have the deficits. So even though, when I talk to you now, I don’t think that my voice is clear to me.
Bill Gasiamis 15:06
So your voice when you hear it in your own head as you’re speaking, sounds unfamiliar.
Graham Hall 15:16
A bit, yeah. I was talking to some student doctors 50 days ago about aphasia and I said “Well, it’s hard for me to to say what’s happened to me.” Because I’m not sure whether the words I’m saying is correct every second I’ve got to rethink what I’ve just said, and then it goes on and on. Now it’s it comes a bit better, but in the earlier days and early years, I’ve got to rewind what I’ve just tried to say. Does that makes sense?
Bill Gasiamis 16:02
Yeah, everybody, yeah. It sounds like you’re doing twice the work once to develop the sentence, and then you’re saying the sentence, but then you’re also questioning the sentence.
Graham Hall 16:17
Yeah, exactly. And I always question everything I’ve seen actually, although it feels a bit easier and more automatic, I guess, but it’s, it’s still, as I say, it’s quite it’s physically and mentally. But it’s mentally and physically fatigued by it. If that makes sense. So it’s no problem with the physical side of it. But of course, you know, as I always know now.
Graham Hall 17:07
That even though you’re not talking, the brain is always working and then you got to make sure that you’re not going to have some time to not think about it at all. Otherwise you can’t stop, but the brain doesn’t want to stop.
Bill Gasiamis 17:30
So it’s a cognitive challenge that you face. You’re facing that you’re trying to give the brain less work to do, but it’s wanting to do it, and that, in turn, creates more fatigue, because you’re doing double the work to get one line out or one sentence out or a conversation out.
Graham Hall 17:57
Yeah, I mean, I talked to the student doctors two days ago for a morning session, but when I get home, that was just wiped out new to be, which is great, because it’s good for me to talk to other people about aphasia, because doctors actually, all these student doctors, they’ve never really heard about it. I mean, they heard of aphasia a bit, and they called it Dysphasia. What was the word that was, it’s American term.
Bill Gasiamis 18:45
Dysphasia.
Graham Hall 18:47
Yeah, dysphasia, but again they don’t know anything more than that word, they don’t know how many types of aphasia, it’s just like that.
Bill Gasiamis 19:08
It’s so complex. Aphasia is so complex, and it’s interesting to come across people that have experienced aphasia in different ways. Some people you couldn’t tell that they have aphasia, but they will tell you that concentrating on a conversation is difficult. And then there’s the people who are very early on in their recovery. I imagine that you would have taken a lot longer to complete a sentence 14 years ago.
Graham Hall 19:44
Yeah, although, I for.
Bill Gasiamis 19:46
10 years ago.
Graham Hall 19:47
Yeah, but I mean every year since then, I’ve done some research on the Manchester University, there’s a department for aphasia and the language disorders in Manchester and in Cambridge. And I’ve done six or seven studies by postgraduate students from different types of problems for the furniture. But all the basic tests are the same, the Boston naming tests and the other one in America, Boston and the other one, anyway.
Bill Gasiamis 20:41
So is, as is your aphasia also linked to memory issues, or there’s no memory issues?
Graham Hall 20:50
I don’t think it was a memory really, I don’t know exactly. Well, I would say, well, in a sense, it’s just the memory of sound.
Bill Gasiamis 21:04
Okay.
Graham Hall 21:05
Because, although my speech is much better than it was previous, if I was trying to say a words like, I parked my car right? I parked P, R, A, R, K, E, D.
Bill Gasiamis 21:48
Okay.
Graham Hall 21:49
So, I know the word is, I know what it means, but I can’t spell that word because I’ve lost the sound of that word.
Bill Gasiamis 21:59
I seemed like the word the letter that you were stuck on for the longest amount of time. So you said P, and then you went to R, because A and R do make a sound. So you missed A, and then you went to R, got K, E and D. I see. Okay, so comprehension is not an issue. Memory is not an issue, making the developing or having the ability to discern at that moment the separation between the A and the R, is where the challenge lies, like, there’s a little bit of a kind of a disconnect there.
Bill Gasiamis 22:48
And then, with enough time, though you are able to recall that there’s an A after the P and before the R, and then you can combine it. But that is the part where you have to use more cognition to think about, and then that doing that for every word, or every second word or every third word, would make a conversation challenging and tiring.
Impact of Stroke And Speech on Daily Life and Relationships
Graham Hall 23:14
Yeah, I mean the actual I think my speech is much better than it was, but it’s still the problem with writing or texting, I mean, I put it now, but just a word like, done, D, U N, E, done, well done. There isn’t a visual word for done, and I thought I could do it now, but I used to think my work is done. No idea how to spell with done, and it took me 20 minutes to write done, and like jury, as in the jury with a court.
Graham Hall 24:23
The jury, but jury, there’s a J somewhere, and the U, R, Y, but now, and it’s still the problem with small prepositional words, so with have at B, when were is quite WH, so “what” Sounds are particularly hard to get round to it.
Bill Gasiamis 25:05
So what I’m hearing as well, I think, is that ball, which is something that you can actually visualize. There you have more reference points to develop the word, because you know what a ball looks like, and you can remember that, and you can attach it to the word, to the letters, and then you can say that, but “Done.” There isn’t an image for Done. What does done look like?
Bill Gasiamis 25:39
And therefore you haven’t got the visual representation of the word that you can quickly associate attached to the sound, and then also, Jury the J doesn’t sound like a J. It can sound like a D. It can sound like a D, depending on which part of the world you’re from and therefore it kind of throws a little spanner in the works there about the way the word is developed in your mind before you express it in words.
Graham Hall 26:14
I mean, the way I do it round is by like done. I’ll say son, and they were stunned. Well, not because Sun done, so, Sun Done Fun, trying to get away to say D, Q, N or A, N, given by the word.
Bill Gasiamis 26:43
So the work around a little longer.
Adapting to New Roles and Passions
Graham Hall 26:47
Yes, but I always like before stroke. I always like rhyming words. So people like and people white, and people write songs like Tom LEHRER And Stephen Sondheim, and wordsmiths like that level. So I was quite happy to find new words, new rhymes or other old songs. So by using that, I can use my new life to make it sense to making by having my old skills, if you like, particularly my new life.
Bill Gasiamis 27:47
Since you adapted your old ability into supporting the new way that talking occurs for you.
Graham Hall 27:59
Yeah, and I think with any brain damage it is, you’ve got to find a way of coping with your life, and if you can use your old skills, maybe in a slightly different way, then you matter, you’ve got a way up to getting better, rather than stop, but not in from scratch for a new project, or an old a new job. Can use the old skills put it into a newer and a new life, I think, right? And actually, even because my stroke happened.
Graham Hall 28:52
I talked to my manager at Upper North, and I was talking to her about whether it’s stopping playing. And moving into the music preparation side of life, like arranging, constructing, not arranging, and orchestrating and being some library works like that. So I was thinking doing that anyway, and then the stroke happens, and it sort of says “Well, you might do that anyway.”
Bill Gasiamis 29:30
So the stroke forced your hand, so to speak, into this new decision that you were thinking about making anyway.
Graham Hall 29:39
Yeah, the only thing was that I didn’t want to, I don’t think I would. I didn’t think I was not playing as much as I was before. That was the downside of it, I guess. But you know, music is music, and it helps everyone because the brain damage has helped get music in your life at some point, it’s just that, just I’m not I’m not any from playing with an orchestra anymore in a band.
Bill Gasiamis 30:20
A bit earlier, you you mentioned that during therapy it took 20 minutes to get the word “done” out. Now, early on, that must have been excruciating, and pardon me, if it wasn’t, but for me, it seems like it may have been giving you, or was it great for them to give you the space to get there after 20 minutes?
Bill Gasiamis 30:48
What’s it like sitting through those tests where the word “done” would have just come out before, quite easily, and then you had the stroke, and now you’re rehabilitating yourself, also now you’re getting rehabilitated. What’s it like to sit there through 20 minutes of trying to get to a single word?
Graham Hall 31:08
Well, I think because as a that level of playing of a musician, I like practice, so it doesn’t matter if it takes an hour or 10 minutes or whatever it is to make the end product, and even then, I’m always practicing with my speech and lack words and language. So it’s not problem, actually. And actually, of course, the “why I’m still here” of course, is because my wife, because she works with me, and also she’s a musician as well. So she knows how that works, how the brain, how the music helps other people. So there was no problem at home for that, really.
Graham Hall 32:11
And so it’s, I just making sure that was got the space and the time to do it, and the only thing that was the Speech and Language Therapists, was hard for them is because I used to be more practice, not only 10 an hour a day or two hours a week as that. You can’t do that, you got to be every single day.
Graham Hall 32:49
Our movement second, and I think they were quite a backed by that, because people just use their examples of Word, finding yourself until, well, you got an hour to do that, or three hours a day, or four hours a week. You can’t do that, you gotta say more and more and more to me.
Bill Gasiamis 33:25
So you’re a drummer, a drummer drums all day, every day, to get to right, to get to La Boheme, and to be able to be, you know, tight in your set you go, you have to practice all the time. So what you’re thinking is you can’t just practice for one hour to recover.
Graham Hall 33:43
No, you can’t.
Bill Gasiamis 33:44
You have to practice way more than that. Okay, I love that.
Graham Hall 33:48
Yeah, you can’t, you can’t do that. It’s just, well, it’s in my nature, it’s always been my nature. So it was a teenager, and even though it’s a different way of practice. So be it here, to me.
Bill Gasiamis 34:05
It is that kind of thing that you hear people talk about the 10,000 hour rule, you know, to become expert at something, you know, you have to do a minimum of 10,000 hours.
Graham Hall 34:19
Yeah, but I mean the old average, with some Papa, the cellist, and he was 90 something. And someone says “So you take years.” Do you see what practice? He says, “Well, I want to get better.” And he was 98, it’s just there.
Bill Gasiamis 34:45
Imagine being 98 and thinking you’re not good at cello still.
Graham Hall 34:50
Well, yeah, they do. I mean, I don’t think I’ve heard any musician that knows their birth coach. I mean, occasionally, just occasionally, knew a gig and a bar, I think, nailed it, but then the rest of the piece, you think “Oh, God” totally.
Bill Gasiamis 35:17
And only you would know. Nobody else would know.
Precision, Passion, and the Orchestra’s Role
Graham Hall 35:20
Well, yeah, I mean, when an ensemble with a band, with an orchestra, when you make a mistake in your head, maybe you will know there, or maybe the right, the guy sitting next to you might know that that’s be a problem, but the rest of the band won’t work. Or maybe a brass player will know that strong but the violist will not know what was wrong, or the or conductor will know deal was wrong, but everyone else will not will know that was wrong.
Bill Gasiamis 35:58
So in the scheme of things, then it doesn’t really matter, because you move on to the next piece, the audience most likely, definitely doesn’t.
Graham Hall 36:08
Exactly, yeah.
Bill Gasiamis 36:10
Yeah and therefore you guys pulled it off, that’s all that matters. I’ve been to La Boheme and I’ve been to a few other operas, and, I mean, it’s a sensational experience to be there. What’s your favorite piece that you’ve or show that you’ve participated in?
Graham Hall 36:33
I think, I mean the opera. Well, actually, I like the music for the opera. The vocal side of it is something that because you’re in the pit and you’re playing in the back of the pit, you don’t hear much singing, which is good sometimes. So you get more the impact from the orchestra sound, not necessarily the full impact where you do it from, from the audience side of it, although, well, now I think about it, there’s an opera by Benjamin Britten called Billy Budd, and in the scene.
Graham Hall 37:49
There are four drawers goes into the stage and up a ladder or a blade, and it’s like a battle going on with two ships, and there’s a fire Canyon and everyone and the choruses bring full pelt, and you’ve got two drums, and the sound is fantastic. It goes but it’s that’s quite rare, as it happens, because opera, the orchestra, they also do concert series as well, not just opera.
Graham Hall 38:48
So it’s a good well, it was a good fit for me because there’s different types of playing, different types of music going in, you’re not doing the same concert, every opera, every singing, two or three weeks, the different operas, different concerts. I think now I’m quite good that was there. It’s sad that I can’t enjoy it, that I did do it, and that’s gumbo now, and that’s aphasia now.
Bill Gasiamis 39:42
Somebody who’s got the type of experience that you have in the type of music and in the work that you’ve done for all those years? Do you have favorite popular bands? Do you have a favorite drummer? Who do you look up to? Up want to be like when you grow up?
Graham Hall 40:04
Well, I mean, first drummers. I guess in more jazz drummers would be like Buddy Rich. I guess it’s just not, think around I mean, I was more when I was doing opera, I didn’t like, to hear opera on its own, although I hear it when it was what to rehearse CDs and like that, but driving up and down leads, I use jazz really, I guess, or musicals, particularly so on time.
Graham Hall 41:02
I think he’s quite remarkable guy. But, I think all the people I’ve worked for, I can’t think of anyone that you think of one that was quite being a god for that, that the instrument.
Bill Gasiamis 41:34
Fair enough.
Graham Hall 41:34
Yeah, because they’re always a bit, I’ve been like, Buddy Rich. He’s a fantastic drummer, but he’s an awful manager, and once you know that, you think.
Bill Gasiamis 41:54
You mean, never met your heroes, because often disappoint.
Graham Hall 42:01
Yeah, it’s there sort of, in a sense. So, what sort of music do you like?
Bill Gasiamis 42:15
See, I have my moments. I can sit in the car and put on some classical music, just nothing in particular, just whatever’s on the classic FM on the radio, and really enjoy that. And I’ve been to operas, and we’ve been to theater productions and all that kind of stuff. The only thing I haven’t done that I haven’t seen is ballet, but I would appreciate that at the right when I’m in the right mood, on my cranky days, you know, I like listening to a little bit of, you know, heavy metal, ACDC, Metallica, that type of genre, and, you know, they seem to really move me in a certain direction.
Bill Gasiamis 42:58
And they help with, like, exercising something out of my body that needs to get out. But then there are days where I can’t possibly listen to music that’s that challenging, or, you know, that confronted or that heavy and then recently, I’ve been on a little bit of a binge of dance music in the 90s. In the 90s, dance house music was my thing, and now the artists that are putting on dance shows, we’ll call them rave shows or concerts around the world are just amazing, amazing at putting together great sounding dance tracks that really move you.
The Power of Music In Stroke And Speech Recovery
Bill Gasiamis 43:54
And I suppose I use music to move me in a certain direction, to help my mood, to quiet my mood, to calm me down, right, to lift me, to give me a little bit of, you know, endorphins or or, you know, serotonin or whatever. So I’ve found myself doing that over the years, where I have sessions where I binge a certain genre and then just really use it to move, to help me move in a certain direction or another. And often that can last for a few months or a few weeks, and then I’m not really particularly interested in what I’m listening to, right?
Graham Hall 44:50
But the difference, of course, is there’s no sound in this house. There’s never music, I mean, there’s really it was a TV. It was like that, but we never put any CDs, no cassettes, no records. Invoked my records as upstairs stored.
Bill Gasiamis 45:10
You or your wife never.
Graham Hall 45:13
Yeah, no.
Bill Gasiamis 45:16
Industry that you’re involved in.
Graham Hall 45:19
Well, yeah, I mean Janet, when she listens to music, when she practice for a sur session, then you’ll hear that. But apart from that, it’s just be low speech, like BBC, poor news, or something like that. But, and actually, I was thinking just before my story, but only since that happened, there’s no music whatsoever.
Graham Hall 46:00
The only time I have get music is when I orchestrate or arrange a piece of music for a different orchestra or ensemble, and then I can hear that piece of music, or sometimes I don’t necessarily want to hear the music, because I know what the music is. I’ve got the dots down written there so I can cobble out a tune, a harmony, or make the parts fit for that style, but it’s fine.
Bill Gasiamis 46:50
You don’t do the recreational music. You just do music for work or for a given task that you have to do.
Graham Hall 47:00
Yeah, because that helps me, I mean, the way the music, how the brain works with music, is just, you’re using all the brain for music. That is a quote, and I can’t find it. Oh, I’ve got it now, I can’t find this thing. Now, apologies for my speech.
Graham Hall 47:28
But it says “Musicians brain is the production of music works because of climbing ahead, working memory, decision making, motor control and connect it can eye coordination, memory, long term memory, conception, semantic memory, emotional thinking, control, the control of meaning and space, global and detailed perception, sustained ability.” So that’s what brain is in your brain, how music works in your brain. Well, that’s happening all the time, so you don’t often, don’t necessarily happen to hear it, because the brain is working anyway.
Bill Gasiamis 48:29
Yep, so you have a musical brain. Your brain is developing music and feel the music, see the music, experience the music. You know what it looks like. I imagine when you’re developing a new piece or writing or combining the notes together to make a new piece, I imagine you have like an idea of what it should sound like before you, so you can visualize it. So I can relate to that because I can visual, because I have a painting company, and we paint people’s homes, right? I can walk into a house where the client has no idea what to do, how to do it.
Bill Gasiamis 49:12
But I can visualize it so I can express to them what they want to hear about, how the house will look before I’ve even attempted to start the job, or before I’ve even won the job. And that sounds like what you can visualize the finished piece, because that’s how your brain works. It already has all the pieces in there, okay. So whereas, and you don’t have a need or a desire to do music for the sake of entertainment, like I do, I do it for the sake of entertainment, okay, and I suppose there are times when I can’t do.
Bill Gasiamis 50:00
Either when the sensory overload happens as well. So there is a time where I can be in my car and the moving traffic, and, you know, all the stuff that’s going on for me to get to my destination means that if I have music on, then that’s a really difficult experience. It’s hard for me to drive concentrate, etc, so I switch it off and I drive in silence and I don’t have the radio on either.
Bill Gasiamis 50:30
So I’ve never really thought about what role Music plays in my life, but it is very important, especially to experience some of those classic shows, productions, theaters or that have been around for 100 years. You know, Moulin Rouge is a classic example of how going and seeing Moulin Rouge in Melbourne, we went and saw it three times. It was so amazing, and it wasn’t because it was anything different or new. The music was that they use for Moulin Rouge now is more current.
Bill Gasiamis 51:22
So they’ve changed the tunes to express the particular scene with more current music. So I can relate to it. But the whole thing, the sound, the lighting, the actors, everything about it, was extremely moving, and that’s what I find it is being there absolutely gives you that clarity, the time where you’re not thinking about anything else, you’re just focusing on that, on that particular moment.
Bill Gasiamis 51:55
And it’s kind of meditative. And that’s, I think, what I do with music, I use it as a meditative time where I’m not thinking about other stuff, just the piece, just the heavy metal band, just the dance track, you know, just the classical track that I’m listening to at the time. And I just sucked into it, and I get I’m the kind of guy driving around in the car, moving my hands.
Graham Hall 52:25
Because when you win the band or the orchestra, of course, that’s not what happens for them, but the players, right? Because, you know, everyone’s clapping or whooping off that, but the players, then we’ll head down, the notes.
Bill Gasiamis 52:44
Work.
Graham Hall 52:45
Yeah, that’s fine.
Overcoming Spatial Challenges in Music After Stroke
Bill Gasiamis 52:52
Other deficits did you have to recover from? Were you dealing with anything more on your right side that was physically challenging as well, when you were picking up those drumsticks for the first time.
Graham Hall 53:07
It’s just as the spatial awareness of my left hand, always say, my left hand, become my right hand. It was just with like a looking like a Fiber Phone or rather phone, I will miss a note by two or three, two or three inches away, so I’ve got To mix makes making more visual sense of it, rather than just doing what it is. And because my right foot for like a small kid or something like that, there’s no there’s no power there. So if I did a small bit of kit playing, I just want use the bass drum. I use my left foot for the hi-hat, like a small kit.
Graham Hall 54:23
But it’s just the spatial awareness of where things was. It gets better, and it way did get better, actually, and now playing with a band with a tympani Kellogg, which is quite big, and that’s fine doing that. It’s, I can do that, or did do that. But I think what you’re saying about earlier on, it just, it’s not the plane as it when it gets better. It’s just the time it takes to get to the gig, doing the rehearsal, talking to people after the concert, or rehearsals like that, driving back. It’s the periphery of that is harder sometimes than the actual plane, and I guess.
Graham Hall 55:32
And then after two or three days, I’ll be wiped out, and they get up and running again. But it comes point to which you say that again to me, I’ve done again now I get a level, which I thought it was after my stroke. I sought good. I’ve got to my plane was better than I thought it would be. But after that, there’s no need to keep going on and on and on. I’m on the last gig was two months ago, and before that was only a year ago.
Graham Hall 56:27
So I’m not bothered about playing really, although two a year ago, I did a piece by Leonard Bernstein called the Chase Sister Psalms, which is a small band, although seven percussionists and some strings and chorus and it’s three movements on on Jewish music, and the third movement, there was no playing for me, so I was just playing, listen to it, and I getting up, after 10 years, I got the chills on the back of my neck, briefly for the rehearsal and in the concert.
Bill Gasiamis 57:37
Jesus the Chase Sister Psalms, Leonard Bernstein.
Graham Hall 58:00
Anyway, but that, was the first time I got the really enjoyment from that thing. It haven’t it happened since then, and in and sometimes I think maybe I don’t want to happen again, because it happens again frequently. I’ll miss what I’ve done before, makes sense?
Bill Gasiamis 58:37
So it distracts you from the task at hand?
Graham Hall 58:42
Well, yeah, maybe I just, I was quite, I was used now to not that lucky music, and suddenly, that second, I don’t want to hear it again, because otherwise it makes sense.
Bill Gasiamis 59:07
It does not make sense at all. Something nice, you liked it, and then you’re like.
Graham Hall 59:15
I know, but yeah, but you don’t want to do want to seems strange, because I don’t want to.
Bill Gasiamis 59:25
You want to make it about that. You don’t want it to be about that, I suppose, if I’m understanding you correctly, is the enjoyment shouldn’t be the goal, the it seems like the task, getting the sound right, getting it, you know, making sure you play tight is the task, and it sounds like the enjoyment should be like a an afterthought. If it comes, it comes, and I’ll in experience that, that’ll be fine, but it’s not what I’m going for.
Graham Hall 59:59
But maybe another thing is, I know, when I was playing before the stroke, I really enjoyed it with the playing of slack that, and I don’t want to be I know it was good to get it happened again, but I’m not used now to being a lower level of.
Bill Gasiamis 1:00:24
Aphasia.
Graham Hall 1:00:25
Yeah, that’s the word I’m searching for.
Bill Gasiamis 1:00:27
Okay, well, I would this is what I would say to you. I would say “Go for it, allow yourself. Allow yourself enjoyment of the of this thing that you do, because what you do brings so much enjoyment to other people. Allow yourself, if you find yourself there, to live in the moment, enjoy it for that time.”
Graham Hall 1:00:49
Like, yeah, but I mean, but all the work I’ve done since that’s helped, that’s put enjoyment in other people doing it, by the plane or the orchid or the audience by doing for orchestral pieces or these songs about aphasia, I’ve done for other people to think about how aphasia works and then get feedback from them saying they really enjoyed that and then used to playing it like that, but not from my myself, playing it.
Bill Gasiamis 1:01:32
My personal enjoyment. Yeah, look, I understand that it’s a different experience. After the stroke, things are altered, and you’re adjusting to them all the time. And you’ve had this experience, you don’t know what to do with it yet. Yeah, let it work it out, and let it work out, and you’ll find somehow, maybe you will, maybe you won’t. It doesn’t really matter. I don’t think it needs to matter. But I love the fact that you’ve found a little bit of enjoyment out of a piece, and then you thought “Oh, that’s a little bit jarring.”
Graham Hall 1:02:16
Yeah, it was quite got, it was just happened, and then again and again, it was again, another, wow, what’s happened? Although I do know what’s happened, but it’s strange, but, yeah, you say I’ve got the enjoyment from other people by playing some arrangements I’ve done and some music, and all the music preparation for other people so they can play piece or not.
Bill Gasiamis 1:02:54
I’ve had a look at your website, ghmusicprep.com, lovely pieces on that. I listened to those pieces, and they’re really lovely. That’s about all I can say, because I’m not musically minded, so I don’t know what else to say, other than either enjoyable.
Graham Hall 1:03:18
Have you heard the band camp website.
Bill Gasiamis 1:03:23
Perhaps I didn’t check that one. By the way, anyone watching and listening, though all these links will be in the show notes, so you’ll be able to find them. Maybe I didn’t go to the band camp one. I went to the website.
Graham Hall 1:03:37
But the grahamhall.bandcamp.com, and all these songs about aphasia. So all the music I’ve been arranged or created for different people like but I’ve altered the lyrics to suit the problems with aphasia. So, New York, New York, is short my talk. So it’s, I never heard of this word, but it’s called con progression lyrics. Which it means that the music is exactly it was before, with the chords and the harmony. The only thing that was new is that the lyrics is about, in my case, aphasia.
The Role of Music in Stroke And Speech Recovery
Bill Gasiamis 1:04:58
Okay, so on Bandcamp, the tracks I see when I click onto the link is the sound of aphasia. The Aphasia and mind, a little neuro music.
Graham Hall 1:05:25
I actually that I did it that’s been going on since after my stroke, and it helps me to figure out what’s happened to me with my life with aphasia, but of course, it helps me with my therapy. I hate the word therapy, but it is therapy because rhythm and rhyme, pretty rhyme helps my speech, it’s therapeutic. But yeah, although I hate the word therapy because I mean therapy means there’s be and we’ve stopped, but you never stop.
Bill Gasiamis 1:06:17
So like has a negative connotation.
Graham Hall 1:06:20
I don’t know why, but it does.
Bill Gasiamis 1:06:26
Yeah, although people do say they have been going to therapy for 20 years, like me, psychological therapy, right? I go. I’ve been going for 20 years, so I know what you mean about it, the word can probably be upgraded, or its meaning can be upgraded by now, but I know what, I know what you mean about that word, therapy, counseling to say, instead of therapy, when I go to see somebody, I like to say counseling.
Graham Hall 1:07:00
Yeah, that makes it makes sense, actually more than that, but I guess this therapy was not because of your stroke, but you didn’t, you know before.
Bill Gasiamis 1:07:15
No before and now and now, because of my stroke as well, and just because of all of the challenges that you know what it is, and it’s even though mine is, you know, psychological therapy, or counseling, or whatever you want to call it my version of therapy. I’ve also done physical therapy, I’ve also done cognitive therapy and other things, you know, in my recovery, or all through the times when I needed it. And I think I’ve stopped seeing it as that as well. Like I don’t really see it as therapy.
Bill Gasiamis 1:07:54
I see it as a necessity, something that every human being should be able to do have somebody that they can confide in, consult with, you know, discuss things deeply with, and I think it’s just missing from my circle of family and friends, not that they’re not capable of that, just that they’re not skilled with the task. So I go where the person who is sitting across me is skilled with the task of particularly dealing with my version of seeing life and approaching life and thinking about life.
Bill Gasiamis 1:08:34
You know my philosophy, where they can, not judge my philosophy and not even appreciate my philosophy, but allow me to express my philosophy and then challenge me on it. So I suppose it’s more that for me and right I wanted. I wanted physical therapy to be something similar when I went to therapy. I didn’t want to be passive in my therapy, yeah, where they said to me, today, we’re going to walk up and down the stairs, go and walk up and down the stairs.
Bill Gasiamis 1:09:06
So yeah, I mean, that’s so passive. I’m just going to come here and do what you tell me. I could do that at home. Yeah, one of the best times that I had at therapy physical therapy was when the therapist asked me “What do I want to achieve?” And I said to him “I want to run, and I don’t want to run marathons or go jogging as a pastime or anything like that. I want to be able to, if necessary, run across the road away from a dangerous situation with a car, that’s it just a safety kind of run if I need to.” And he said “Great, well, let’s work on that.”
Bill Gasiamis 1:09:48
And that was a similar approach to me going to my counselor and having a conversation. It’s like, okay, what do we want to talk about today? Well, today I want. Talk about that ah, yeah. And that question. If that question wasn’t asked, What do you want to talk about today? I perhaps wouldn’t have able, been able to talk about that thing with anyone that day. And I don’t think it’s for me, it’s not good to want to talk to somebody about something and not have a person to talk to about, just like, running.
Bill Gasiamis 1:10:26
If I want to be able to run across the road, then need, I need to source somebody who’s going to help me run across the road, not tell me to walk up and down a stair. Yeah, do you know what I mean? So in my mind, I’ve I use the word therapy, I suppose, to have a low level conversation with somebody to be able to just express to them where I’m attending, where I’ve attended.
Bill Gasiamis 1:10:55
But I’ve, far, I’ve replaced the word therapy many years ago with something else that anymore, and the connotation has gone for me, and I think that’s where some people struggle, is the connotation of the word makes them feel a bit icky about it, and then they avoid getting speech therapy, physical therapy, psychological therapy. They avoid it because it is a little bit icky. I agree there’s something about it, and I think it’s a Hollywood thing. I think Hollywood people have made it icky. Those high level, multi million dollar actors, you know, who?
Graham Hall 1:11:41
Yeah, it means the same thing. I hate the word recovery, because recovery means there’ll be an end product, the end game.
Bill Gasiamis 1:11:53
So what you want is, you want to denominalize that. You want to add the ing to the end of that word so that you’re recovering.
Graham Hall 1:12:01
Recurring or otherwise, causes betterment.
Bill Gasiamis 1:12:04
And it’s a forever task. It’s not exactly, because it is.
Graham Hall 1:12:11
Yeah, it’s not a temper with my friend and I think because of you and my stroke, there’s always something you can get, get better at. There’s not just a cut up day and say, right, you’re fine. You’re not fine, you’ll never be fine now, and even with, like, even though I work with music, but I’ve got music Adonia, which means not enjoyed music. It doesn’t mean that I want to do music.
Graham Hall 1:12:52
And people look at me think, “Well, you must enjoy music” not playing, not hearing it, but I enjoy the process or the preparation of music. And people look pretty simple. It’s a musician you don’t like music. Different types of enjoyment, I guess, of beauty.
Bill Gasiamis 1:13:24
Yeah, I hear you. What’s been the hardest thing about stroke for you?
Graham Hall 1:13:33
To me, life in general.
Bill Gasiamis 1:13:36
Yeah, just what’s something that has as a result of the stroke being the most hardest?
Graham Hall 1:13:47
I get speech, I mean, I know, I can’t think anything else. Rather than that, I would like to get my speech as it was. Even though I have low days, which I can’t enunciate as I want to be, and enunciation is quite hard to say, as well as spelling it, I can’t remember to spell it, but it’s just having occasion. I woke up and I think sort of came here to me.
Bill Gasiamis 1:14:35
I do know exactly what you mean when you wake up in the morning. I had forgotten about all of this for one moment.
Graham Hall 1:14:43
Yeah, you were a couple great. No, I can’t talk or as talk as I want to be. I mean, there’s good moments from it, yeah, and there’s good reasons sometimes. Is because there’s no problem the No problem driving every day, in and out for giggles like that. And gearing is like that. And now my relationship for my wife, is as solid as it was previous, which is fantastic. And also the friends around me quite I can talk to them and whatever. Although there’s two people that have worked by the wayside? What were they? What by the wayside mean?
Bill Gasiamis 1:15:48
Gone, by the way.
Graham Hall 1:15:51
And they’ve sort of not been they want to talk to me, I guess, I don’t know why.
Bill Gasiamis 1:16:01
It’s more about, it’s not about.
Graham Hall 1:16:05
Yeah, and I’ve got new friends on that. So either is by a stroke or not.
Bill Gasiamis 1:16:15
Yeah, it’s challenging being the friend of somebody who’s really unwell, especially if you don’t have the skills to I don’t know. You might not have the psychological, emotional and mental skills to deal with what happened to your friend, let alone interact with them, and it seems a little bit harsh, but the best thing that they’ve did was not attend and not be there, because if they’re going to be awkward and if they don’t know what to say and if it’s going to be difficult, well, you know, maybe it’s better that they don’t attend.
Graham Hall 1:16:57
Yeah, I mean, I don’t know what the the numbers? Because, I guess some managers and relationships stopped because of aphasia.
Bill Gasiamis 1:17:09
Yeah, very much.
Graham Hall 1:17:10
Because that their person or their other partner don’t want to know, or they don’t understand, or it gets harder and harder.
Bill Gasiamis 1:17:23
It’s triggering as well. So, yeah, you know, your partner has a stroke, and then all of a sudden your mortality comes into the picture. It’s like, you have to think about “Oh, wow. Yeah, that was touch.” and go “Oh man” you know, like mortality becomes front and center for the first time, perhaps, in somebody’s life. And then it’s a big deal. It’s my wife was just as unskilled to deal with how she would experience my stroke as I was, it’s a big job for her to go through all of that, you know.
Bill Gasiamis 1:18:00
So she’s been amazing. But you can understand why some people who have got, perhaps some other personal or emotional or psychological issues can’t also now deal with stroke of somebody else. It’s a big deal.
Graham Hall 1:18:16
Yeah, it’s what their previous life was impacts the life they’ve got now.
Bill Gasiamis 1:18:25
Correct, how they’re going to respond. So I feel like I was initially upset with people who went by the wayside also, but I think I’d like to give them a bit more grace these days, give them a little bit of grace. And, you know, understanding.
Graham Hall 1:18:45
Yeah, but I guess when you have a conversation with people and you can’t explain exactly words I want to use, it’s harder for them to understand. And sometimes maybe they’ve got they perceived it. I’m not what I’m searching for. You say what I’m searching for, Bill.
Bill Gasiamis 1:19:18
You’re not whole, or you’re not the same, or you’ve changed.
Graham Hall 1:19:24
Yeah, and they’re not, I know.
Bill Gasiamis 1:19:27
It’s like they can’t interact with you. Their interaction with you was not necessarily based on friendship, but on how you spoke to each other, how you played together, and then that’s taken away, and then they don’t know how to relate to you anymore.
Graham Hall 1:19:47
Yeah, although I think musicians or museums are quite malleable by coping with different levels of playing. Within a piece of that. So the central thing with damage, they know that you me can play, and if it’s a bit slower, or it’s not just slightly in time, they merge into in and out. Making sense?
Bill Gasiamis 1:20:23
Yeah, adjust.
Graham Hall 1:20:24
Yeah, and that seems quite, exactly, well, quite to adjust with other people around, even the band or the playing for one piece. And then do you see them for several months? There’s always a jar between the right groove, if you like. But this is a quite malleable good word. And I think all the musicians, all my friends, coach me quite easily. Actually, it’s the non musicians that found a bit maybe okay, because you mean.
Bill Gasiamis 1:21:03
I do know what you mean. That might, you may have sort of touched on the difference between musically minded and, you know, non musically minded brains and how a musically minded brain is less fixed, less set in concrete, whereas, potentially, a non musical mind has the tendency to be more set and fixed. And that’s why mindset is such an important skill. You know, the mindset of stroke recovery needs to be about recovering after stroke.
Bill Gasiamis 1:21:48
That’s, you know, that’s the mindset that you require. It’s a recovery mindset, in as somebody who is experiencing stroke from their friend’s stroke experience, rr their wife’s or their husband’s life experience or a stroke experience. You know, maybe they can’t see the shift. Maybe they can’t experience that mindset shift to go from what regular life was to a recovery version of that, and what that means.
Bill Gasiamis 1:22:24
And I certainly understand, like, there were times where my wife said “You know, I just don’t want this version of Bill, like, I want the other version back.” And it’s like “Okay, so do I, but that’s not possible.” You can’t, and then it’s like, let’s re create it. Let’s change it and make it better or different, or whatever, adjust. Let’s adapt, let’s be malleable.
Graham Hall 1:22:51
Yeah, because, whether an orchestra, you’re not playing the same piece every day, different styles, different playing styles, small or large ensembles like that, a different conductor every two or three days, different course and things like that, so they can easily cope.
Bill Gasiamis 1:23:22
For that, you can’t be fixed in the way I’m going to play, like this. Everyone has to play, just to me.
Graham Hall 1:23:30
Yeah, no, exactly, yeah. And even playing with also within the schedule, there’ll be a schools concerts, or maybe there’ll be a higher gig profile concert in London, or like that, or maybe the crucial band halls like that. So different level of playing, although the level would be good, but sometimes it’s really higher or been bit lower, or because of the scores, comes that you can relax a bit and not being so big to me, I do so. So you all got to move, whatever the situation is between you’ve got.
Bill Gasiamis 1:24:21
You got to move between emotional states, highs, lows, yeah, middles, okay, so that’s good. That gives a lot of flexibility and a lot of adaptability and malleability. It’s exactly what you said, I love that.
Lessons Learned from Stroke And Speech Recovery
Graham Hall 1:24:38
Yeah, but I think that’s why my progress is there because I’m using both parts of my brain, actually, it’s not just left and right, which is, I know he said that languages are left. Well, the hub will be left, but it hops around your brain.
Bill Gasiamis 1:25:07
Because of Neuroplasticity, it’s true that, you would have more space, more places in your head, as opposed to me about where language can occur, because you have that musical language, and I would have less, and it would make sense that a musician who’s been playing for 50 years is going to have more neuronal pathways, that they can recruit to help with things like other sounds, other sounds like voice, expression, words, etc. It’s true that you would just have a better, a different baseline than I would have to begin a rehabilitation.
Bill Gasiamis 1:25:57
In that space, I and your friends who fell by the wayside that it’s just about how they relate to you now may they may just be struggling to relate in this new way, they’re less malleable. They just kind of moved on, yeah.
Graham Hall 1:26:23
But of course, every studies I’ve learned about brain and music, particularly the guys that look about scans in the brain, they look at the scan, and the only thing they can say by that is the musician’s brain. They can’t say that is a writer or a mathematician or a lawyer, but depending on where it is and the scan of the brain, which left side, right that is a musician, which is fantastic.
Bill Gasiamis 1:27:12
More activity, far more activity.
Graham Hall 1:27:16
I did some scan, my third scan my brain from study for trying to remember 20 words to see which parts the brain lights up, and not just between normal words, but archaic words like barnacle, binnacle, which is a housing for a compass, and different types of iguana, which you never heard before. So I have to practice those words for two weeks, put in the scan. And results was that was more of more participation in my right side than normal people use on my left side. So I’ve got the proof that I’m using my brain in its full entirety.
Bill Gasiamis 1:28:28
Yeah. What has there been any lessons from stroke? Has stroke taught you something? Have you become wiser, or has there been an “Aha” moment? What has stroke taught you?
Graham Hall 1:28:42
I’ve got more and more books about the brain than music ever my kindle. I mean, I’ve got got a list there. There’s a book by Gardener, The Damaged Mind, which is good, actually, and neuropsychology of art, which is about different either writers or or painters or composers to have brain damage or brain injury. And, of course, anything by books by Oliver Sacks. I mean this book, particularly about bringing the music called Music Ophelia. Have you read that book?
Bill Gasiamis 1:29:52
I haven’t, but it sounds like a very interesting title, Music Ophelia, tales of music and the brain.
Graham Hall 1:29:59
Yeah, actually any books by Wild for sex. There’s a book called, An Anthropologist on Mars. That’s it, and also, one of the books about aphasia, called I Stroke, A Diary Of Recovery, by Douglas Ritchie. I And A Man Who Lost His Language by Sheila kale.
Advice for Other Stroke Survivors
Graham Hall 1:30:55
And all those two or three books called Stroke Diary and it’s more, I think that’s why it’s what it’s come out for me was a stroke by how remarkable we’ve got in our heads. We should never think of that before. Obviously, think about it sooner happens and not there. But now I realize that’s three pound clearly in your head is just a remarkable organ. Why does anyone think about that before?
Graham Hall 1:31:47
Because it’s just, and what’s remarkable, of course, when I was talking to students, but the students says, either talk for them about aphasia, and I’m talking about my left language part by using my left language part, which is remarkable if you think about it, because normally, if it’s any damage, you never use the damage was broken. Use the other side of it, but the brain copes.
Bill Gasiamis 1:32:28
Looks for new ways to adapt and to rewire and to gain something back. For a lot of people, that’s definitely possible, for some people, depending on the level of damage, it’s not possible, but absolutely there’s it may not look the same speech. Your speech doesn’t sound seem the same as it did before, but it’s still speech. It’s still communication, it’s still something that has come back. And that’s the thing, sometimes walking doesn’t look like walking did before the stroke for a person, but it is a form of walking, and you’re upright.
Bill Gasiamis 1:33:10
And I know you might be painful, or it might be with a limp or or whatever, but that is the sign of that Neuroplasticity has occurred, you know, it is walking. So, I want to wrap up, because we’ve been talking for a while, and I really appreciate the chat.
Graham Hall 1:33:31
That’s fine.
Bill Gasiamis 1:33:32
I want to ask you, what would you like to say to other stroke survivors, someone that is in a similar position to you after having experienced a stroke and dealing with aphasia.
Graham Hall 1:33:46
Well, I just practice, don’t stop practicing. Ever, ever, even during your line days in your life, keep practicing, but particularly with aphasia, because if you don’t practice your speech, will get low before and I think that’s why a lot of people I’ve talked to, with aphasia, and not even depending what the age, but even so young or old, they put a level which I hate, the word I’m supposed to be brought is the level of which you act.
Graham Hall 1:34:45
And they’ll stop thinking about it, bright sync, and the speech will get lower, and actually, when you get older, it becomes harder. So obviously, with anything with life, but for me anyway, speech is what, that’s my gig now. Speech.
Bill Gasiamis 1:35:14
I love it. I know what you mean. Speech is your gig now, that makes sense about all the stuff you said about music.
Final Thoughts and Reflections
Graham Hall 1:35:20
Yeah, because it’s just, you know, I’d rather get better with that than my plan, I guess.
Bill Gasiamis 1:35:33
Nailed it and on that. Okay, thank you so much for joining me on the podcast.
Graham Hall 1:35:41
Yeah, thank you, Bill. Thank you very much.
Bill Gasiamis 1:35:43
That’s a wrap, what a lovely conversation. Thank you.
Graham Hall 1:35:48
Thank you.
Bill Gasiamis 1:35:50
You’ve done well. It’s about an hour and a half, but that’s okay.
Graham Hall 1:35:56
Yeah, you might want to cut it down.
Bill Gasiamis 1:35:58
Yeah, no, I won’t be cutting it. I mean, it’s perfect. It’s just when they get too much beyond an hour and a half. You know, it’s just not my format. My format is between an hour and an hour and a half, but that’s okay, it doesn’t matter. It was all relevant, and it was just a really deep, it was a really lovely conversation.
Bill Gasiamis 1:36:19
So I actually gain an insight into what it’s like for people who have experienced aphasia. And I’ve got some other interviews that I’ve done with people with Aphasia different, and that’s what’s great about this is I love adding interviews to that playlist, that aphasia playlist, because people struggle to come onto a podcast when their speech is what they consider not good enough. And yeah, I know most stroke survivors won’t listen to the full interview, because they don’t have aphasia. People with Aphasia will.
Graham Hall 1:37:04
Yeah, I’m sure just, I mean, it’s a fantastic topic, actually, with aphasia, talking with aphasia people, or the people talking about aphasia with aphasia, good helps. Then, of my course, and it’s that actually, because I used to talk to students in Sheffield, the course for speech and sleep and therapy courses, and every two or three months, I talk to them in small groups about how works, the facial works or not works.
Graham Hall 1:37:48
But because of funding, they’ve stopped that. And now because Species Family Service are quite remarkable. Jobs, actually, and it’s just, it’s bad in this business. Maybe the same for Australia, but the funding is just.
Bill Gasiamis 1:38:15
Always, it’s same issue everywhere that what’s great about this podcast is, I hope that speech therapists and people who know about aphasia can access it and get an insight that they couldn’t get before that’s kind of the whole purpose.
Bill Gasiamis 1:38:33
Yeah, create a database, a library of stories where everyone can access it, and that can help either the person who’s directly impacted by aphasia or the person that helps people with aphasia, loved ones, family members who are struggling, you know, whatever. So that’s why I love this might sound a bit cringy, but I think it’s brave when people with Aphasia come onto the podcast.
Graham Hall 1:39:05
Yeah.
Bill Gasiamis 1:39:06
It’s just because it’s, I know there’s a lot of challenge around it, and, yeah, the expectation to be, I don’t know what not, what’s the word like, I don’t know, often, what I find is people with aphasia that suffer the most is the other person on the other side of the conversation makes it hard by winding them up, or putting words into their mouth, or not being patient.
Graham Hall 1:39:37
Yeah, but it’s harder for them, like quite few, because you’re working overload to make sense of what words I’ve just said, yeah. So it’s harder for them, for us, I guess, to me, as well as sometimes bit harder, because you’ve got to figure out what that person said and translate it into normal English. Yeah, not aphasia, speak.
Bill Gasiamis 1:40:16
Well, that’s it, that’s my job. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it, thank you. This will be out in a few weeks or so, something like that. Look out for it.
Graham Hall 1:40:24
Okay, fine.
Bill Gasiamis 1:40:25
Reach out, anytime. If you have anything you’d like to share, ask whatever, send me an email.
Graham Hall 1:40:32
Great. Thank you. That’s great, good night. Bye.
Bill Gasiamis 1:40:39
Well, that’s a wrap on today’s episode, a massive thank you to Graham Hall for sharing his journey so honestly, his story is a reminder that recovery is ongoing and that speech can improve with practice, patience and creativity. Before you go, here are a few things you can do to stay connected. If you want to learn more about Graham, visit his website at ghmusicprep.com, and check out his music at grahamhall.bandcamp.com, both links are in the show notes.
Bill Gasiamis 1:41:12
Now, new YouTube subscribers are welcome. With 320 people joining every month, we’re about to hit 5000 subscribers. Make sure you subscribe. If you haven’t yet be a part of the conversation, drop a comment in the YouTube comment section below the video, or share the episode with someone who you think may find it helpful. Podcast listeners, thank you for your support. Ratings and Reviews helping to spread awareness and connect more people with stroke recovery stories. That’s all for now, I’ll catch you in the next episode.
Intro 1:41:52
Importantly, we present many podcasts designed to give you an insight and understanding into the experiences of other individuals, opinions and treatment protocols discussed during any podcast are the individual’s own experience, and we do not necessarily share the same opinion, nor do we recommend any treatment protocol. Discussed all content on this website and any linked blog, podcast or video material controlled this website or content is created and produced for information or purposes only, and is largely based on the personal experience of Bill Gasiamis.
Intro 1:42:22
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Intro 1:42:47
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Intro 1:43:11
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